Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Cinematic Knowledge: Tori maintains a Letterboxd profile and critiques everything from Godard to Late Night with the Devil.
- Professionalism: Despite being accused of elitism, she clarifies she was at the mall working rather than just leisure.
- Social Integrity: She boycotted a cinema after they reposted offensive content regarding an abuse situation.
- Individualistic Thinking: She encourages others to have their own opinions rather than following trends or "maria vai com as outras."
- Animal Lover: She expresses a strong desire to live alone specifically so she can adopt a cat.
Weaknesses:
- Reactive Temperament: She frequently expresses frustration with the platform, calling it hell and insufferable.
- Harsh Judgment: She makes sweeping negative statements, such as saying blond men should be illegal.
- Superficial Elitism: She mocks men who smoke cigars to feel old money as the most pathetic thing in the world.
- Regional Defensiveness: She gets easily triggered by comments from people from other states criticizing Rio de Janeiro.
- Impatience: She admits to muting everyone because she couldn't wait a single day for The Bear spoilers to subside.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
Tori mirrors Lisa Simpson through her intellectual elitism and her role as a self-proclaimed “cinéfila chata”, often critiquing others for being a “maria vai com as outras”. Like Lisa, she is politically conscious and quick to call out behavior she deems “nojentos, ridículos, babacas”, showing a strong moral compass regarding social issues. She frequently feels misunderstood by her peers, lamenting that “tudo que falam aqui alguém problematiza” while simultaneously holding high standards for art, such as her critique of A Quiet Place: Day One as “mal dirigido”. Her desire for independence and a “gato” reflects Lisa’s solitary, principled, and animal-loving nature.
Your MBTI personality Type
ISFP
Tori exhibits Introversion through her desire to “live alone” and her tendency to watch films or musicals by herself. She demonstrates Sensing by focusing on aesthetics and physical details, such as being “in love with her hair tone” or commenting on specific “fade out transitions” in movies. Her Feeling trait is prominent in her strong emotional reactions to injustice and her defense of “having your own opinion” over following the crowd. Finally, her Perceiving nature shows in her spontaneous reactions to daily frustrations and her “go with the flow” attitude toward media consumption, often tweeting about whatever show or film she is currently binging without a strict schedule.
Some pickup lines for you
- I promise I’m not a 'Maria vai com as outras'—I actually have the original opinion that you’re the most interesting person in Rio (and I don't even need a Kennedy bloodline to see it).
- Are you a Letterboxd review? Because even if the plot of my life is a mess, I’d still give every day with you ★★★★ and a 'very interesting' tag.
- I’d never prioritize a burger over you, but if we go to Spoleto and they put carrots in your ham again, I’m ready to start a Twitter thread so big the entire Zona Sul will hear about it.
- Forget the strawberry blonde hair and the Old Money cigar guys—the only 'view' in this city worth posting about is you, and I don't even need to take the Metro to Jacarepaguá to know it.
- I’m looking for someone to see 'Dear Evan Hansen' with, and since your dad might be busy, how about we go together? I promise not to post any 'The Bear' spoilers on the way there.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Cinephile & critic sharing hot takes from Rio. Once interviewed Tontom Perigosa; now just dodging spoilers, bruxism, and ZS elitism. Letterboxd enthusiast.– @filmsdickinson
Your signature cocktail
The Strawberry Blonde Cynic
This drink captures Tori’s aesthetic and sharp wit, starting with a base of strawberry gin because she is “muito apaixonada pelo tom do meu cabelo tá totalmente strawberry blonde”. The heavy splash of Cynar represents her self-proclaimed status as a “cinéfila chata” who isn't afraid to give a classic like Pierrot le Fou a “★★ review”. A squeeze of Rio lime honors her defense of her home city, specifically that “a vista de um shopping que fica do lado do metrô” is actually beautiful. Finally, it’s served with a side of irony for the “homem hétero que fica tirando onda se achando old money por fumar charuto”, making it the perfect companion for a “semana movimentada” of dodging Twitter drama.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Tori displays a sharp, discerning nature and a strong sense of self-preservation, often prioritizing her own standards over popular opinion. She shows clear disdain for people who follow trends blindly, telling users they should “try to be a little less like follow-the-leader” and critiquing those who “ruined their own reputation by being disgusting.” Her resourcefulness and ambition are reflected in her professional drive, noting she was at a specific location “there for work” while defending her status against those calling her a “playboy.” Furthermore, her analytical and often cynical approach to cinema and social dynamics—seen when she calls a PR move “pathetic” and “vergonhoso”—aligns with the ambitious and shrewd traits of a Slytherin.
Your movie
Your song
Liability - Lorde
Tori’s online presence is defined by a mix of cynical film criticism and the feeling of being misunderstood by a judgmental digital crowd. She often laments the toxicity of social media, stating “meu deus essa rede social é o inferno mesmo” while defending herself against strangers who misinterpret her life, as seen when she exclaims “não tô querendo pagar de coitada tão enchendo o meu saco inventando uma narrativa sobre a minha vida q não existe”. Liability captures that specific “too much for people” energy she radiates when she complains that “tudo que falam aqui alguém problematiza”. Despite her sharp edges and habit of “mutando todo mundo”, there is a grounded, solitary side to her, like her simple desire to “morar sozinha logo quero muito adotar um gato”. This song perfectly mirrors her “cinéfila chata” persona—someone who is deeply observant, easily bored by others, and ultimately feels like an outsider in the very circles she frequents.
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