Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Affectionate partner: Frequently expresses love and longing for girlfriend, e.g. wanting to go home and lie with her girlfriend in “chega dessa vuda de trabalhadora e estudante quero ir ora casa e deitar com a minha mukhe😢😢😢”.
- Ambitious student: Has clear academic goals like passing all public universities to prove something to her father in “ansiosa pra passar em todas as faculdades publicas de sao paulo e regiao so pra jogar nacara do meu pai” and celebrates passing UNESP in “gente passei na unesp quitudes”.
- Emotionally open: Shares feelings of sadness, stress, and love openly, such as missing friends and groups in “gente to muito love com esse grupo de mogi guaçu mds” and worrying about her future in “meu coracao ta tao apertado eu queria sabe o que ta acontecendo”.
- Supportive friend: Talks about specific friends with care and in-jokes, like feeling bad leaving Luiz alone on the first day of class in “gente me adoece saber q é primeiro dia de aula e eu to deixando meu luiz sozinho” and missing friends from Mogi Guaçu in “sdd dos meus guaçu 😡😡”.
- Humorous commentator: Uses sarcasm and exaggeration to narrate daily life, like the chaotic bus story in “O COBRADOR DE SANTO ANTONIO DE PUSSYVTAVA FALANDO MAL DO MOTORISTA DO 612…” and joking about academic validation in “as vezes me arrependo de não ter ido pro cotuca, mas lembro de como nao vale a pena eu entrar em estado depressivo de novo so por validação acadêmica”.
Weaknesses:
- Self-destructive talk: Makes repeated references to killing herself or wanting to die under stress, e.g. “se eu me matar nao tenho q fzer nenhuma escola” and “minha vida ta muito brutal acho q vou me endar”.
- Hostile humor: Uses violent or aggressive jokes toward others, such as “amanha vou sair dando tiro em favelado” and telling an ex to “enfia sua cabeça no forno”.
- Prejudiced language: Occasionally uses slurs or hostile language toward groups and celebrities, like “parem de ser fã do bts!!!!!! sao todos viados!!!!” and harsh hate toward artists in “rappa charts misogino #hate em massa”.
- Stress reactivity: Responds to school, work, and bureaucratic issues with intense emotional spikes, as seen in the panic over not being enrolled in school in “ferias estao acabando, nao tenho material e nem to matriculada em nada” and the bus pass problem in “fui pedir meu passe de onibus e simplesmente nao foi aceito pq nao to matriculada em nada JSSSSSSSS”.
- Harsh judgment: Often expresses strong negative judgments of others, such as calling someone an “irritante do caraio” in “menina para de forçar intimidade com qm voce nao tem menina irritsnte do caraio” and saying she feels disgust toward a girl in “eu to com NOJO dessa menina fujoshi”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
They most closely match Lisa Simpson: sharp, emotional, politically/opinionated, and academically driven but frequently overwhelmed. Like Lisa, they care a lot about studies and future prospects while feeling crushed by the pressure, e.g. worrying about school and entrance exams in tweets like “ferias estao acabando, nao tenho material e nem to matriculada em nada” and dreaming about academia and public universities in “ansiosa pra passar em todas as faculdades publicas de sao paulo e regiao so pra jogar nacara do meu pai”. They have strong moral reactions and social opinions (even if expressed in a chaotic, shitpost way), such as calling out misogyny in “rappa charts misogino #hate em massa” and venting about harassment at school in “preferia qnd eu era excluida do que assediada jesus”. At the same time, they’re very online, obsessive about their fandoms, and prone to melodramatic spirals – Lisa-coded intensity – like “minha vida ta muito brutal acho q vou me endar” and “deus pf faz eu receber esse email de aprovacao eu to quase me matando”. Their mix of cynicism, sensitivity, and trying to be a high-achiever in a messy environment is classic Lisa energy, just filtered through a very 2020s Brazilian stan-Twitter lens.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
They lean Extraverted: they’re highly social, constantly talking about friends, school, work, buses, and public drama, and use Twitter as an emotional outlet rather than a private diary, e.g. “gente to muito love with esse grupo de mogi guaçu mds” and “gente entrando um ajudante tao pocuxo, tao educadinho mds adoro funcionario novo”. They read as iNtuitive rather than purely Sensing: beyond concrete complaints, they spin situations into broader emotional or dramatic narratives like “as vezes me arrependo de não ter ido pro cotuca, mas lembro de como nao vale a pena eu entrar em estado depressivo de novo so por validação acadêmica” and idealize futures, e.g. “ansiosa pra passar em todas as faculdades publicas de sao paulo e regiao so pra jogar nacara do meu pai”. Their decision-making is strongly Feeling-based: posts are emotional, value-charged, and often centered on relationships, affection, and hurt—see “meu coracao ta tao apertado eu queria sabe o que ta acontecendo” and the contrastive rant about how different people treat them in “pra valentina eh nunca vou te odiar… ai pra nena eh vc me adoece…”. They look more Perceiving than Judging: their life feels chaotic and improvisational (no school, late decisions, money stress, working and studying at once), and they react in the moment instead of presenting structured plans, e.g. “ferias estao acabando, nao tenho material e nem to matriculada em nada” and “fui pedir meu passe de onibus e simplesmente nao foi aceito pq nao to matriculada em nada JSSSSSSSS”. The mix of intense social energy, humor, emotional expressiveness, and messy, possibility-oriented lifestyle fits ENFP more than other types.
Some pickup lines for you
- You said you’d rather be excluded than harassed at school… so how about I respectfully exclude you from all that and include you only in dates where the only thing we study is which pastel place in Campinas is the best?
- You’re out here dragging misogynistic rappers and calling the Grammy ‘FLOPADERRIMO’, stanning BTS and KATSEYE… can I audition to be the next man you *don’t* drag and maybe your personal War of Hormone era boy?
- You keep tweeting that your life is ‘brutal’ and joking about not wanting to study, but you’re passing UNESP and planning to study abroad—can I be the supportive namorada 2.0 who brings you snacks, defends you from peruas, and celebrates every acceptance letter with you?
- Every time you complain about the 612 bus and your pass not being accepted, I just think: forget public transport—let me be your fast track from ‘mofando na casa da vee’ to ‘mofando na minha cama ouvindo RPWP e Billie’ instead.
- You said you only manage to like about seven friends without wanting to kill them—challenge accepted: let me be number eight and the first one you’d actually consider keeping in your uterus-level favorites list.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Part-time worker, future UNESP student, full-time girl complaining about buses & loving my girlfriend. Once asked to explain omegaverse at a birthday party.– @gurlwatever
Your signature cocktail
Blue Razz Breakdown Spritz
The Blue raspberry vodka is a nod to their vaped-out, slightly chaotic vibe and love for flavored clouds like “kkk gosto mae desse cheirinho de quarto blue razz ice v400 40k buff puff ignite two flavors?”. An espresso shot goes in for the exhausted worker-student grind of “chega dessa vuda de trabalhadora e estudante quero ir ora casa e deitar com a minha mukhe😢😢😢”, fueling both shifts and midnight stan wars. Pink grapefruit soda brings a sharp, slightly bitter fizz for their acidez when dragging idols and flops, like “megan = hit nicki = shit” and “TODO HATE EM APT EH POUCO”. A swirl of salted caramel syrup softens everything, representing the unexpectedly sweet loyalty to friends and mozi in “te amo mozi” and “gente to muito love with esse grupo de mogi guaçu mds”. Finally, the lime wedge is squeezed over the top for that cutting, dramatic edge and suicidal humor in “se eu me matar nao tenho q fzer nenhuma escola” and “deus pf faz eu receber esse email de aprovacao eu to quase me matando”, turning the whole drink into a sparkling, unfiltered timeline in a glass.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
They consistently show sharp ambition and a desire to prove themselves, like when they say they’re “ansiosa pra passar em todas as faculdades publicas de sao paulo e regiao so pra jogar nacara do meu pai” “ansiosa pra passar em todas as faculdades publicas de sao paulo e regiao so pra jogar nacara do meu pai”, which is textbook Slytherin "I’ll win and you’ll see" energy. There’s a strong streak of ruthless, dark humor and willingness to attack others (even if hyperbolic) in tweets like “amanha vou sair dando tiro em favelado” and “2 meses passaram tao rapido vou explodir floripa e todos seus moradores”, pointing to an aggressive, confrontational style rather than Gryffindor idealism or Hufflepuff softness. They’re also very comfortable with targeted hate and rivalry, especially in stan culture: “passa tempo fav eh dar hate em grupo flop q se acha” and “rappa charts misogino #hate em massa” show someone who relishes strategy, sides, and winning. Even their coping with stress leans into self-preservation via dramatic, manipulative humor, e.g. “se eu me matar nao tenho q fzer nenhuma escola” and “deus pf faz eu receber esse email de aprovacao eu to quase me matando”, framing emotional stakes around success and escape. While they clearly care about friends and a girlfriend, the dominant pattern is ambitious, cutting, and competitive—a better fit for Slytherin than the more earnest or studious houses.
Your movie
Your song
bad guy - Billie Eilish
They’re openly a Billie fan and even joke about spreading wild rumors during the copycat era, saying they used to tell friends that Billie “had killed her mom” when the song came out: “lembro aqui quando a billie lançou copycat e eu saia espalhando desinformaçao pras minhas amigas…”. Their sense of humor is dark and chaotic, mixing suicidal jokes with sarcasm, like “se eu me matar nao tenho q fzer nenhuma escola” and “amanha vou sair dando tiro em favelado”, which fits the tongue‑in‑cheek villainous vibe of bad guy. They’re also constantly throwing shade and doing playful hate, such as “megan = hit nicki = shit” and “passa tempo fav eh dar hate em grupo flop q se acha”, matching the song’s confident, mocking tone. At the same time, there’s underlying vulnerability about school, work, and mental health, like “as vezes me arrependo de não ter ido pro cotuca, mas lembro de como nao vale a pena eu entrar em estado depressivo de novo”, which parallels how bad guy masks insecurity with bravado. All of this makes bad guy a strong fit for their mix of dark humor, emotional intensity, and chaotic internet persona.
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