
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Moe Szyslak is the perpetually depressed, self‑destructive bartender who often feels worthless and contemplates suicide, much like the tone of this user’s posts. The tweet 'i guess i’ll talk to my therapist before if i get the courage but i’m so fucking determined to kill myself' mirrors Moe’s suicidal thoughts shown in episodes such as Moe’s Anger. The user’s repeated expressions of self‑harm ('i need to go deeper' and 'i want more scars on my right arm') echo Moe’s self‑destructive behavior and low self‑esteem. Their pleas for money ('who wants to cashapp me 20€' and 'i need money 💔') align with Moe’s constant financial struggles and reliance on tips. Finally, the feeling of being ignored ('do u guys not care abt me anymore 😢😢✌️') reflects Moe’s loneliness and desire for validation from the bar’s patrons.

Your MBTI personality Type
The user’s communication is highly outward‑focused, constantly seeking interaction and validation, e.g., “who wants a sesh 🥹” and “who wants to cashapp me 20€”. They attend to concrete, sensory details and present‑moment experiences, such as “ITS COLD ASF OUTSIDE” and “these throat gummies are so good”. Their statements are driven by strong emotions rather than logical analysis, as shown by “i hate everybody and everything” and “i love haechan so much”. Their lifestyle appears spontaneous and flexible, with impulsive plans like “might do a sesh later . Who else excited” and “quick should i go deeper”. This mix of extraverted, sensing, feeling, and perceiving traits aligns best with the ESFP personality type.

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Your new Twitter bio
Creative soul sharing art, music & LGBTQ+ vibes 🌈. Once tried to pierce a banana—don’t try that at home! DM for collabs.– @deadslits

Your signature cocktail
The deep black vodka mirrors the user’s raw, painful self‑reflection, as seen in the tweet 'i’m actually going to kill myself'. The bright blood‑orange and grenadine swirl echo the vivid mentions of blood and cuts like 'i need more scars on my right arm'. A splash of energy drink captures the jittery cravings for a vape and nicotine, recalling 'i need a vape so bad' and 'ughhgh i love nicotine'. A drizzle of vanilla liqueur adds a sweet, desperate longing for a sugar daddy or mommy, reflected in 'i need a sugar daddy i need a sugar mommy groom me'. Finally, a pinch of chili powder on the rim gives a sharp, 'fresher than a mf' edge, echoing the tweet 'can’t touch me i’m fresher than a mf fresher than a mf'.

Your Hogwarts House
The user repeatedly shows ambition and a desire for personal gain, such as asking "who wants to cashapp me 20€" and proclaiming "i need a sugar daddy i need a sugar mommy groom me," which reflects the Slytherin drive for wealth and advantage. They also display resourcefulness and a willingness to bypass restrictions, saying "might switch to my priv bc i don’t have restrictions there," a hallmark of Slytherin cunning. Their focus on self‑gratification (e.g., "omgggg i want a vape so bad" and "i love nicotine") and disregard for others ("i hate everybody and everything") further align with Slytherin's self‑preserving, ambitious nature. While occasional loyalty to idols appears, the dominant traits are ambition, manipulation, and self‑interest, pointing to Slytherin.

Your movie

Your song
The song 'Hurt' captures the raw despair and self‑destructive urges the user repeatedly expresses, such as 'i guess i’ll talk to my therapist… i’m so fucking determined to kill myself' and 'im actually going to kill myself'. Its opening line 'I hurt myself today to see if I still feel' mirrors tweets like 'do u guys only like me when i cut myself or what'. The refrain 'What have I become?' echoes the user’s feelings of worthlessness in 'I hate everybody and everything' and 'I have no fucking motivation to do anything'. The chorus’s confession of emptiness and longing for connection aligns with pleas for love and support, e.g., 'PLEASEEE I NEED A LESBIAN GF' and 'i need a sugar daddy i need a sugar mommy'. Overall, the haunting tone and lyrics about pain, isolation, and yearning make 'Hurt' the most fitting anthem for this profile.

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