
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
This account mixes grumpiness, affection, and chaotic humor in a very Homer-like way: they complain about stress and bad moods while still being oddly endearing, as in “Bom ano novo pra quem? Dia estressante da miséria.”. Like Homer with Marge, they’re loudly possessive and romantic about their partners, calling them “meus namorados” and saying things like “Meu homem, só divido com o Diabo.”. They present themselves as a simple person who wants small pleasures, e.g. “Sou um homem simples que não quer guerra com ninguém, apenas jogar sinuca com alguém”, which mirrors Homer’s love of basic comforts (beer, TV, bowling). The sarcastic, sometimes cranky tone — “Nenhum dos dois, arrume algo de útil para fazer.” — sits right alongside unexpectedly sweet gestures like celebrating a month with their partners in “Oficialmente faz um mês desde que estou junto dos amores da minha vida.”. All of this paints them as a chaotic but loving, blunt yet soft-hearted figure, much like Homer at his best (and worst).

Your MBTI personality Type
They lean Extrovert: they constantly seek interaction, ask followers how they are, and invite people into calls and games, e.g. “Boss noite, entrem aqui. (Com certeza não estou sendo ameaçado de faca)” and “Faz tempo desde que não apareço aqui pra conversar, criei um tell pra quem quiser interagir.”. Their focus is concrete and sensory, fitting Sensing: they talk about heat, coffee, clothes, hair colors and photos, like “Hoje tá quente até pra mim.” and “Café gelado é pros fracos, bom mesmo é tomar um café queimando no calor.”. They come across as emotionally expressive and relationship‑oriented, fitting Feeling: they gush about their partners and friends in tweets such as “Para aqueles que não sabem, eu amo esses dois mais que tudo.” and “Meus namorados são realmente as pessoas mais românticas que existem.”, while their blunt jokes (“Nenhum dos dois, arrume algo de útil para fazer.”) are still rooted in social playfulness, not detached logic. On the Perceiving side, they are spontaneous and flexible, often acting on the moment and embracing chaos rather than rigid planning, as in “Não me cobrem nada, hoje eu não respondo por mim.” and “Que insônia horrível, isso não é vida não”, with no sense of strict schedules or structure. Taken together—high social energy, focus on present sensory experiences, emotionally warm and dramatic tone, and improvisational lifestyle—ESFP is the best fit.

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Your new Twitter bio
Part-time cangaceiro, full-time lover of my boyfriends, hot coffee & Psikolera. Once got dragged into a stranger’s DMs about abortion mid-RP thread.– @C0RlSC0

Your signature cocktail
This cocktail starts with cachaça infused with roasted coffee beans, a nod to their unapologetic hot-coffee-in-the-heat energy from “Café gelado é pros fracos, bom mesmo é tomar um café queimando no calor.”, giving the drink both Brazilian roots and stubborn intensity. The spicy mango chili syrup mirrors their fiery, regional sass and anti-imperialist bite in “Como cangaceiro eu quero dizer que também não apoio nenhum imperialismo e muito menos o americano. Pau no cu dos miseráveis unidos.”. A short, punchy dose of cold-brew concentrate represents their insomnia and relentless vibe from “Que insônia horrível, isso não é vida não”, keeping the drink strong and wired. Lime juice cuts through with brightness, capturing the tenderness and romantic side they show when talking about their partners in “Oficialmente faz um mês desde que estou junto dos amores da minha vida. @DV0RE @fuckalorssz”. Finally, crushed ice and a splash of sparkling water add a refreshing, playful lift that fits their joking, dramatic flair in lines like “Não me cobrem nada, hoje eu não respondo por mim.”, making the whole thing a chaotic but charming high-voltage mix.

Your Hogwarts House
They consistently show a sharp, self-assured personality and a willingness to take strong stances, which aligns closely with Slytherin. Their tweet rejecting imperialism — “Como cangaceiro eu quero dizer que também não apoio nenhum imperialismo e muito menos o americano. Pau no cu dos miseráveis unidos.” — shows bold conviction and a readiness to speak harsh truths rather than stay neutral. There’s also a strong sense of possessiveness and pride in their relationships, as seen in “Meu homem, só divido com o Diabo.” and “A cintura do Diabo é de 58 centímetros, e por falar no Juan, ele está compromissado. Tirem o olho.”, which reflects Slytherin’s intense loyalty to their own circle and protective instinct. Their dry, cutting responses — like “Nenhum dos dois, arrume algo de útil para fazer.” — and comfort with being a bit intimidating show social confidence and a readiness to use sharp wit as a tool. While they clearly care deeply for their partners and friends, the dominant traits are pride, intensity, and a combative, no-nonsense way of defending what’s theirs, all strongly characteristic of Slytherin rather than the softer ethos of Hufflepuff or the more cerebral focus of Ravenclaw.

Your movie

Your song
A fitting song for them is “bad guy” because they constantly play with the image of being dangerous, snarky, and a little wicked while clearly caring deeply about people. Their humor and fake-threatening aura show up when they say things like “Como cangaceiro eu quero dizer que também não apoio nenhum imperialismo e muito menos o americano. Pau no cu dos miseráveis unidos.” and “Quem que deixou essa miséria sair do esgoto?”, which matches the song’s tongue‑in‑cheek villainy. The possessive, teasing love in “Meu homem, só divido com o Diabo.” and “Meu e do diabo, apenas nosso.” echoes the song’s flirtatious, slightly dark relationship energy. They present themselves as blunt and not to be messed with — for instance, answering “Nenhum dos dois, arrume algo de útil para fazer.” — but their timeline is full of affection for their partners and friends, just like bad guy mixes menace with playfulness. Overall, their cangaceiro bravado, devilish jokes, and romantic loyalty line up well with the ironic ‘I’m the bad type’ persona of the song.

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