
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
This user most closely matches Bart Simpson, with a mix of chaotic humor, vulgarity, and rebelliousness. They lean into crude, outrageous jokes like “Call me a pig the way I be shitting and consuming SLOP #WOKELIBERALISHEREMAMA” and “i lik holding in my pee. whos with me 😂”, echoing Bart’s gross-out, boundary-pushing sense of humor. Their hostility toward judgmental people — “‘aren't you too old to like that’ GO SUCK MY DICK LOSER” — mirrors Bart’s instinct to tell authority and normies to shove it. At the same time, they show flashes of vulnerability and self-deprecation, like “The thought of becoming a lolcow is my worst fear in life” and “no friends no future no hope JUST ME AND MY LEFT HAND BOIIIIIII”, which matches Bart’s hidden insecurity beneath the clowning. Their fondness for edgy fandom jokes and hyperbolic reactions — “HOLY YEARNER” and “OH MY GOD TEHAHAHAHAHA 😭😭” — further reflects Bart’s dramatic, attention-grabbing personality.

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Frankie ✩‧ | Alternian creature of the internet. Draws through migraines, survives on memes & fanart. Once got handed a razor in geography class.– @BjorksVocals

Your signature cocktail
This chaotic little beast is strong and a bit unhinged, just like someone who proudly declares they’re “shitting and consuming SLOP #WOKELIBERALISHEREMAMA” in their bio. The overproof rum matches their loud, unfiltered intensity and dramatic posts like “no friends no future no hope JUST ME AND MY LEFT HAND BOIIIIIII”. Sour cherry liqueur brings a sweet-but-biting edge, reflecting posts where they’re both loving and feral, like “the most pure version of love 💝” versus “'aren't you too old to like that' GO SUCK MY DICK LOSER”. Grapefruit juice adds bitterness for their migraine, relapse mentions, and general suffering energy, echoing “OUGHH I HAVE A MASSIVE MIGRAINE” and the razor story in “because I was emo”. An absinthe rinse nods to their weird, artsy, fandom-brainposting side, like the Homestuck and ship content in “rosemary my beloved” and their #happytwt drawing in “whenever I feel like im going to relapse I like to draw shit like this”. Finally, edible glitter with a chili-salt rim captures their mix of #BeKind softness and sharp callout energy, seen when they say “not only u a pedophile but u also have shit TASTE LMFAOOOO PICK AN ISSUE” while still tweeting sparkly joy like “ts is how my soul looks like #BeKind #happytwt”.

Your Hogwarts House
The strongest throughline in Frankie’s tweets is blunt bravado and a readiness to confront people, which is very Gryffindor. They openly mock and challenge others’ behavior, as in calling someone out with “not only u a pedophile but u also have shit TASTE LMFAOOOO PICK AN ISSUE” and “homie it's not too late to delete this”, showing a willingness to stand up aggressively for what they think is right. Their reaction to age-shaming interests, “'aren't you too old to like that' GO SUCK MY DICK LOSER”, is classic Gryffindor defiance: proud, confrontational, and unapologetic. Even their humor has an impulsive, slightly self-destructive edge, like “i lik holding in my pee. whos with me 😂” and the dramatic self-deprecation in “no friends no future no hope JUST ME AND MY LEFT HAND BOIIIIIII”, which fits the house’s flair for dramatics. While there are hints of creativity and self-reflection in art-related tweets like “whenever I feel like im going to relapse I like to draw shit like this”, the predominant traits are boldness, emotional intensity, and confrontational courage—hallmarks of a modern, very online Gryffindor.

Your movie

Your song
The best fit for @BjorksVocals is “Teen Idle” by MARINA, because it captures a mix of dark humor, self-deprecation, and yearning that runs through their tweets. Their bio, “Call me a pig the way I be shitting and consuming SLOP #WOKELIBERALISHEREMAMA,” mirrors the song’s messy, hyper-self-aware tone about being a disillusioned youth. Tweets like “no friends no future no hope JUST ME AND MY LEFT HAND BOIIIIIII” match the song’s themes of loneliness, frustration, and joking about unhealthy coping mechanisms. The fear of public humiliation in “The thought of becoming a lolcow is my worst fear in life” echoes the song’s anxiety about how one is perceived. Even their use of fandom/ship language in “rosemary my beloved” and emotional art like “whenever I feel like im going to relapse I like to draw shit like this” line up with Teen Idle’s intensely online, dramatic, yet sincere exploration of teen/young adult angst.

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BjorksVocals
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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