Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Affectionate friend: Shows strong care for friends like Gael and Mila, e.g. “toda vez que o gael me liga bêbado falando que me ama uma flor nasce no planeta” and multiple playful mentions of them.
- Supportive caretaker: Acts nurturing with people close to them, like “eu sempre to ensinando as coisas pro gael mds me sinto um paizao 🥹” and “to na casa da minha amiga recém parida fazendo sopa e bolo pra ela”.
- Humorous storyteller: Uses sarcasm and jokes to narrate daily life, such as “gosto de sair com a minha irmã e meu cunhado porque parece que sou o filho trans de um casal crente” and “‘se fazendo de pão pra levar linguiça’ KKKKKK”.
- Passionate fan: Expresses intense enthusiasm for interests like Yoongi and Ordem Paranormal, e.g. “meu menino apareceu meu deus eu to tao tao tao feliz” and “ORDEM PARANORMAL PORRA CARALHO”.
- Emotionally expressive: Openly shares feelings of joy, anxiety, and sadness, like “pensa num bicho ansioso” and “gente to muito chateado”.
Weaknesses:
- Harsh language: Frequently uses aggressive or violent phrasing toward others, e.g. “essa mila merece ser queimada em praça pública” and “homem cis é tao brocha deus me livre”.
- Impulsively reactive: Tweets in the heat of the moment about frustration, like “chega me deu vontade de vomitar” and “pelo amor de deus nao é possível vou afundar meu crânio no chao”.
- Negative self-talk: Comments that lean into self-deprecation or exhaustion, such as “to meio 🧟♂️ hoje” and repeated complaints about being tired or overwhelmed.
- Conflict-prone: Publicly escalates drama with friends, joking but sharp, like “gael talarico morre cedo kkkkk” and “to cansado desse gael toda hora me difamando me tirando pra otario”.
- Work frustration: Shows strong dissatisfaction with job and authority, e.g. “esperando o momento certinho pra esculachar meu chefe” and “gente cansei de ser clt vou abandonar o serviço”.
Your Simpsons character
Bart Simpson
This user aligns most with Bart Simpson: chaotic, mischievous, affectionate with friends, and constantly joking even when complaining. They show a bratty, dramatic humor and love to stir things up, like calling their friend out in a mocking way in “to cansado desse gael toda hora me difamando me tirando pra otario” and threatening jokingly in “eu juro q se dessa vez eu n conseguir pegar esse ovo algum amigo meu morre”. There’s also that irreverent, almost rebellious tone toward authority and work in “esperando o momento certinho pra esculachar meu chefe” and “gente cansei de ser clt vou abandonar o serviço”. At the same time, under the loud attitude they’re very caring with their people, like feeling like a “dad” to a friend in “eu sempre to ensinando as coisas pro gael mds me sinto um paizao 🥹” and being the supportive friend cooking for someone who just gave birth in “imagina ter eu como amigo tipo eu to na casa da minha amiga recém parida fazendo sopa e bolo pra ela 😿😿”. The mix of clowning, swearing, melodrama, and hidden softness mirrors Bart’s troublemaker persona with a secretly big heart.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
They lean Extrovert (E): they constantly talk about friends, parties, and social chaos, like looking forward to beach and street parties in “e pensar que daqui uma semana nesse horário eu vou estar na praia ou em algum bloquinho enchendo a cara preenche meu coração” and being surrounded by people such as friends, sister, and coworkers in multiple tweets. Their style is highly emotional, imaginative, and people‑oriented, fitting Intuition (N) more than concrete Sensing; they dramatize feelings and situations like in “porra depois de séculos esse maluco aparece nos meus sonhos e ainda desse jeito? jesus pode me levar” and obsess over fandoms and stories such as “ORDEM PARANORMAL PORRA CARALHO” rather than practical details. The dominance of emotional expression and relationship focus points to Feeling (F): they gush about affection in “toda vez que o gael me liga bêbado falando que me ama uma flor nasce no planeta”, complain dramatically about being hurt or annoyed in “gente to muito chateado”, and center loyalty and closeness with friends and idols. Their life seems spontaneous and reactive rather than structured, indicating Perceiving (P): they forget events like “HOJE TEM REVELANDO MDS ESQUECI COMPLETAMENTE”, jump between trips and parties as in “pensando aqui se vou pro rj de novo ou fico no cu de sp mesmo”, and often say they are just "analisando possível resenha" in a go‑with‑the‑flow way (“analisando possível resenha 👀”). Taken together—highly social, expressive, emotional, chaotic, and future/possibility‑oriented—this combination best matches ENFP.
Some pickup lines for you
- You keep saying ‘homem cis é tão brocha’, but I promise you this: give one trans disaster who loves Yoongi and Frank Ocean a chance, and I’ll make you feel more ‘EU SOU A PESSOA MAIS FELIZ DO UNIVERSO’ than that day he appeared on your timeline.
- You said ‘queria alguém pra montar uns fit foda e combinar piercing’ — I volunteer as tribute. We can coordinate outfits, compare piercings, then you can decide if I’m worthy of being one of your ‘meus bebês’.
- You’re out here planning blocos, cachaças and praia, but also making sopa and bolo for a recém-parida friend. That’s peak chaos and peak carinho at the same time — exactly my type. Can I book a spot between your caipirinha de morango and your next act of kindness?
- Every time Gael te liga bêbado dizendo que te ama, you say a flower is born on the planet. Imagine how floresta amazônica it would get if I called you sober, remembering your birthday AND bringing a dump de 4 fotos só pra você.
- You said ‘ai o que você é?’ and answered ‘eu sou o capeta porra’. Perfect, because I’m clearly ‘ordem paranormal’: apareço na sua DM de madrugada, atiço o diabo, e ainda te levo pra resenha depois do expediente CLT que você jurou abandonar.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Part-time beach dreamer, full-time chaos coordinator. Once made soup and cake for a friend who’d just given birth and called it a wild Friday night.– @cortefijos
Your signature cocktail
Bloquinho do Capeta Spritz
This drink starts with cachaça infused with strawberry, because they’re the friend of cachaça, beach and blocos, literally asking “quem quer caipirinha de morango?” and dreaming that soon they’ll be “na praia ou em algum bloquinho enchendo a cara” here. Sparkling coconut water adds a soft, emotional side for the affectionate chaos of being the paizão that makes soup and cake for a postpartum friend “imagina ter eu como amigo…” and melts every time Gael calls drunk saying he loves them “toda vez que o gael me liga bêbado…”. Lime juice with a pinch of salt is their sharp, complaining tongue about buses, money, and CLT life, like when they say “6,50 a passagem e os ônibus sempre caindo aos pedaços que palhaçada” here and “gente cansei de ser clt vou abandonar o serviço” here. A dash of red bitter liqueur represents the devilish, dramatic self-image — “eu sou o capeta porra não enche o saco” here — and the late‑night “o diabo atiça na madrugada mesmo é real” energy here. Finally, a tiny drizzle of toasted sugar syrup stands for their soft spot for their “bebês” “meus bebês 😿” and their over-the-top joy when Yoongi appears — “EU SOU A PESSOA MAIS FELIZ DO UNIVERSO” here — giving this chaotic spritz a sweet, comforting finish beneath all the sarcasm and noise.
Your Hogwarts House
Hufflepuff
They consistently center friendship, care, and emotional support, which are core Hufflepuff traits. For example, they gush over their friends with clear affection and protectiveness, like talking about Gael with a mix of exasperation and love in “toda vez que o gael me liga bêbado falando que me ama uma flor nasce no planeta” and “um mês sem meu menino gael ja to sentindo o sentindo da solidão”. They also take on a nurturing role, proudly saying “eu sempre to ensinando as coisas pro gael mds me sinto um paizao 🥹” and describing themselves cooking and caring for a friend who just gave birth in “imagina ter eu como amigo tipo eu to na casa da minha amiga recém parida fazendo sopa e bolo pra ela 😿😿”. Even when they complain about work and money, there’s no strong sign of Slytherin-style ambition or Gryffindor heroics; instead, we see a grounded, social, ‘ride-or-die’ friend who values small joys and loyalty, as in “ter amigos que fazem aniversário um dia depois do outro é engraçado me deixa ate com medo de confundir os dias 😿” and “🥹♾️ @necrpist 🤞”. Their sarcasm and venting are there, but they keep circling back to caring for people (friends, sister, coworkers, idols, pets), which aligns most strongly with Hufflepuff’s kindness and loyalty.
Your movie
Your song
Pink + White - Frank Ocean
They literally say in their bio that they’re “alfa do yoongi e do frank ocean,” so a Frank Ocean track fits them perfectly. Pink + White balances softness and chaos, just like their mix of affection and drama – they gush over friends like in “toda vez que o gael me liga bêbado falando que me ama uma flor nasce no planeta” while also being messy and loud about life, like “chega me deu vontade de vomitar” and “homem cis é tao brocha deus me livre”. The song’s themes of fleeting moments and trying to enjoy life before it slips away echo their carnival and drinking energy, as in “e pensar que daqui uma semana nesse horário eu vou estar na praia ou em algum bloquinho enchendo a cara preenche meu coração” and “saudade das cachaças que bebi ontem”. At the same time, there’s a vulnerable, anxious side under the bravado, seen in tweets like “pensa num bicho ansioso” and “odeio passar pela fase do corpo se acostumar com o remédio pqp q bagulho chato”, which matches the bittersweet nostalgia in Pink + White. Overall, it captures their mix of tenderness, chaos, humor, and emotional intensity better than any one loud party song would.
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