Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Dedicated Supporter: Zen consistently promotes the group's work, urging followers to “STREAM ‘MENTION ME’ BY CORTIS”.
- Observant Fan: Notices minute details, like how James's signature resembles “the last character of his chinese name”.
- Appreciative of Artistry: Expresses deep respect for the group's “relentless dedication and love to their art”.
- Humorous Communicator: Uses self-deprecating humor and hyperbole, like claiming they “just laid an egg” out of shock.
- Community Oriented: Actively engages with the fandom, asking “WHERE IS FAMILY” when the timeline is quiet.
Weaknesses:
- Social Media Addiction: Admits that “being on this app everyday” prevents them from focusing on real-life priorities.
- Hyper-fixated Boundaries: Posts sexually charged comments, such as wanting to “lick it off” regarding sweat or towels.
- Inconsistent Digital Presence: Abruptly decides on “deactivating this account” after a period of intense posting.
- Obsessive Behavior: Publicly begs an idol's account to “UNBLOXKMEEEEEEEEEEEE” multiple times.
- Excessive Vulgarity: Relies heavily on profanity and crude jokes, like calling themselves James's “alpha dom daddy”.
Your Simpsons character
Homer Simpson
This user is overwhelmingly emotional, impulsive, and loudly devoted to their obsessions, which aligns closely with Homer Simpson. Like Homer fixating on trivial things with extreme intensity, they spiral dramatically over their faves, e.g. “today is the day i become an alcoholic” and “oh my god i just laid an egg”. Their over-the-top, often horny enthusiasm toward James and Cortis mirrors Homer’s chaotic passion for food, TV, and Marge, as seen in “JAMES YOU DONT NEED THAT TOWEL THROW IT AWAY LEMME LICK IT OFF FOR U BABY” and “HE’S SO CUTE I WANT MY BABIES IN HIM”. They’re also comically dramatic about minor inconveniences and fandom events, similar to Homer turning everything into a life-or-death saga: “kms POSTPONED” and “MENTION ME TOMORROW!!!!”. Even their melodramatic sign-off about deactivating to “spend time” with their “wife james” — “being on this app everyday means i dont get to spend my time with my wife james and give him the time and attention he deserves” — feels very Homer: ridiculous, heartfelt, and completely ruled by feelings over logic.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
They read as an Extrovert (E) because they constantly seek interaction, rally the fandom, and dramatize their experiences for an audience, e.g. hyping everyone with “CORTIS CB CONFIRMED LETS GOOOOOOOO” and joking about being Cortis’ “australian chingu” in “im cortis’s australian chingu”. Their language is highly imaginative, metaphorical, and future‑oriented, suggesting Intuition (N), as seen in lines like “need this selfie injected into my bloodstream and travelling throughout my whole body alongside my blood with every beat of my heart” and their dramatic reaction to album/news build‑up in “2 months we can do it guys”. They prioritize feelings, relationships, and emotional connection over logic, pointing to Feeling (F): they gush about how hardworking and precious the members are in “my hardworking jjamibear I hope u get to rest for awhile” and “he deserves that and so much more ☹️☹️ my precious boy”, and dramatize hurt when blocked in “UNBLOXKMEEEEEEEEEEEE @willestbloom”. Their behavior looks spontaneous, reactive, and flexible rather than structured, consistent with Perceiving (P)—they talk about needing to log out in “i need to log out oh my god”, threaten to deactivate impulsively in “ive decided it. im deactivating this account 🥲”, and jokingly postpone things like in “kms POSTPONED”. Altogether, their energetic interaction, emotional intensity, metaphorical language, and spontaneous style fit ENFP best.
Some pickup lines for you
- I know you’re deactivating to spend more time with James, but if you need a '13th reason' to stay on the app, I promise I’m way more interesting than a hair straightener.
- Are you a Cortis comeback? Because I’ve been praying for times like this and I’m willing to wait two months just for a teaser of your attention.
- Forget James’ signature—I’m much more interested in the way your handle looks in my mentions. Can I be the 'william' to your 'james'?
- You don't need Dolby Atmos speakers to hear how much I like you, but I’d still play our song at full volume for the entire neighborhood.
- If you’re looking for a distraction before uni starts in two weeks, I’m available—and unlike Martin, I’m actually pretty hard to ragebait.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Full-time Cortis archivist, part-time uni student. Once delayed an assignment to live-tweet James’ sweat. Opinions my own, streams mandatory.– @cvntjames
Your signature cocktail
The James-Licked Joyride
This cocktail is a chaotic, experimental blend that mirrors Zen’s unfiltered and high-energy devotion to Cortis. The smokiness captures the frequent use of the cigarette emoji when he’s overwhelmed, like when he posts “james of cortis 🚬🚬🚬”, while the strawberry base honors his softest descriptions: “IF NOT STRAWBERRY WHY STRAWBERRY SHAPED”. The salt is a cheeky nod to his thirstier observations, specifically “those drops of sweat pooling at his chin..”, and the drink is served strong enough to make you feel like you’ve “just laid an egg”. It’s a bold, 'all-in' drink for a fan who claims “ONLY FIRST PLACE CAUSE IM A LEADER HELLYEAHHHHHHH”.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Zen demonstrates strong Slytherin traits through their focus on leadership and resourcefulness in achieving their goals within the fandom. They explicitly claim a position of authority, tweeting “ONLY FIRST PLACE CAUSE IM A LEADER HELLYEAHHHHHHH” after achieving a high ranking. Their ambition is fueled by a desire for exclusive proximity to their idols, often using bold, provocative language to stand out, such as claiming to be “james alpha dom daddy”. Finally, they exhibit a cunning sense of self-preservation and boundary-setting by choosing to deactivate their account to reclaim their personal time, stating “i think this is the best course of action to take” to prioritize their own happiness.
Your movie
Your song
Maniac - Stray Kids
Zen’s online presence is defined by an intense, almost frenzied devotion to the boy group Cortis, specifically members James and William. Their tweets oscillate between high-energy excitement and playfully unhinged commentary, such as when they exclaim, “HE’S SO CUTE I WANT MY BABIES IN HIM” or describe their physical reaction to a photo as “oh my god i just laid an egg”. This “maniac” energy is central to their persona, as they often joke about their own lack of restraint, tweeting “i need to log out oh my god” while continuing to spiral over new content. The song’s theme of hidden, explosive passion perfectly mirrors Zen's self-described “alpha dom daddy” humor and their vivid, loud dedication to their idols.
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