Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Academic Diligence: She stays “locked in” to her studies in political science, psychology, and economics despite personal struggles.
- Linguistic Ambition: She is dedicated to “language learning” and communicates in “en/sp/cn”.
- Cultural Knowledge: She shows a deep appreciation for “80s music” and frequently references The Smiths and Trainspotting.
- Social Awareness: She identifies and critiques “racist” comments made by peers in her political science seminars.
- Goal Oriented: She utilizes “accountability threads” to track her daily steps and reading assignments.
Weaknesses:
- Disordered Eating: She frequently glamorizes “starving” and expresses a desire to return to an “underweight” state.
- Nicotine Dependency: She shows an urgent reliance on vaping, even celebrating when “VAPES ARE HERE”.
- Self-Deprecation: She views her own body with harsh negativity, calling her physical features “unsightly”.
- Validation Seeking: She relies on “validating” comments from others regarding her weight and looks to her mother for approval.
- Social Isolation: She admits that her habits make her “social skills so bad” and often chooses to “rot” alone.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
They most closely resemble Lisa Simpson: smart, politically aware, and deeply self-critical. Like Lisa, they’re academically driven and intense about studying, as seen in their 48-hour fast thread tied to productivity goals: “48h fast accountability thread 🪖💐 goals: 10k steps everyday as much water as possible finish my latin american economics readings finish my psychology readings finish my foreign language presentation/relearn everything i forgot finish my polisci readings” and “starving makes me sooo productive academically i've never been this locked in in my life but it makes my social skills so bad”. Their interest in politics and critical view of others’ prejudice is very Lisa-coded too: “Why are americans in political science so racist there's no way someone in my polisci seminar said 'latin americans have addictive personalities'”. The vegan/vegetarian arc and guilt around food also echo Lisa’s ethics and self-discipline, e.g. “trying to cut out dairy is brutal i miss greek yogurt so much” and “ur relapse aligning exactly with going vegetarian is such a move because i can tell everyone im eating little because i no longer eat meat”. Underneath the irony and dark humor, there’s a sensitive, overthinking, idealistic student trying to carve out an identity in a harsh environment, which is very much Lisa Simpson in a college-aged, edtwt, Latina form.
Your MBTI personality Type
INFP
Angel displays Introversion (I) through a focus on internal struggles and solitary 'rotting' in a dorm room, evidenced by “When ur rotting in ur dorm room”. Their Intuition (N) is highlighted by a focus on symbolic meanings and future possibilities, such as “i can't wait to study abroad in a city and live in Civilisationnnn” and their deep connection to the lyrics of The Smiths. The Feeling (F) preference is clear through highly emotional, self-critical venting and a focus on personal values, seen in “i know my ed is back bc i'm glad i don't have a valentine”. Finally, they align with Perceiving (P) due to a spontaneous, reactive tweeting style and a lack of rigid structure, often “Crashing out on twt” rather than following a set plan.
Some pickup lines for you
- Are you a 200-year-old dorm room floor? Because you’ve got me leaning so hard I can’t even think straight.
- Forget JP Morgan, I’d rather invest all my time in a seminar with you—I promise I’m way more progressive than a Polisci major.
- Is your name Morrisey? Because there is a light that never goes out when I see you on my feed.
- I’d braved the cloudy dorm water and the frozen hair just to bring you a Biscoff vape and some silken tofu.
- I might not be a horrifying vegan documentary, but I’m still hoping I can be the one thing you don't want to fast from.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
19-year-old Polisci student & language enthusiast. Aspiring to study abroad and find the world’s best vegan tofu bowl. If I’m not in the gym, I’m at the library.– @haciendakgs
Your signature cocktail
The Smiths’ Bitter Civilization
This drink is high-strung and 'locked in,' mirroring how “starving makes me sooo productive academically”. The minty chill represents the freezing dorm life where her “hair froze from how cold it is outside,” while the tofu brine nods to her “vegetarian relapse.” The vitamin gummy rim is a chaotic tribute to her “funniest binge” involving her mom's stash. Finally, it’s garnished with a plantain chip for her Latina roots, serving as a bitter-sweet toast to her feeling like she “just haven't earned it yet, baby.”
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Angel’s focus on status and achievement, particularly through her obsession with her “J.P. Morgan internship” and being “locked in” academically, aligns with Slytherin’s ambition and drive. Her resourcefulness is evident in her use of vegetarianism as a “move” to mask her behavior, demonstrating a cunning approach to self-preservation. She displays a sharp, often biting wit when critiquing others, such as noting “these ppls boyfriends r so ugly”, reflecting the house's characteristic exclusivity. Furthermore, her fixation on physical transformation and regaining her “lw of 47kg” highlights a goal-oriented mindset rooted in personal perfection and control.
Your movie
Your song
Some Girls Are Bigger Than Others - The Smiths
As a self-proclaimed fan of The Smiths who claims they “have a song for every single horrible situation” she has been in, this track perfectly encapsulates her fixations. The user directly references the lyrics when she writes, “as antony said to cleopatra as he opened a crate of ale: 'oh, i say... some girls are bigger than others'”, mirroring her own body dysmorphia and constant comparisons. Her feed is a blend of 80s music appreciation and a deep-seated struggle with her weight, often tweeting things like “i swear to god my butt by itself weighs 30kg and it's so unsightly”. The song’s melancholic yet jangly tone matches her “crashing out on twt” persona, bridging the gap between her academic life as a poly-sci student and her “extremely disordered” habits.
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