
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Jonas aligns with Lisa Simpson through their shared identity as a social-justice-oriented music enthusiast who often feels like an outsider. Like Lisa, Jonas is vocal about political empathy and activism, noting that “everyone on this app lacks empathy” and encouraging others to “absolutely donate to the cause!!!”. Their deep obsession with niche culture and the Nirvana discography mirrors Lisa's dedication to her saxophone and jazz legends. Jonas even captures Lisa’s occasional existential dread and frustration with society, tweeting, “I kind of want to disappear forever” and “I am only 10% in reality”. Ultimately, both characters navigate the world with a mix of intellectual curiosity and a profound sense of being misunderstood by their peers.

Your MBTI personality Type
Jonas exhibits Introversion through his deep immersion in solitary gaming and his admitted fear of social perception, stating his “strawpage has over 1k views on it and that scares me”. His Intuition is evident in his focus on abstract themes, symbols, and psychological analysis, such as when he asserts “kurt cobain was definitely autistic but you guys aren't ready for that conversation”. He leans toward Feeling, often prioritizing emotional intensity and personal values, which is reflected in his reaction to a game ending: “I AM OVERCOME WITH THE URGE TO LAUGH EVEN THOUGH NOTHING IS FUNNY!!!!!!”. Finally, his Perceiving nature is shown through his spontaneous, stream-of-consciousness posting style and his tendency to move with the flow of his interests, noted when he says “I'm bored as fuck i'm gonna play japanese doll again”.

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Your new Twitter bio
Grunge enthusiast and curator of the niche. When I’m not analyzing Nirvana’s discography, I’m navigating the eerie endings of Japanese horror games. Professional.– @ethanhawkeyaoi

Your signature cocktail
This experimental, high-energy drink reflects Jonas’s chaotic but endearing online presence. The “strawberries and cream dr pepper” base represents his personal favorites, while the smoky mezcal pays homage to his “grungetwt” roots and the fact that his “school was on fire”. The bitter Italian liqueur is a nod to his urgent command to “SEND HIM TO ITALY!!!!!!!”, and the Pop Rocks rim mimics the feeling of having “AN EPISODE BUT I DON'T CARE ANYMORE”. Finally, the marshmallow garnish honors his dedicated gaming grind where he “collected all the poltergeists!!!!!”

Your Hogwarts House
Jonas exhibits the classic Gryffindor trait of raw impulsivity and intense emotional expression, often live-tweeting their internal state with unfiltered fervor, such as when they posted, “I AM OVERCOME WITH THE URGE TO LAUGH EVEN THOUGH NOTHING IS FUNNY!!!!!!”. They demonstrate a strong sense of justice and a willingness to stand up for their beliefs, even when it involves calling out others, as seen in their defense of social causes: “wow harassing a woman and her husband how feminist and cool of you gamze”. This combination of bravery in the face of social scrutiny and a penchant for dramatic, high-energy outbursts—exemplified by their reaction to a game ending, “I'M SO CLOSE TO ACTUALLY FINISHING THE WHOLE GAME I'M SCARED”—aligns perfectly with the bold and spirited nature of a Gryffindor.

Your movie

Your song
As a self-proclaimed grunge fan and “Kurt Cobain's Manager,” Jonas embodies the raw, bipolar energy found in Lithium. The song’s themes of mental instability and shifting moods perfectly mirror his volatile posting style, where he fluctuates between screaming “I NEED SOMEONE TO SEDATE ME” and then calmly stating “I'm normal again.” His obsession with a digital character he calls his daughter and his admission that he is “only 10% in reality” reflects the song's struggle with identity and dissociation. Ultimately, his declaration that “kurt cobain was definitely autistic” and his deep immersion in #grungetwt make this Nirvana classic his definitive anthem.

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