
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
The user's constant expressions of hopelessness and self‑destruction, such as "I have like insane need to cut my throat" and "I want to die so fucking bad rn..", mirror Moe’s frequent depressive monologues and his recurring thoughts of ending his life. Like Moe, the user also fixates on being "just a machine" and feels worthless, evident in tweets like "I’m so useless" and "I don’t deserve to be alive", reflecting Moe’s low self‑esteem. Both display a fascination with dark, morbid themes – the user’s "Cleric’s Mortuary" bio, horror‑game references, and posts like "I’m a machine" echo Moe’s bar being a place of broken souls and his own death‑by‑drinks outlook. The user’s volatile emotional outbursts, for example "I’m so fucking ready…" and "I’ll kms I just want to skinny", are reminiscent of Moe’s erratic, angry outbursts when he feels rejected or isolated. Overall, the combination of chronic self‑harm ideation, depressive self‑talk, and an obsession with death best aligns with Moe Szyslak’s character in The Simpsons.

Your MBTI personality Type
The user’s heavy use of “I” and inward‑focused, emotionally charged statements such as "I don’t deserve to be alive" and "I want to die so fucking bad rn" show a strong Introverted orientation. Their emphasis on concrete, sensory details – for example, "I was spitting sm blood just a second ago" and "I feel like my flesh is rotting" – points to Sensing. The tone of the tweets is driven by personal feelings rather than logical analysis, evident in lines like "I'm so useless" and "I'm giving up hope." The posting pattern is erratic and spontaneous, with remarks such as "I'm locked in today" and "I might actually just disappear forever," indicating a Perceiving lifestyle. These combined traits align best with an ISFP personality type.

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Your new Twitter bio
Teen horror enthusiast, indie game reviewer & doodler. Survived a Silent Hill marathon during a blackout—no lights, just screams. #gaming #art– @ClericsMortuary

Your signature cocktail
The Bleeding Cog is a dark, smoky cocktail that mirrors the turbulent inner world of @ClericsMortuary. Charcoal‑infused vodka gives the drink an inky black base, echoing the tweet "Humans are such fragile machines" and the feeling of being "just a machine". Blood orange juice adds a vivid crimson swirl, a nod to the frantic "I have like insane need to cut my throat" and "I feel like my flesh is rotting" posts. A splash of absinthe brings a bitter, hallucinogenic edge, reminiscent of their love for horror and the line "I'm so fucking ready for theaters… Silent Hill?". Finally, smoked mezcal provides a lingering, ghostly smoke that captures the sense of "I might actually just disappear forever". Together the ingredients create a cocktail that’s both alluring and unsettling, just like the user’s online persona.

Your Hogwarts House
The user repeatedly emphasizes personal survival and self‑preservation, as seen in 'I have nothing to lose atp' and 'I might actually just disappear forever'. They also display a strong drive for personal goals and recognition, tweeting 'I'm so ready' and urging others 'Y'ALL BETTER FOLLOW MY FAVOOMF', which aligns with Slytherin’s ambition. Their focus on self‑interest over communal well‑being, such as wanting to be skinny ('I'll kms I just want to be skinny'), mirrors the house’s resourceful, self‑centered nature. Frequent expressions of frustration and a desire to control their own fate further underline a Slytherin mindset. Overall, the pattern of self‑focused ambition and self‑preservation points to Slytherin.

Your movie

Your song
The user repeatedly expresses self‑harm and hopelessness, echoing the raw pain in Nine Inch Nails' 'Hurt' – for example they tweet 'I have like insane need to cut my throat' and 'I'm going to kill myself like right now'. They also say 'I don't deserve to be alive' and 'I'm just a machine', mirroring the song's themes of self‑destruction and feeling like a broken entity. References to feeling like 'my flesh is rotting' and wanting to 'disappear forever' align with the lyric 'I hurt myself today, to see if I still feel'. The overall tone of despair, guilt, and yearning for release matches the emotional core of 'Hurt'.

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ClericsMortuary
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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