
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
The account’s chaotic salesman persona and constant desperation for attention and ‘deals’ strongly resemble Gil Gunderson, the chronically unlucky salesman from The Simpsons. Like Gil, this user presents themselves as a hard-luck hustler, calling themself “EV3RY BUDDY 'S FAVORITE Number 1 Rated Salesman1997” in their bio while constantly scrambling for validation and opportunities. Their frantic energy and over-the-top sales patter show in posts like “THANKS! ! THIS IS THE ONLY [Nice One!] IN MY [[Mail]]!! HOPE THAT [Kromer] COMES THROUGH SOON !!! !!!!!! !”, which echo Gil’s needy gratitude for any small bit of good news. The sense of being pushed around by circumstances and rivals appears in “I BREAK A LEG! AND I COME BACK TO THIS? !? ... I BUILT MY [[Business]] FROM THE [Underground] UP AND YOU JUST GOT IT ALL FROM THAT $#£@ [[Queen]]!”, mirroring Gil’s constant lamenting about losing deals and being undercut. Even their complaints about scams and bad products, such as “REMEMBER [Every Body] DON'T BUY THIS!!! THIS IS N'T [Quality Product]...”, fit Gil’s role as the perpetually struggling salesman trying (and failing) to stay on top in a world that keeps passing him by.

Your MBTI personality Type
They read as an extrovert (E): the whole account is loud, performative, and attention‑seeking, leaning into the salesman persona and constantly addressing an audience (“HEY EVERY !!!” in “HEY EVERY !!! I'M [Nice And Pretty] SURE THE LATEST [Customer] IS A [[Robotics Industry]]…”) and celebrating follower counts and interactions (“HEAR THANKS FOR 97 FOLLOWERS! IT WAS SUCH A GREAT YEAR.”). Their style is clearly intuitive (N): lots of metaphor, in‑jokes, and conceptual brackets instead of literal description, such as “THIS IS WHAT I MEAN BY ' I USED TO BE NOTHING BUT THE E_MAIL GUY, NOW I'M THE [[It Burns! Ow! Stop! Help Me! It Burns!]] GUY!'” and surreal trend riffs like “#E563eee2 ! NOW THAT'S ONE [[BIG SHOT!!!!!]] TREND!”. They lean feeling (F) because even when being critical, the focus is on emotional reaction and interpersonal drama rather than structured logic (e.g., “REMEMBER [Every Body] DON'T BUY THIS!!! THIS IS N'T [Quality Product] IS NEITHER [Mine] NOR [[Quality]]!!” and the boundary‑setting, values‑based OOC note “Hi guys please can you NOT send me gimmicks about Jauddie… I am fully aware…”). Finally, they appear perceiving (P) rather than structured and planful: posts bounce between topics, trends, and sudden emotional bursts (e.g., the chaotic keysmash “NWJDOIFHENDKLXPPWLW…”), and they openly mention improvising the voice and struggling with consistent brackets (“trying to do spamrons brackets right can be annoying sometimes…”). Overall, the energetic, improvisational, idea‑driven, emotionally expressive style fits ENFP best.

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Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Deltarune Spamton RP • Former “email guy,” now proudly the It Burns Guy™ • Once got covered in expanding foam and still made the sale.– @BIGSHOTDEALS_97

Your signature cocktail
The Electric blue curaçao shot (served flaming) captures their glitchy, over-the-top salesman energy and meme chaos, like yelling about trends in “#E563eee2 ! NOW THAT'S ONE [[BIG SHOT!!!!!]] TREND!”. The Spiced cinnamon cola reduction nods to their nostalgic, 90s-esque, bargain-bin ad-man vibes and the self-declared brand of being [[NUMBER 1 RATED SALESMAN 1997]] in “IM [[NUMBER 1 RATED SALESMAN 1997]] !! I BUILT MY [[Business]] FROM THE [Underground] UP”. The Sour citrus mix with popping candy rim mirrors their sharp, snappy callout posts and sudden mood swings, like warning followers in “REMEMBER [Every Body] DON'T BUY THIS!!! THIS IS N'T [Quality Product]” and “READ THIS EVERYONE! DO NOT WATCH [Spamverse]”. A slow-melting espresso ice cube represents the unexpectedly thoughtful, meta side behind the bit, as seen when they drop character to talk about RP and writing in “// just gonna say because I keep forgetting if I talk normally… it's ooc” and “// trying to do spamrons brackets right can be annoying sometimes”. Finally, the edible silver glitter and tiny paper coupon labeled "2 For 1 Deal" embody their bargain-hawking, art-ticket-loving huckster persona, sparkling like their thanks in “THANK YOU FOR THE [Art Gallery Tickets 2 For 1 Deal]!!!!” and their constant chase for that elusive [Kromer] in “I REACHED FOR MY [Kromer] NO [Kromer]”. This cocktail is strong, chaotic, a bit sour, and flashy as hell—exactly the kind of drink a homemade-message-site salesman would try to upsell you on while shouting HEY EVERY !! from your notification tab.

Your Hogwarts House
This account’s defining traits are ambition, rivalry, and a sharp sense of self‑interest, all hallmarks of Slytherin. They consistently frame themselves as a striver and top competitor, calling themselves [[NUMBER 1 RATED SALESMAN 1997]] and boasting about having “BUILT MY [[Business]] FROM THE [Underground] UP” in “I M NOT [Going, Going, Gone!] A [Take The Deal?] !! IM [[NUMBER 1 RATED SALESMAN 1997]] !! I BUILT MY [[Business]] FROM THE [Underground] UP AND YOU JUST GOT IT ALL FROM THAT $#£@ [[Queen]]!”. Their tone is often aggressive and competitive, as when they blame another user for the whole platform’s issues in “IT'S @ITSTVT1ME FAULT [[X, The Everything App]] IS DOWN!”, and they show a willingness to publicly denounce perceived rivals or threats, like in “REMEMBER [Every Body] DON'T BUY THIS!!! THIS IS N'T [Quality Product] IS NEITHER [Mine] NOR [[Quality]]!!”. Even their complaints have a self‑preservation angle, such as warning followers away from certain media in “READ THIS EVERYONE! DO NOT WATCH [Spamverse]”, which reads more like guarding their own brand and boundaries than an altruistic PSA. While they show flashes of humor and creativity, the consistent through‑line is a cunning, status‑conscious persona focused on winning, protecting their turf, and turning every situation into a deal—very much in line with Slytherin values.

Your movie

Your song
Their whole persona is chaotic, dramatic, and slightly unhinged, which fits the anxious, spiraling energy of Mr. Brightside. They constantly react to online drama and perceived slights, like when they post in all-caps outrage at content on their feed: “I WAS. GOING TO [[Like, Comment And Subscribe]] SOMETHING… BUT! THE $!?! [[Sponge]] WHO POSTED IT!… GET AWAY! OFF MY [[X, The Everything App]]”. They’re hyper-aware of fandom and interpersonal conflicts, as seen when they say “please can you NOT send me gimmicks about Jauddie. I am fully aware of everything that's happened”, mirroring the song’s obsessive overthinking. The persona is also about being a fallen salesman trying to claw back status—“IM [[NUMBER 1 RATED SALESMAN 1997]] !! I BUILT MY [[Business]] FROM THE [Underground] UP AND YOU JUST GOT IT ALL FROM THAT $#£@ [[Queen]]!”—which parallels the song’s bitter mix of bravado and vulnerability. The glitchy, frantic style of tweeting, like “NWJDOIFHENDKLXPPWLW. NDJXKEOEPLFNFMLSUEOEPOE. DIEOLWNFMVPAPOWBF FKJE? JITCNK!”, matches the song’s feeling of a mind racing out of control while trying to keep up a confident front.

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BIGSHOTDEALS_97
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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