Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Supportive friend: Publicly stands up for a friend harmed by a musician, calling out the band for silence: “one of my friends was groomed by your rhythm guitarist and you still havent said anything about it”.
- Self-aware: Openly reflects on her own insecurities and changing feelings, like her voice and appearance: “my singing voice used to make me extremely dysphoric but i think its starting to grow on me” and “being a masc trans girl is so annoying because i deadass just look like a man 90% of the time”.
- Playful humor: Uses lighthearted jokes and memes frequently, e.g. “deactivating twitter. hmu on CeeLo Green Official App” and many “ME AND WHO” quote tweets like this one.
- Affectionate romantic: Expresses desire for connection and affection openly, such as “I NEED A GIRLFRIEND SO BAD” and repeated calls for a valentine like “SOMEONE PLEASE BE MY VALENTINE”.
- Creative gamer: Identifies as an artist and musician and also shares gaming clips and enthusiasm: bio mentions “artist, musician,” and tweets like “i <3 stealing kills” and “thinking about replaying miitopia and tomodachi life,, who wanna be in it”.
Weaknesses:
- External validation: Frequently seeks reassurance and attention from others, e.g. “do i give off top bottom or switch vibes” and repeated “send me strawpages while i sleep” posts like this.
- Harsh self-image: Speaks negatively about herself and her womanhood, e.g. “look man i already know im never gonna be a woman you dont gotta keep rubbing it in” and “being a masc trans girl is so annoying because i deadass just look like a man 90% of the time”.
- Romantic impatience: Expresses urgent, almost desperate need for lesbian experiences and partners, e.g. “i need something lesbian to happen to me immediately” and “i need something lesbian to happen to me RIGHT NOW”.
- Emotional oversharing: Shares intense feelings and personal struggles publicly in rapid succession, like “i have like 13 exes and i think theres only like 2 or 3 exes that DONT despise me” and frustration with her body and milk production in “there is so much milk coming out of me today”.
- Online dependency: Relies heavily on Twitter interactions for stimulation and connection, saying things like “i need to get off twitter because what the fuck is this” yet continually asking followers to engage, e.g. “send me strawpage stuff im bored”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
Lisa fits best because she’s smart, creative, and intensely earnest about her interests, much like this user being an “artist, musician, arachnologist” and openly nerding out about music and games, e.g. “listening to csh makes me feel like a kid again makes me feel really happy for some reason” and “thinking about replaying miitopia and tomodachi life,, who wanna be in it”. Lisa’s also famously introspective and insecure about how she’s perceived, which parallels tweets like “being a masc trans girl is so annoying because i deadass just look like a man 90% of the time” and “i do not look like an adult wtf”. The user’s outspoken moral streak and frustration with people’s behavior echoes Lisa’s social conscience and ranty side, as seen in “why do men talk about women like this” and “i need to get off twitter because what the fuck is this”. At the same time, Lisa is deeply romantic and yearning despite feeling out of place, which matches this user’s constant lesbian pining in tweets like “I NEED A GIRLFRIEND SO BAD” and “i need something lesbian to happen to me immediately”. Overall, the mix of creativity, sensitivity, moral intensity, and romantic angst makes Lisa Simpson the closest match.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
They lean Extraverted: they constantly seek interaction and connection, asking for engagement and company, like “SOMEONE PLEASE PLAY FORTNITE WITH ME”, “chat reveal yourself”, and “SOMEONE PLEASE BE MY VALENTINE”. Their focus is more on ideas, vibes, and possibilities than concrete details, suggesting Intuition: they talk in feelings and concepts such as “yearning as a lesbian is so pathetic but in like a sexy way” and abstract community dynamics like “there is no group that hates lesbians more than lesbians”. They are clearly Feeling-oriented, prioritizing values, relationships, and emotional experiences: defending others (“one of my friends was groomed by your rhythm guitarist and you still havent said anything about it”) and dwelling on love/validation (“i need a valentine”, “I NEED A GIRLFRIEND SO BAD”). Their lifestyle appears spontaneous and open-ended, fitting Perceiving: they bounce between games, music, haircuts, and art on impulse, e.g. “who wanna play fort with me” and “i need to get back into drawing bruh i have so much i wanna do”, and they frequently make in-the-moment emotional posts instead of structured plans. Overall, a highly expressive, socially-seeking, values-driven and spontaneous online presence aligns best with ENFP.
Some pickup lines for you
- You keep tweeting that you ‘need something lesbian to happen’ and you ‘need a valentine’—I main T4T CaitVi and queue Fortnite; does that qualify as an event or do I need to buy Mitski AND Jimmy Eat World tickets first?
- You said Vi from Arcane gives you gender envy, but honestly I’m just trying to be your powder so we can have a whole sapphic Zaun arc together.
- As a chubby, masc, glasses-wearing trans lesbian gamer who’s back into singing and misses her short hair, you’ve basically speedrun my type—can I be the girlfriend you keep subtweeting about, or do I have to submit a Strawpage application first?
- You keep asking ‘ME AND WHO’ under every cute couple post, but you also tweeted ‘hi im a lesbian with glasses who want me’—I’m just here to formally raise my hand and say: me. I want you. Please and thank you.
- You say listening to Car Seat Headrest makes you feel like a kid again; I say we throw on some CSH, replay Miitopia and Tomodachi Life with us as a couple, and speedrun turning ‘nothing lesbian has happened to me’ into a discontinued series.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Emily | 18 | lesbian artist & musician in CA. Once missed a Mitski presale but scored Jimmy Eat World pit tickets, so I’m calling it character development.– @_famousprophets
Your signature cocktail
Lesbian Yearning in the Pit
This cocktail is strong but bright, like snagging pit tickets and screaming along to Jimmy Eat World instead of Mitski, a nod to their excitement in “unfortunately not seeing mitski this time BUT i did get pit tickets for jimmy eat world so im very excited”. Blood orange vodka brings vivid, sapphic drama and a little angst, echoing posts like “i need something lesbian to happen to me immediately” and “I NEED A GIRLFRIEND SO BAD”. Cold brew coffee liqueur channels late-night gaming and chaotic energy from “who wanna play fort with me” and “SOMEONE PLEASE PLAY FORTNITE WITH ME”. Lavender-honey syrup is soft, femme, and a little dreamy, mirroring their artistic, sapphic side in “hi im a lesbian with glasses who want me” and their desire for something tender and romantic in “i need a valentine”. Sparkling grapefruit soda adds fizzy, slightly bitter brightness for all the self-aware humor and venting like “there is no group that hates lesbians more than lesbians” and “being a masc trans girl is so annoying because i deadass just look like a man 90% of the time”. Finally, a dash of saline represents their emotional complexity and resilience when calling out serious stuff, such as “one of my friends was groomed by your rhythm guitarist and you still havent said anything about it”, giving the drink depth beneath the sweetness and sparkle.
Your Hogwarts House
Hufflepuff
Emily most strongly reads as a Hufflepuff, with secondary Ravenclaw/Gryffindor traits. She shows a big emphasis on affection, connection, and wanting to care for and be cared for, like when she writes about needing a valentine and a girlfriend: “I NEED A GIRLFRIEND SO BAD” and “SOMEONE PLEASE BE MY VALENTINE”, which reflects Hufflepuff’s focus on love and companionship. Her sense of fairness and moral concern is clear when she calls out a band for ignoring abuse allegations: “one of my friends was groomed by your rhythm guitarist and you still havent said anything about it” and insists she’s serious about it: “yes i am. i wouldnt make jokes about stuff like that”, showing loyalty to her friend and a strong justice instinct. She’s repeatedly supportive and gentle with others and herself, like affirming healthy love and body acceptance in “if you dont love every part of your partner then you dont truly love them and i will die on this hill” and validating herself as “a chubby girl” in “as a chubby girl i can confirm this is true”, which is very Hufflepuff-coded kindness and inclusivity. While she has some Gryffindor-like bluntness in callouts and some Ravenclaw-like creativity as an artist and musician, her defining traits are loyalty, care, and a desire for warm, mutual relationships—core Hufflepuff qualities.
Your movie
Your song
First Love / Late Spring - Mitski
Mitski fits them perfectly both in taste and in mood: they’re devastated about missing her shows, like when they said "I DIDNT GET THE FUCKING MITSKI PRESALE" and joked about her performing at a high school in "mitski why are you performing at a high school😭😭😭". First Love / Late Spring is all about messy yearning and feeling out of place in your own body and relationships, which echoes their posts like "i need something lesbian to happen to me immediately" and "I NEED A GIRLFRIEND SO BAD". The song’s vulnerability lines up with their openness about dysphoria and gender, such as "being a masc trans girl is so annoying because i deadass just look like a man 90% of the time" and "look man i already know im never gonna be a woman you dont gotta keep rubbing it in". At the same time, Mitski’s intensity and raw emotion mirror how they tweet with big feelings about love, identity, and community—from "yearning as a lesbian is so pathetic but in like a sexy way" to calling out harm in their scene in "one of my friends was groomed by your rhythm guitarist and you still havent said anything about it". Overall, the song captures that combination of romantic desperation, self-consciousness, and soft-but-intense lesbian energy that runs through their timeline.
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