
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Homer Simpson is known for his chronic depression, impulsive self‑destructive habits and frequent thoughts of suicide, which mirrors the user’s many tweets about feeling like a failure and saying 'i have to lock in or i have to kill myself there’s no other option' and 'writing suicide notes as a coping mechanism'. He also constantly uses substances to escape reality, similar to Homer's endless drinking and the user’s references to weed and vaping such as 'i’m graduating in 6 months and i am failing … i have to kill myself' and 'i’m buying a #weedvape'. The user’s guilt about family, especially the line 'my grandpa, who is basically my dad', parallels Homer's complicated relationship with his father Abe. Both display erratic emotional swings, like the user’s 'when i’m high the visuals … are so vibrant' and Homer's extreme mood swings after a beer. Finally, the user’s self‑harm ('professional thigh slitter') and feeling trapped echo Homer's frequent bouts of despair and attempts to 'lock' himself into a hopeless situation.

Your MBTI personality Type
The user shows introverted (I) tendencies, primarily sharing internal monologues such as 'writing suicide notes as a coping mechanism and maybe need a way out if i can't take it anymore' and rarely describing external social events. They display intuitive (N) focus on abstract and future‑oriented thoughts, for example 'when im high the visuals in my mind when i listen to music are so vibrant and animated and abstract' and 'considering the human brain is so complex and incredible…'. Their decision‑making leans toward feeling (F), evident in value‑driven statements like 'i cannot understand how a grown adult could ever justify it in their heads to abuse children' and 'i hate gay transphobes more than i hate c1shet transphobes'. Finally, the pattern is perceiving (P), with a spontaneous, unstructured lifestyle shown by remarks such as 'i keep trying to quit vaping but i keep going back to it everytime something stressful happens' and 'i’m about to turn 17 and i don’t feel the urge to date a 12 year old…'. These traits together point to an INFP type.

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Your new Twitter bio
Creative writer & art enthusiast navigating mental health, humor & occasional cannabis musings. Once tried unlocking my grandpa's phone with my code.– @ghostofev

Your signature cocktail
The cocktail is named Ghost of Ev's Velvet Abyss, a nod to their username and the haunting melancholy that threads through their timeline. Its base of smoky mezcal mirrors the darkness in tweets like 'i am graduating in 6 months and i am failing. i have to lock in or i have to kill myself there's no other option', while the cannabis‑infused simple syrup captures the high‑induced clarity they claim: 'life feels so funny when im sober because im usually not... thats why i never want to be sober'. The sharp pop of gooseberry liqueur honors their self‑styled mother gooseberry of shtwt, and a dash of absinthe adds a surreal edge reminiscent of their line 'i love her im going to lock her in a maximum security safe … so she can never ever leave'. A squeeze of lime provides a bitter bite that echoes the raw honesty of 'i dont know what to do but something needs to change', making the drink a complex, bittersweet sip of their turbulent inner world.

Your Hogwarts House
The user exhibits strong ambitions for control and manipulation, hallmarks of Slytherin. They write, "i love her im going to lock her in a maximum security safe with like 15 different complex lock mechanisms so she can never ever leave," showing a cunning desire to dominate. Their statement, "ive been slowly warming up my wife to the idea of me cooking her into soup. day by day i get closer to making her into Soup," further reflects a ruthless resourcefulness. They also express a self‑preserving urgency: "i am graduating in 6 months and i am failing. i have to lock in or i have to kill myself there's no other option," indicating a willingness to do whatever is needed to survive. Finally, their constant rebranding attempts, like "REBRAND REBRAND its me guys nyan cat of shtwt...," reveal a drive for personal ambition and reinvention, consistent with Slytherin traits.

Your movie

Your song
The user frequently mentions self‑harm and suicidal thoughts, e.g., "writing suicide notes as a coping mechanism and maybe need a way out if i can't take it anymore" and "oh god i need to kill myself". The lyric "I hurt myself today to see if I still feel" mirrors those admissions. The song also reflects the feeling of emptiness and being broken, echoed in tweets like "i feel like im rotting" and "my best friend deserves so much better than me. i hate myself". The overall tone of despair, substance use to escape, and yearning for relief aligns with the mournful, introspective mood of "Hurt". Both the original Nine Inch Nails version and Johnny Cash's cover have become anthems for people confronting deep pain, making it a fitting match.

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green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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