Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Humorous: Uses absurd, sexual, and situational humor to narrate daily life, like joking about customers and work in “Cliente que manda audio com mais de um minuto ta querendo acabar com meu dia” and “o cara entrou na loja pra perguntar se tinha cafe e achou ruim quando disse que tinha agua”.
- Culturally-savvy: Shows deep engagement with film, TV, and books (Gregg Araki, Talamasca, Castlevania, Dead Ringers, The Vampire Lestat) in tweets like “imagina viver sem ter visto pelo menos um filme do gregg araki” and “talamasca é como se hannibal e entrevista com o vampiro tivessem um filho”.
- Emotionally-expressive: Shares feelings openly—boredom, tenderness, excitement, and sensitivity—in posts like “Essa foto me deixa sensível” and “Minha mae acabou de se assumir bi pra mim é o dia mais feliz da minha vida”.
- Sex-positive: Talks about desire and sexuality without shame, whether joking about porn and crushes or specific fantasies, as in “isso aqui é sexo gay” and “eu quero fazer tesourinha com outro homem e ter uma experiência lesbica”.
- Self-aware: Shows awareness of their own habits and contradictions, like acknowledging horny posting in “tentando nao fazer horny posting” and financial caution in “Tive um momento de lucidez e tirei meu dinheiro do Nubank pra por em um banco de verdade”.
Weaknesses:
- Impulsive-sexual: Repeatedly posts very explicit sexual thoughts, which could backfire socially or professionally, e.g. “quero pinto duro vermelho” and “Assistindo capitão america e esse hulk vermelho é muito gostoso queria ver o pau dele”.
- Negativity-prone: Frequently vents through harsh complaints about people and things, such as “sua existência me estressa”, “nojo de praia”, and “esse ano ta bem chatinho”.
- Attention-seeking: Often hints at wanting affection, drama, or validation, like “deus podia me abençoar com um lovebombing” and “algum homem mulher ou não binário pra aparecer no meu quarto de madrugada”.
- Restless-bored: Expresses frequent boredom and dissatisfaction with routine, as in “to tao entediado queria voltar pra vida de algum quase algo” and “esse ano ta bem chatinho”.
- Emotionally-vulnerable: Shows loneliness and craving for connection or romantic intensity, which may lead to hurtful dynamics, in tweets like “gente acho que vou conhecer o amor da minha vida em janeiro” and “to com fomo das manifestações contra o felca no roblox”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
They match best with Lisa Simpson, but as if Lisa grew up queer, horny, and Very Online. Like Lisa, they’re hyper-verbal and introspective about culture, obsessing over films, books, and reviews, from “imagina viver sem ter visto pelo menos um filme do gregg araki” to “faz meia hora que eu to lendo review de perfume em um site e estou encantado com a melancolia e poesia dessas pessoas” and talking about Letterboxd in “My ★★★½ review of Dead Ringers on @letterboxd”. Their mix of cynicism and yearning also feels very Lisa: they complain about work and clients in “Cliente que manda audio com mais de um minuto ta querendo acabar com meu dia” and “acho engraçado quando cliente fica bravo pq ele mesmo colocou o nome no serasa”, yet long for romance and connection in “deus podia me abençoar com um lovebombing” and “gente acho que vou conhecer o amor da minha vida em janeiro”. Their moral universe is flexible and darkly curious—into vampires, Hannibal, Carmilla, and eroticized violence—echoing Lisa’s intellectual fascination with taboo topics, as seen in tweets like “to lendo o vampiro lestat e só quero saber quando ele vai transar com a mãe”. Finally, their strong attachment to art, media, and a slightly alienated sense of self—“me sinto meio um espírito obsessor observando tudo que a pessoa fala sem ela saber” and “os salvos do tiktok sao minha biblioteca de alexandria”—perfectly matches Lisa’s vibe as the too-aware, too-sensitive kid in a loud, chaotic world.
Your MBTI personality Type
INFP
They lean Introvert (I): most posts center on solitary media consumption and internal states rather than socializing, such as rereading/rewatching favorites like Castlevania (“perdi a conta de quantas vezes eu ja vi castlevania mas acho que ta na hora de ver de novo”) or wandering around the house alone in underwear (“Adoro ficar andando so de cueca pela casa de noite me sinto tanto livre”). They show strong Intuition (N) with a focus on mood, symbolism, and fantasy over concrete details: longing to live in the Garden of Eden and eat the forbidden fruit (“off queria muito viver no jardim do éden e comer da fruta proibida”) and waxing poetic about perfume reviews (“estou encantado com a melancolia e poesia dessas pessoas”). Their judgment is clearly Feeling (F)-dominated, prioritizing emotional resonance, aesthetics, and relationships over logic, as in emotional reactions to films (“lindo filme to emocionado”) and the deep joy at their mother coming out as bi (“Minha mae acabou de se assumir bi pra mim é o dia mais feliz da minha vida”). Finally, they are distinctly Perceiving (P): they embrace spontaneity and shifting moods, like drinking the whole bottle of wine after making risotto (“fiz risoto comi 5 vezes e bebi a garrfa toda de vinho”) and describing the year as “chatinho” while drifting through boredom and desire (“to tao entediado queria voltar pra vida de algum quase algo”). The combination of introspective solitude, imaginative fantasy, highly emotional responses, and flexible, unstructured lifestyle aligns best with INFP.
Some pickup lines for you
- You keep rewatching Castlevania and Talamasca waiting for velhos botando twink na chapa, but have you considered skipping the slow burn and letting me be your canonically deranged love interest instead?
- You said you want to do tesourinha with another man for a lesbian experience — plot twist: we call it a Gregg Araki crossover, put Arctic Monkeys on loop, and let the bisexual chaos handle the rest.
- You hate when people log series on Letterboxd, but I’d happily be your only ‘★★★★★ rewatch’ if it means you keep pausing Die My Love to open your chest for me instead of Jennifer Lawrence.
- Since your mom came out bi and it was the happiest day of your life, how about we honor the family tradition and let me make you just as happy on some random Tuesday night?
- You complain about Stremio, your Kindle dying, and clients sending 1-minute audios, so let me be the opposite: low-maintenance, high-pleasure, and available in HD every time you post about walking around your house in just your underwear.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Customer service by day, horror & queer cinema by night. Once bought a plant full price the day before a 50% sale and never recovered.– @crorvus
Your signature cocktail
Horny Gothic Mutual Negroni
This drink is strong, dramatic and a little unhinged, just like someone who tweets “tentando nao fazer horny posting” and still somehow fails. The Campari with rose petals channels their romantic, sex-brained melodrama from posts like “quero pinto duro vermelho” and “eu quero fazer tesourinha com outro homem e ter uma experiência lesbica”. The black vermouth represents their love of vampires, horror and Catholic guilt kink hinted at in “off queria muito viver no jardim do éden e comer da fruta proibida” and “forgive me father”. Smoky gin nods to late-night solitary vibes and artsy tastes, from “as plantas do meu quarto nao devem estar aguentando eu em casa quase todo dia essa semana com as cortina fechada” to their cinephile posts like “imagina viver sem ter visto pelo menos um filme do gregg araki”. A spoon of cherry liqueur keeps it playful and a bit trashy-romantic, echoing their desire for attention and lovebombing in “deus podia me abençoar com um lovebombing”. The red lace ice cube is a nod to “vou passar o ano novo de calcinha vermelha e vcs”, melting slowly like a slutty little sympathy spell in the glass.
Your Hogwarts House
Ravenclaw
This user shows strong Ravenclaw traits through their curiosity and enthusiasm for art, film, and literature. They frequently reference movies, series, and directors with genuine interest and discernment, like when they say “imagina viver sem ter visto pelo menos um filme do gregg araki” and share a nuanced “My ★★★½ review of Dead Ringers on @letterboxd”, indicating a reflective and analytical engagement with media. Their reading habits also show a fascination with complex, even transgressive narratives, as in “to lendo o vampiro lestat e só quero saber quando ele vai transar com a mãe”, which suggests an attraction to morally and psychologically complicated stories rather than simple comfort reads. They clearly value aesthetic and conceptual appreciation, noting how “pornografia antiga é tao aesthetic” and being “encantado” by perfume reviews that have “melancolia e poesia” in “faz meia hora que eu to lendo review de perfume em um site e estou encantado com a melancolia e poesia dessas pessoas”. Even their media obsessions are framed in a highly interpretive way—comparing shows and books like “talamasca é como se hannibal e entrevista com o vampiro tivessem um filho”—which reflects a pattern of intellectual play and intertextual thinking typical of Ravenclaw. While they are horny, chaotic, and funny, the consistent throughline is a brain that is always interpreting, categorizing, and savoring culture, which aligns more with Ravenclaw than the other houses.
Your movie
Your song
Teen Idle - MARINA
A well‑suited song for them is Teen Idle by MARINA because it mixes dark humor, queer longing, and a kind of bored, horny melancholy that runs through their timeline. They’re constantly oscillating between ennui and desire, like when they say they’re "so bored I want to go back to the life of an almost-something with someone" and when they joke about wanting "a lovebombing blessing from God." The song’s themes of wanting more intense experiences and a dramatic, messy youth echo their horny, self-deprecating posting such as "I want to scissor with another man and have a lesbian experience" and "you think this mouth is only for blowjobs, I need it to take my pills." Their fascination with aestheticized darkness and slightly cursed romance—"pornografia antiga é tao aesthetic" and their love of vampiric/gothic media like Talamasca and The Vampire Lestat—also fits the song’s glamorized morbidity. Overall, Teen Idle captures their mix of irony, queer yearning, and morbidly romantic vibe.
Your time travel destination
Your video game
Your spirit animal
Your (un)funny joke
Your superpower
Your fictional best friend
Your dream vacation
Your alternate career path
Your celebrity match
Did you enjoy your Horoscope?
Your horoscope is 18 days old! Generate a better one from your latest tweets, unlock more insights and use a smarter pro AI!
