Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Passionate fan: Expresses intense enthusiasm and affection for favorites, e.g. calling characters 'wife' and 'oshi' in posts like “THAT'S WIFE!!!!! THAT'S MY WIFE LOOK AT HIM GO!!!!!!!” and “oshi so talented wadafak.....”.
- Creative thinker: Invents AUs and character scenarios in detail, such as developing boarding school ideas and domestic dynamics in the bustafellows thread like “boarding school au? like what if they met earlier? :3”.
- Playful humor: Uses jokes, exaggerated reactions, and wordplay (e.g. 'bassaday', 'eeper', 'snorkmimimi') in posts like “happy bassaday ❤️ please get the pun please pleas please” and “i was about to say something but i forgor um”.
- Emotionally expressive: Openly shares feelings of joy, love, embarrassment, and overwhelm, as seen in “i need about 20 business days to be able to act normal again ohh ny god” and “i'm gonna start crying uuuueueueueuueeu FUCK”.
- Analytical fan: Breaks down character traits and relationships thoughtfully, explaining why they like mozu/chuu in detail in posts like “eto. they stupid kyaaa more srs answer they're both ppl who don't have the most solid grasp on their humanity…”.
Weaknesses:
- Self-destructive talk: Frequently uses language about wanting to die or kill themself, e.g. “i need to kill myself i hate being in this house” and “I NEED TO KILL MYSELF”.
- Harsh self-image: Describes themself negatively or as a burden, such as “im teeny tiny” and joking about acting 'stupid' or unable to be 'normal' in tweets like “i need about 20 business days to be able to act normal again ohh ny god”.
- Environment distress: Expresses strong hatred or distress about their living situation, e.g. “i need to kill myself i hate being in this house” and “freezing to death wouldn't be bad either”.
- Health neglect: Acknowledges health issues but treats them jokingly, like “i think my anemia is going to get about x8362810292763 times worse tmr 🩵 i love this for me”, suggesting they may not prioritize care.
- Overattachment coping: Relies heavily on fictional 'wife' and oshi as emotional anchors, e.g. repeated posts like “my wife... i miss my wife.......” and “i miss my wife... i wish wife would hug me and pat my head and kiss me and”, hinting at escapism from real-life stress.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
Lisa fits best because she’s a highly emotional, introspective nerd who channels intense feelings into obsessive interests and creative thought. This user info-dumps lovingly about a specific series/"wife" with long threads like “eto. they stupid kyaaa more srs answer they're both ppl who don't have the most solid grasp on their humanity but try their best to understand more with the one person who both won't judge them and will also go along with their ideas no matter how 'silly' it may sound to others”, which parallels Lisa’s passionate monologues about the things she cares about. They’re self-aware, tiny, and a bit self-deprecating, saying “almost 30cm 😞 im teeny tiny”, echoing Lisa’s awareness of being physically small yet emotionally intense. Their frequent dramatic, depressive phrasing—like “i don't want anything i just want to die” and “I NEED TO KILL MYSELF”—mirrors Lisa’s canon struggles with sadness, isolation, and existential angst, just expressed in very online hyperbole. At the same time, they gush over their oshi/wife and creative works—“oshi so talented wadafak.....”, “THAT'S WIFE!!!!! THAT'S MY WIFE LOOK AT HIM GO!!!!!!!”—showing the same earnest, over-invested fandom energy Lisa has for jazz, books, and causes. Overall, they read as a modern, very-online Lisa Simpson: anxious, hyper-verbal, romantic about their faves, and constantly oscillating between despair and idealistic affection.
Your MBTI personality Type
INFP
They read as an introvert (I): their world seems centered on inner fantasies, oshi, and fictional relationships (e.g., intense wife/oshi fixation like “my wife... i miss my wife.......”), and there is no sign of in-person socializing or large friend groups, just them live‑tweeting streams and private feelings (“i need to kill myself i hate being in this house”). Their language and interests point strongly to intuition (N): they spin little scenarios and AUs such as “boarding school au? like what if they met earlier? :3” and focus on character psychology and relationships rather than concrete real‑life details (“eto. they stupid kyaaa more srs answer they're both ppl who don't have the most solid grasp on their humanity but try their best to understand more…”). They are clearly feeling (F): most posts are raw emotional reactions—affection, yearning, self‑deprecation, and dramatic expressions like “THIS YAOIER ISTG”, “i don't want anything i just want to die”, and constant love for “wife,” rather than any detached analysis or debate. They lean perceiving (P): they admit to distraction and lack of structure (“5.5hrs LMAO im distracted 100”), improvise headcanons on the fly, and embrace messiness over planning or closure (e.g., the long, meandering Q&A about mochuu and mozu such as “i. i think i haven't done this yet...? handwriting all my answers to look busy nyes”). Overall, an INFP fits: a highly emotional, fantasy‑driven inner world, strong attachment to fictional relationships, introspective self‑loathing mixed with idealization of “wife/oshi,” and a very spontaneous, unstructured tweeting style.
Some pickup lines for you
- You keep calling him ‘wife’ and ‘wifesama’, but have you considered taking a brief break from missing Bustafellows mozu and temporarily upgrading me to ‘stupid wife (affectionate)’ instead?
- You said you’re ‘teeny tiny’ and almost 30cm shorter—perfect height difference for me to be your personal ‘イケメン回転寿司’, circling back to you with kiss refills every time you giggle in public about it.
- You talked about postponing your own ‘sequel update’ and surviving the ominous bells; if enduring all that still left you enough energy to handwrite Mochuu lore threads, I’d like to respectfully apply for the role of your co-author in the next domestic sticky-note AU.
- You stayed up watching the countdown relay stream till your head hurt, yelling about how talented your oshi is and how THIS YAOIER has yaoi in their eyes—what if, next New Year’s, we watch together and you realize the real toxic BL was the friends-to-lovers arc we accidentally started?
- You joked about needing to kill yourself because of how much you love JJ, Mary Jane, and that one scene that makes your hands shake; allow me to propose a safer alternative: you just collapse dramatically into my arms instead while we scream ‘tskr wifesama i wub u’ at each other about our faves.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Part-time eeper, full-time overthinker. Once burned water while daydreaming about 2D husbands. JRPGs, BL, and too many sticky notes on my desk.– @_xalfie
Your signature cocktail
Eeberdream Anemia Fizz
This sparkling, slightly chaotic drink is sweet and fizzy on the surface but a bit overwhelming underneath—just like the way they spiral between wife-adoration and existential dread in posts like “my wife... i miss my wife.......” and “i don't want anything i just want to die”. Lychee liqueur is soft and floral, capturing their tender, dreamy side and the way they gush over characters and music such as “oshi so talented wadafak.....”. The blue curaçao splash mirrors their dramatic, yaoi-induced meltdowns and oshi obsession in tweets like “THIS YAOIER ISTG” and “this is the kind of toxic yaoi the masses yearn for holy Fuck”. Calpico/yogurt soda adds a tangy comfort that stands in for their vulnerable, self-deprecating side—tiny and tired, as in “almost 30cm 😞 im teeny tiny” and their anemia joke in “i think my anemia is going to get about x8362810292763 times worse tmr 🩵 i love this for me”. The bright yuzu soda keeps it lively and hyper, reminiscent of their capslocked flailing like “THAT'S WIFE!!!!! THAT'S MY WIFE LOOK AT HIM GO!!!!!!!”. Finally, the silver glitter and tiny bell charm nod to their ominous internal drama in “the Ominous Bells are tolling. it's only a matter of time” and the "bell free" saga in “bell free 🔕🔕🔕”, turning all that angst into something pretty and a little unhinged in a glass.
Your Hogwarts House
Ravenclaw
Their timeline is dominated by obsessive, analytical interest in stories, characters, and dynamics, which fits Ravenclaw’s curiosity and love of thinking. They build elaborate headcanons and AUs, like when they unpack character traits and relationship dynamics in long chains such as “eto. they stupid kyaaa more srs answer they're both ppl who don't have the most solid grasp on their humanity but try their best to understand more with the one person who both won't judge them and will also go along with their ideas no matter how 'silly' it may sound to others” and “im stupid i didn't realize that meant au Erm. anyway boarding school au? like what if they met earlier? :3”. They also clearly enjoy dissecting character development and specific scenes, as in “less reserved in general (mostly) not afraid to ask for help from others happier (anyone hear the ominous bells ringing? no? just me?)” and “the fact that chuu doesn't know how to do a lot of things that are 'common sense'”, which shows a reflective, analytical mindset rather than just pure emotional stanning. Their humor is witty and self-aware—“if you ever see me giggling in public just know i thought of イケメン回転寿司 again” and “i was about to say something but i forgor um”—and their use of multilingual wordplay and puns, like “happy bassaday ❤️ please get the pun please pleas please”, points to a love of language and cleverness. While there is clear emotional intensity and loyalty to their “wife” and oshi, the dominant pattern is an introspective, imaginative, and analysis-heavy way of engaging with media and self, which is quintessentially Ravenclaw rather than the more outwardly driven traits of Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, or Slytherin.
Your movie
Your song
you should see me in a crown - Billie Eilish
Billie Eilish’s you should see me in a crown fits them because it mixes dramatic, dark self-talk with a playful, almost theatrical edge, which matches how they casually tweet about death and self-destruction while still sounding energetic and online-brained, like “i don't want anything i just want to die” and “I NEED TO KILL MYSELF”. The song’s persona feels small but dangerous and intense, echoing their own "teeny tiny" but emotionally huge vibe in “almost 30cm 😞 im teeny tiny”. Lyrically, the track’s blend of vulnerability and menace mirrors their oscillation between genuine distress about their environment in “i need to kill myself i hate being in this house” and hyperbolic, fandom-fueled meltdowns like “THIS YAOIER ISTG”. At the same time, the confident, obsessive tone of the chorus resonates with the way they fixate lovingly on their fictional "wife" and oshi, as in “THAT'S WIFE!!!!! THAT'S MY WIFE LOOK AT HIM GO!!!!!!!”. Overall, the song captures their mix of dark humor, intense parasocial affection, and performative emotional spiraling.
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