Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Culinary Skill: Operates the Whisk&Wander bakery and produces complex items like macarons.
- Resourcefulness: Prefers modding an old mp3 player and fixing bakery machinery herself to save money.
- Generosity: Offers increased allowances to friends and provides steep discounts during community events.
- Self-Awareness: Recognizes when she is being unprofessional and issues public apologies for her outbursts.
- Adaptability: Pivots her business plan when suppliers dip or when she needs to rebrand.
Weaknesses:
- Impulse Control: Prone to aggressive social media outbursts, including telling users to “KILLLYOIRESELF”.
- Unprofessional Conduct: Arbitrarily bans couples or closes the shop simply because she “doesn't feel like it”.
- Poor Memory: Frequently forgets why she ordered supplies or feels she has forgotten important tasks.
- Cynicism: Expresses a deep disdain for the economy and describes capitalism as a joke.
- Social Aggression: Uses slurs and openly admits to hating people on her timeline.
Your Simpsons character
Moe Szyslak
Like Moe, Cherry Pie is a cynical small-business owner whose life is a cycle of equipment failure and general misery, frequently posting things like “no longer want to bake. i want to pass now ❤️”. They share a short-tempered, aggressive social media presence, seen when they abruptly tell people “KILLLYOIRESELF” or lash out at customers with “okay its july you f slurs leave”. Despite the hostility, there is a clear sense of exhaustion with their surroundings, lamenting that “is the economy shit again or do we need more international holidays”. Ultimately, both characters balance running a public establishment while being openly “sore and sad” and desperate to be “dug out of the trenches.”
Your MBTI personality Type
ISTP
Cherry Pie demonstrates Introversion (I) through a preference for solitary work and home comforts, missing their “old couch” and valuing time alone. Their Sensing (S) and Thinking (T) traits are evident in their mechanical focus and blunt communication style, such as when they “tamper with the oven” to fix machinery or use harsh language like “KILLLYOIRESELF” when annoyed. The Perceiving (P) preference is highlighted by a lack of planning and a reactive nature, often closing the bakery spontaneously because they “don't feel like” opening or because they simply “no longer want to bake”. Overall, they are a practical, hands-on individual who prioritizes their own immediate needs and technical interests over social conventions.
Some pickup lines for you
- Are you a high-tech oven? Because I’d love to come over during your renovation week and help you 'tamper' with the machinery.
- I heard you’re looking for a better supplier—I can't offer almond flour, but I promise I'll never 'dip' on you for six weeks.
- Is your bakery open? Because I’m willing to French kiss a buddy just to get a 50% discount on you.
- Forget the silicone caulking and the substandard tech; I think the only thing your kitchen is missing is me on the register duty.
- You can stop digging through storage for that old MP3 player, because you’ve been on repeat in my head all day.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Proprietor of Whisk & Wander. I specialize in macarons and fixing the oven Laser broke. No couples on Valentine’s Day and please stop asking about my hands.– @cheripie314
Your signature cocktail
The Caulking & Chaos Spritz
This cocktail captures Cherry Pie’s chaotic energy, starting with a smoky Mezcal base to honor her Inphernal heritage and the time she spent “tampering with the oven”. The bitter cherry liqueur reflects her sharp tongue and tendency to tell people to “KILLLYOIRESELF”, while a dollop of condensed milk adds a texture as thick as the sealant she obsessed over when she tweeted, “I HATE CAULKING”. Finally, edible silver glitter is stirred in to represent the tech-modding side of a baker who would rather be “modding my old one” than buying a new MP3 player. It’s a bitter, experimental drink perfect for someone who claims, “not me! i am sane”.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Cherry Pie exhibits classic Slytherin traits of self-preservation and resourcefulness, specifically seen in her decision to close the bakery whenever she “doesn't feel like it” or to avoid capitalism, which she calls “a joke”. Her ambition is directed toward her own comfort and branding, showing a cunning edge when she bans couples from her shop during Valentine's Day because she was “bored”. She prioritizes her own needs over others, openly stating “i really dont care” and displaying a sharp, sometimes abrasive leadership style when she tells people to “lock the fuck in”. This combination of self-interest, bluntness, and the desire to “rebrand” for her own benefit aligns her firmly with the house of ambition.
Your movie
Your song
Kitchen Light - Xana
The song's blend of domestic exhaustion and chaotic independence perfectly matches Cherry Pie’s life as a struggling bakery owner who claims “i am sane” while clearly spiraling. The lyrics reflect her tendency to mask deep-seated stress with humor, seen when she admits “i am sore and sad” but then immediately pivots to erratic behavior like banning couples or “telling people to 'kill themselves'” on her business account. Her complicated relationship with her former life in Blackrock and her physical ailments, like when her “joints ache and my hands are FUCKKEDD”, echo the song's themes of feeling worn down by one's own environment. Ultimately, the song captures the vibe of someone trying to keep their head above water while their “ovens shouldnt be breaking in the middle of service” and their mental health is visibly fraying.
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