Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Emotionally honest: Openly describes intense feelings, like anxiety and emptiness in “school makes me feel sick, i go to a smaller school but the amount of people in it still make me anxious, i throw up before and after pretty much everyday” and “somedays you just wake up and everything feels empty and pointless”.
- Self-aware: Reflects on their patterns, such as recognizing episodes and emotional shifts in “i hate my episodes where i feel everything… i rather the times where i feel nothing” and long-term issues in “since 9 ive been the way i am… i've gotten better at hiding everything is all really”.
- Protective loyal: Shows strong protectiveness toward their partner in “we got that love the crazy kind, i am his and he is mine” and “não estou com ciúmes estou apenas protegendo o que é meu, e o que é meu não deve ser tocado”.
- Candid reflective: Willing to examine morally uncomfortable behavior, like in “i don't really feel guilt for the things ive done to people… showing my old fp gore… i was trying to scare her into not leaving me i think” and “i don't fear rejection, i fear what'll do to avoid it”.
- Dark humorist: Uses blunt, edgy humor to express distress, such as “' you just want attention! ' .. yeah i do and what.” and the sarcastic description of news avoidance in “i get alot of shit for not being educated on like current world affairs… yeah no not gonna happen”.
Weaknesses:
- Self-destructive: Expresses active desire for self-harm and chaos in “Can we please just fucking spiral? 'Cause its all i wanna do. Self destruction's all i know, its all im going to pursue.” and detailed cutting struggles in “Im incapable of cutting deep enough… its driving me insane”.
- Body hatred: Shows extreme disgust toward their body in “my body makes me feel sick… he shouldn't have to look at or deal with something so disgusting” and intense weight fixation in “is that really what i look like man i need to lose weight fucking immediately”.
- Abandonment fear: Describes obsessive fear of being left in “i don't hide how extreme my obession is… if i scared him and he left, i'd kill myself” and jealousy of others in “i hate all his freinds… i can't help but worry that he will leave me for them”.
- Manipulative tendencies: Acknowledges harmful attempts to control others, such as “the worst thing was showing my old fp gore… i was trying to scare her into not leaving me i think” and fear of their own actions in “i don't fear rejection, i fear what'll do to avoid it”.
- Substance dependence: Admits a strong pill addiction and misaligned priorities in “theres only one thing i'd pick over him and that's my pills… i think this really shows me how bad it actually is”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
The best match is Lisa Simpson, specifically a much darker, more self-critical version of her. Like Lisa, this user is intensely introspective and analytical about their own mind, writing things like “i don't think i really ever got better, since 9 ive been the way i am, sure i've changed over the years but the basis is the same” and “i get alot of shit for not being educated on like current world affairs and news stuff but i have to block every news site i can find because i know very well that i will jump to the worst situation and have a episode”, which echoes Lisa’s tendency to overthink and get overwhelmed. Their heightened sensitivity to other people and relationships, such as “i don't hide how extreme my obession is because im ashamed of it, i hide it because if i scared him and he left, i'd kill myself” and “i don't really know how to explain that i hate all his freinds... i still hate them because i can't help but worry that he will leave me for them”, reflects Lisa’s fear of abandonment and intense attachment, pushed to an extreme. Their body image struggles and feeling misunderstood by family, like “my body makes me feel sick, the fact he's seen any part of me digusts me” and “My dad ' 90% of girls your age have eating disorders ' ... first off im not a girl”, parallel Lisa’s frequent clashes with her parents and society over identity and values. While Lisa in the show is more outwardly functional and idealistic, the underlying traits of hyper-awareness, emotional intensity, and feeling out of place in the world line up most closely with this user.
Your MBTI personality Type
ISFP
They lean strongly introverted: their struggles with social interaction and school anxiety, like “school makes me feel sick, i go to a smaller school but the amount of people in it still make me anxious, i throw up before and after pretty much everyday” and “i have social anxiety… i'll throw up before and after every social interaction”, show that being around people is draining rather than energizing. Their focus is very concrete and body-oriented, pointing to Sensing: they talk about weight numbers and appearance in detail, as in “sometimes i forget that the average non disordered person doesn't actually understand weight… these numbers don't actually mean that much to them, they just see big and small” and “body check i guess, i dont take pictures often but i love my hip bones here so.”. They prioritize emotional experience and attachment over logic, fitting Feeling: their obsession with their partner and fear of abandonment in “i don't hide how extreme my obession is because im ashamed of it, i hide it because if i scared him and he left, i'd kill myself” and “i don't fear rejection, i fear what'll do to avoid it” shows decisions driven by feelings and bonds. The way they tweet is spontaneous, raw, and unstructured, suggesting Perceiving: they describe themselves as someone who spirals and self-destructs rather than plans, e.g. “Can we please just fucking spiral? 'Cause its all i wanna do. Self destruction's all i know, its all im going to pursue.”, and they mention episodes and shifting states rather than schedules or long-term structure. Overall, an emotionally intense, highly sensitive, concrete, and impulsive style is most consistent with ISFP.
Some pickup lines for you
- "Army of two" huh? Lucky for you I major in being unhealthily devoted to one person, so if you need a co‑captain for that crazy kind of love, I already signed the enlistment papers.
- You said people just see "big and small" when it comes to weight — good news, the only numbers I care about are 11/8: your following/follower ratio, because I’m trying to be the 9th follower who actually *gets* you.
- You hate when people say you look "healthier," so I’m not gonna say that. I’m just gonna say: that hip-bone body check pic? You look like a whole main character who deserves someone hyping them up, not tearing them down.
- You said you block news sites because you spiral — honestly, same, but if doomscrolling ever sneaks through, we could trade headlines like: "Local menace and their favorite person caught being disgustingly obsessed with each other. More at 11."
- You wrote "i don't fear rejection, i fear what i'll do to avoid it" — deal: I won’t reject you, you don’t have to do anything wild, and we can just spiral together in peace like a mutually assured obsession pact.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Cal | navigating school, anxiety & recovery arcs | professional overthinker, part-time lyric quoter | once blocked news sites for mental health homework– @calrexie
Your signature cocktail
Army of Two-Tini
The Army of Two-Tini is strong and volatile, built on overproof dark rum for that chaotic, self-destructive edge, echoing their line about craving collapse: “Can we please just fucking spiral? 'Cause its all i wanna do. Self destruction's all i know, its all im going to pursue.”. A shot of blackcurrant liqueur brings intense sweetness and fixation, mirroring their obsessive attachment: “i don't hide how extreme my obession is because im ashamed of it, i hide it because if i scared him and he left, i'd kill myself” and the possessiveness in “não estou com ciúmes estou apenas protegendo o que é meu, e o que é meu não deve ser tocado”. Grapefruit juice adds a bitter bite and acidity for their body-image pain and disgust: “my body makes me feel sick, the fact he's seen any part of me digusts me.” and the distress over weight and comments in “people around me have been mentioning i look healthier far too often, i've gained weight, i already feel disgusted with myself”. Tonic water lightens it just enough, like the flashes of affection in “we got that love the crazy kind, i am his and he is mine.” and their shy pride in “Uhh.. body check i guess, i dont take pictures often but i love my hip bones here so.”. Finally, an activated charcoal sugar rim makes it look dark and dramatic, a nod to their fascination with scars and gore and their admission: “anyone else obssessed with someones scars and cuts or am i just a freak” and “i don't think i really ever got better… i've gotten better at hiding everything is all really”.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Cal’s tweets show intense attachment, possessiveness, and a focus on keeping what they see as theirs, which aligns strongly with Slytherin traits of resourcefulness and self‑preservation. They openly admit to manipulative behavior in relationships, describing how they once showed an old favorite person gore to keep her from leaving: “i think the worst thing was showing my old fp gore, she had never seen it before, i was trying to scare her into not leaving me i think”. Their view of relationships is deeply territorial and protective, as in: “não estou com ciúmes estou apenas protegendo o que é meu, e o que é meu não deve ser tocado”. They also display a ruthless clarity about morality and mental illness, challenging comforting narratives with: “disordered people arent always victims”, which suggests a willingness to confront uncomfortable truths rather than seek approval. Finally, the fear of abandonment and what they’d do to avoid it—“i don't fear rejection, i fear what'll do to avoid it”—shows a strategic, ends‑focused mindset that fits Slytherin more than the other houses.
Your movie
Your song
control - Halsey
A well‑suited song for @calrexie is “control” by Halsey, because it captures the feeling of being ruled by intense, chaotic emotions and a darker version of yourself. They talk about feeling unreal and detached from life, like in “I dont feel real how the fuck is life a real thing maybe its not”, which mirrors the song’s themes of dissociation and inner monsters. Their fixation on self-destruction shows in “Can we please just fucking spiral? 'Cause its all i wanna do. Self destruction's all i know, its all im going to pursue.”, closely aligning with the song’s portrayal of being consumed by destructive impulses. The obsessive, fearful attachment to their partner in “i don't hide how extreme my obession is because im ashamed of it, i hide it because if i scared him and he left, i'd kill myself” and “i don't fear rejection, i fear what'll do to avoid it” fits the lyrics about losing control over yourself and your relationships. Their long-term sense of being fundamentally broken, expressed in “i don't think i really ever got better, since 9 ive been the way i am… i've gotten better at hiding everything is all really”, echoes the song’s confession of being haunted by something inside that never really goes away.
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