Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Affectionate partner: Frequently expresses love and obsession with their boyfriend, e.g. “i miss my boyfriend chat :(( i think im a bit obsessed w him kinda lwk” and “theyre my boyfriend now i won :3”.
- Humorous storyteller: Uses funny, dramatic phrasing and sexual innuendo to turn everyday events into jokes, e.g. “ill be whatever you want me to be… ‘you arent a slip n slide’” and “love sending my chronically offline boyfriend my chronically online things like yes babe gaze at alexander hamiltom shitting out a baby”.
- Passionate fan: Shows deep enthusiasm for media and characters, e.g. “watching the iwtv series after the movie is like .. an awakening” and “i love my bug lawyer husband a totally normal amount hehe.. hes so prettu”.
- Self-expressive: Openly shares identity and interests, from bio pronouns and orientations to tweets like “UM UM MEET MY YUMESHIP..” and “locked in making new yume content because i can :3”.
- Socially engaged: Interacts actively with oomfs and friends through quote tweets, interaction circles, and prompts like “favs in yellow.. or sumn :3 reply 4 a colour :3” and “reply and ill give u an age :3”.
Weaknesses:
- Crisis language: Frequently uses suicidal or extreme phrasing for frustration, e.g. “if this bus comes late one more time im killing myself its SO COLD” and acknowledges this habit in “threatening to kms at every minor inconvenience… isnt the best course of action yk”.
- Emotional impulsivity: Tweets intense feelings in the moment, such as “this is me realising im not as over my ex as i thought i was lol i want them BACK!!” and “what do you MEAN my friends abusive ex was flirting with me… what the FUCK”.
- Overcommitment stress: Takes on demanding workloads and later feels overwhelmed, shown by “this college shit is not for me wdym ive got more essays to write its my FIRST WEEK” and “musical theatre on top of law psych and history”.
- Boundary vulnerability: Experiences boundary issues with others, like “one of my friends is telling people y deadname what if i tweak who tbe fuck does that hello” and discomfort around an abusive ex flirting in this tweet.
- Self-doubt: Shows anxiety about being a burden, as in “asking my wife if im annoying constantly isnt the best course of action yk” and repeatedly worrying about social dynamics with oomfs and partners.
Your Simpsons character
Bart Simpson
They match Bart Simpson most closely: chaotic, emotional, and constantly joking even when things are stressful. Their timeline is full of impulsive, dramatic humor like “if this bus comes late one more time im killing myself its SO COLD” and “woke up and my bf was watching old man yaoi hes so real for that...”, which feels very Bart-coded teenage exaggeration. Like Bart, they’re affectionate but clowny about relationships, saying “i miss my boyfriend chat :(( i think im a bit obsessed w him kinda lwk” and “theyre my boyfriend now i won :3”. There’s also a streak of getting into messy social situations—complaining that “one of my friends is telling people y deadname what if i tweak who tbe fuck does that hello” and reacting to drama like “what do you MEAN my friends abusive ex was flirting with me… what the FUCK”—which fits Bart’s knack for chaos. Overall, they have Bart’s mix of mischief, vulnerability, and big feelings delivered as jokes.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
They lean Extraverted: they constantly discuss friends, partner, and online social life, e.g. gushing about their boyfriend and interactions with oomfs in tweets like “i miss my boyfriend chat :(( i think im a bit obsessed w him kinda lwk” and “downloaded yubo and wizz and im terrified i need these men to STOP hella ego boost though ive had so many men call me hot its lwk”. They seem iNtuitive, focusing on fandoms, characters, and imagined scenarios (yumeshipping, fictional husbands, roleplaying within stories), such as “UM UM MEET MY YUMESHIP.. i didnt know tgere was an actyally community for this until likeee two months ago so not much content but :3” and “locked in making new yume content because i can :3 i hate them theyre so GAY”, which are highly imaginative rather than concrete. Their tone is clearly Feeling-oriented: they center emotions, relationships, and values over logic, like when they worry about being annoying and their mental health in “sometimes i need to remember that threatening to kms at every minor inconvenience and asking my wife if im annoying constantly isnt the best course of action yk” or feel deeply about an ex in “this is me realising im not as over my ex as i thought i was lol i want them BACK!!”. They appear more Perceiving than Judging, showing spontaneity and a tendency to get overwhelmed by structure, e.g. stressing over essays and changing courses in “ESSAYS ARE NO LONGER NEEDED i am (HOPEFULLY) changing my course no more biology than the LORD hopefully i get into either crim or law BAHSB” and “this college shit is not for me wdym ive got more essays to write its my FIRST WEEK”. Overall, the enthusiastic social energy, creative fandom focus, emotion-driven perspective, and flexible, somewhat chaotic lifestyle align best with ENFP.
Some pickup lines for you
- You’re out here changing courses from biology to law and psych, but I think the real crime is that nobody’s written legislation yet about how obsessed I am with you and your split-dyed hair.
- So you’re watching the IWTV series after the movie and having an awakening… if you ever need another gothic little British vampire to pine over on the night bus, I promise I bite way softer than your essays do.
- You said threatening to kms at every minor inconvenience and asking your wife if you’re annoying isn’t the best course of action—counter‑proposal: you rant to me about college, I reassure you you’re not annoying, and then we celebrate with Sabrina Carpenter and old man yaoi recs from your bf.
- You once tweeted ‘they’re my boyfriend now, I won :3’ — hypothetically, if I sent you a fox plush and learned Spanish via Duolingo just to flirt with you, would I stand a chance at winning too, or is that title permanently taken?
- Your yumeship with the bug lawyer husband and Rolan Deep is powerful, but imagine the chaos of a self‑insert where it’s just you, me, a screaming bus, and us bullying Duolingo together because we forgot one word in Spanish and got distracted romanticising each other instead.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Edison, 17 • British Virgo studying law/psych/history, making yume content & overthinking on public transport. Once learned Spanish just to DM an oomf.– @cxral_tea
Your signature cocktail
Hyperace Hemlock Highball
The blackcurrant and blackberry soda gives a dark, vampy sweetness that fits their goth-y, British vibe and love of dramatic media like “watching the iwtv series after the movie is like .. an awakening or something holy shit i loved the movie but the series is sumn else ENTIRELY”. A shot of espresso captures their high-energy, slightly chaotic college life and constant emotional spike, from “this college shit is not for me wdym ive got more essays to write its my FIRST WEEK” to “ESSAYS ARE NO LONGER NEEDED i am (HOPEFULLY) changing my course”. The dash of violet liqueur reflects their romantic, yumeshipper core and devotion to fictional and real partners, like “UM UM MEET MY YUMESHIP..” and “i miss my boyfriend chat :(( i think im a bit obsessed w him kinda lwk”. A lemon twist adds a sharp, tangy edge for their blunt humour and occasional melodramatic spirals, as in “if this bus comes late one more time im killing myself its SO COLD”. Finally, edible silver glitter mirrors their theatrical, self-aware aesthetic and love of being a little extra online, especially when they declare “i am FREE and i am not sory for the ampunt i will talk about saeram because i love him and he lobes me actually” and introduce themself with unapologetic flair in “HII!! im edison hehe ☆ ☆ im 17 y/o !! he/it mlnw + hyperace !! ☆ british.. i have a yumeshipper account :p”.
Your Hogwarts House
Hufflepuff
Edison consistently centers relationships and attachment, which is very Hufflepuff-coded. They talk about missing and doting on their boyfriend, e.g. “i miss my boyfriend chat :(( i think im a bit obsessed w him kinda lwk” and the excitement of finally being together, “theyre my boyfriend now i won :3”. This loyalty is also visible in how they’re willing to learn a new language just to connect with a friend: “learning spanish to talk to oomf but duolingo is killing me rn laik pls i didnt mean to forget the word today”. Their distress at a friend spreading their deadname — “one of my friends is telling people y deadname what if i tweak who tbe fuck does that hello” — shows how much they value trust and basic decency. Even when overwhelmed by college, they’re still trying to push through coursework (“this college shit is not for me wdym ive got more essays to write its my FIRST WEEK”, “i dojt like college :( i jusy wanna read my iwaoi not write 5 essays.....”), which fits Hufflepuff’s persevering, quietly hardworking side more than ambitious Slytherin or glory-seeking Gryffindor. Overall, their defining traits are devotion to partners and oomfs, emotional sincerity, and a desire for stable, kind relationships — classic Hufflepuff qualities.
Your movie
Your song
Obsessed - Sabrina Carpenter
A well‑suited song for Edison is “Obsessed” by Sabrina Carpenter, because it matches both his chaotic romantic energy and his actual music taste. He talks repeatedly about his boyfriend and being "a bit obsessed w him kinda lwk" in posts like “i miss my boyfriend chat :(( i think im a bit obsessed w him kinda lwk”, which fits the playful fixation in the song’s lyrics. The way he treats relationships with intense, humorous drama – for example “this is me realising im not as over my ex as i thought i was lol i want them BACK!!” – lines up with the song’s theatrical, tongue‑in‑cheek tone. It also helps that he’s canonically a Sabrina listener, mentioning his boyfriend’s reaction with “got the bf to listen to sabrina carpenter… he said she sounded like basic white girl music but HE LISTENED TO HER” and confusion at “what do you MEAN hes never heqrd of sabrina carpenter”. The combination of queer romance, joking dramatics, and hyperfixation on partners makes Obsessed feel like it could soundtrack his timeline.
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