cityofcaterpie
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In a relationship:
Politically:
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Authentic: Evan's tweets are brutally honest — for instance, 'i don't want to go to school or do anything today i hate myself and want to die' — he doesn't hide how he feels and that rawness is a strength in building trust.
- Musical Passion: He repeatedly proclaims 'DRUMS DRUMS DRUMS IM A DRUMMER' and loves the 'music scene', showing real dedication to practicing and participating in music culture.
- Resilient: Despite repeated setbacks — from job paperwork to parental obstacles over HRT — he keeps trying: 'i have applied. for many.' indicates persistence.
- Observant: His small cultural touches — 'trent reznor', 'POSTAL 2', and niche tattoos like 'richey edwards ... im getting it the MINUTE i turn 18' — show a keen eye for subcultural detail and taste curation.
- Caring: He speaks tenderly about his girlfriend and friends — 'i think she's really funny... she is there for me when i'm sad' — revealing emotional loyalty and warmth.
Weaknesses:
- Emotional Volatility: Frequent, extreme posts like 'i want to slit my wrists' and 'i want to cut myself' show intense mood swings that can make daily life unstable.
- Self-harm Risk: Repeated admissions such as 'i just cut myself with a rusty blade' and 'i want to cut myself but swim starts in a week' indicate ongoing dangerous coping behaviors.
- Dependency on Approval: He often frames recovery or behavior around others' recognition — 'my girlfriend wants me to recover but she doesn't acknowledge it unless i do' — which can tie self-worth to external validation.
- Impulsivity: Sudden decisions like 'i might have to shave my head and go bald' and 'i'm applying to work at dominos what the fuck' reveal spur-of-the-moment choices without full planning.
- Social Friction: Many tweets vent anger at peers/parents — 'i'm getting really sick of my parents not listening' and 'get a job WHEREEEE' — suggesting frequent conflict impacting relationships.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
Lisa is the show's thoughtful, musical, and morally intense kid — a great parallel for Evan. Both are musicians (Lisa with sax, Evan with drums), both feel out of step with their peers, and both hold strong, sometimes lonely convictions. Evan's lines like 'i think i've become progressively more introverted' and his steady devotion to music and niche culture mirror Lisa's introspective, principled persona.
Your MBTI personality Type
INFP
Introversion (I): Evan self-identifies trends toward solitude: 'i think i've become progressively more introverted as time has passed' and posts frequently about feeling overwhelmed by social situations. Intuition (N): his creative, abstract interests — 'architecture', 'trent reznor', 'POSTAL 2' and love for niche culture — show imaginative pattern-seeking. Feeling (F): he centers values and emotions in decision-making, confessing 'i don't want to go to school ... i hate myself' and framing recovery around relationships like 'my girlfriend wants me to recover'. Perceiving (P): his impulsive plans and shifting routines — 'i might have to shave my head' and alternating eating patterns — indicate flexibility over rigid structure. Together, these traits paint a tender, idealistic INFP teenager whose inner life powers his creative outlets.
Some pickup lines for you
- Hey, are you a drum solo? Because every time you tweet I feel my heart keeping time with you.
- If you were a game you'd be Postal 2 — chaotic, unforgettable, and the kind I'd play all night with you.
- I'd walk six minutes to get you a yogurt and then march three states for your playlist — how's that for devotion?
- Call me your bandmate: I'll hold the cymbals while you take the spotlight, then we can make pancakes at midnight.
- Are you Trent Reznor's secret collab? Because you hit me with a song I didn't know I needed.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
evan (he/him) • 15 • drummer & analogue kid • architecture + music nerd from WMass • t4t, bi • struggling but still creating — pancakes, Postal 2, and late-night photos • priv: @partyhard6669– @cityofcaterpie
Your signature cocktail
Pancake & Drumroll (mocktail)
The 'Pancake & Drumroll' is a non-alcoholic, cozy concoction that nods to Evan's earnest breakfasts and musical energy: 'the pancakes were really good yay' fuels the maple-and-oven warmth, while espresso mirrors the late-night gig energy behind 'DRUMS DRUMS DRUMS IM A DRUMMER'. Blueberry adds indie-vibe color (like album-art hues), and oat milk fits a youthful pantry. It's comforting, a little jittery, and ultimately made for someone who lives for small moments between big feelings.
Your Hogwarts House
Ravenclaw
Ravenclaw fits Evan because he values creative intelligence and niche cultural knowledge: he repeatedly engages with specific musical references like 'trent reznor' and lists interests such as 'architecture' and 'POSTAL 2', showing curiosity and eclectic taste. He also demonstrates introspective problem-solving in small ways (celebrating freeing something that 'took me 80 fucking years to get... out of its enclosure'). While he has strong emotional beats like a Hufflepuff might, his love for ideas, music lore, and technical interests in 'architectural engineering' point to Ravenclaw's blend of creativity and intellect.
Your movie
Your song
Hurt - Nine Inch Nails (Johnny Cash cover widely known)
Evan explicitly references Nine Inch Nails ('i can't say because ... nine inch nails'), and the bleak, reflective tone of 'Hurt' matches the repeated despair and self-reflection across his tweets like 'i fucking hate myself' and 'i want to slit my wrists'. The song's raw vulnerability aligns with his candid online voice and alternative music tastes.
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