_petalite
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Moe Szyslak is the perpetually depressed, alcoholic bartender from The Simpsons who often expresses suicidal thoughts and a bitter view of the world. The user’s tweet "i need to kill myself" mirrors Moe’s frequent suicidal musings. Their reliance on alcohol is evident in "only happy when im not sober lol", similar to Moe’s constant drinking. The user’s cynicism and desire to harm those who inconvenience them, as seen in "i wish harm upon those who inconvenience me", aligns with Moe’s bitter outlook. Their chronic frustration with technology and feeling that "everything is in such a fragile balance" reflect Moe’s sense of hopelessness and constant struggle.

Your MBTI personality Type
The user shows strong introverted tendencies, focusing on inner thoughts and rarely engaging socially: "bored and alone", "i talk to my shark", "i wish i could have an hour of peace ever". Their language is abstract and future‑oriented, reflecting intuition: "my goal in life is to help the people i care about and then vanish", "there is really no meaningful impact i could make from my existences in life or death". Decision‑making is driven by feelings and personal values rather than logical analysis: "i want to get my family to hate me so i can kill myself without feeling bad", "i hate women like if you agree!!!!", "i wish harm upon those who inconvenience me". The pattern is spontaneous, disorganized and open‑ended, typical of perceiving: "ill try to make it to 2026 i guess", "weekly can i kill myself yet poll", "i am entirely serious, every time i try touching windows my pc has weird ass issues its so annoying".

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Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Tech enthusiast navigating life's chaos. Once hosted a web design competition with only my cat as a judge. Here for memes and support!– @_petalite

Your signature cocktail
This cocktail, called Broken Boot, mirrors the darkness and glitchy frustration of @_petalite. The black coffee liqueur and absinthe capture the bitter, sleepless nights and the desire to escape sobriety, echoing the tweet "only happy when im not sober lol". The sour lemon adds a sting of tearful sadness, like the line "i need to kill myself". A splash of cola represents the constant tech glitches she laments, "im at the depression stage of grief with trying to use windows". Finally, a hint of simple syrup offers a fleeting sweet that reflects moments when she says "i wish i could see stars".

Your Hogwarts House
The user shows a self‑preserving, ruthless mindset that matches Slytherin's core traits. They say 'i need to kill myself' and 'i want to get my family to hate me so i can kill myself without feeling bad', indicating a willingness to manipulate relationships for personal relief. Their hateful statements such as 'i hate women' and 'i wish harm upon those who inconvenience me' reflect the cunning, merciless side of Slytherin. Even when they mention helping others, it is framed as a temporary goal before vanishing, showing ambition to escape pain on their own terms. These patterns align most closely with Slytherin's emphasis on ambition, self‑interest, and a willingness to use any means to achieve personal ends.

Your movie

Your song
The recurring suicidal thoughts and self‑harm in the timeline – e.g., 'i want to kill myself' and 'i am entirely serious, every time i try touching windows my pc has weird ass issues its so annoying' – echo the raw confession in the lyric 'I hurt myself today to see if I still feel.' The feeling of emptiness and hopelessness is captured in lines like 'its so pointless' and 'i wish i could see stars,' mirroring the song’s refrain 'the pain is all I've ever known.' The repeated references to alcohol, ketamine, and wanting to 'vanish' align with the track's themes of addiction and regret. Overall, the tone of despair makes 'Hurt' an apt anthem for this user.

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