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Hatrcantread

Hatrcantread

480 followers
Age:
22

City:
Linköping, Sweden

Job:
Trainee

In a relationship:
No

Best friend:
Drew

Politically:
Left-wing

green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain

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Illustration image - Your MBTI personality Type

Your MBTI personality Type

ENTP

Kalashnikovkamraten embodies ENTP: extraverted, intuitive, thinking, perceiving. His extraversion shines in his humorous and engaging tweets ('Being a horse at a party...'). Intuition drives his creative and absurd ideas, like 'abolish the distinction between town and country by eliminating towns.' His thinking side critiques logically, as seen in his comments on Swedish history ('Sweden has a very interesting history regarding not being nationalist'). Perceiving keeps him adaptable, evident in his resourceful approach to homeownership ('Managed to complete the house and get a tenant...'). He's a witty debater who thrives on chaos and creativity.

Illustration image - Your Simpsons character

Your Simpsons character

Bart Simpson

Kalashnikovkamraten shares Bart Simpson's mischievous and sarcastic nature. His tweet about scamming an Irish lady ('Managed to complete the house and get a tenant...') mirrors Bart's penchant for troublemaking. His absurd humor, like 'Being a horse at a party and someone brings out Ketamine...', aligns with Bart's love for ridiculous antics. Both have a rebellious streak, evident in Kalashnikovkamraten's disdain for obligations ('Why does life gotta have obligations and distractions?'). They'd bond over pranks and chaos.

Illustration image - Strengths and Weaknesses

Strengths and Weaknesses

Strengths:

  • Humorous: His ability to craft absurd jokes like 'Being a horse at a party and someone brings out Ketamine...' reflects his comedic flair.
  • Culturally Engaged: His tweets about Swedish traditions like National Day ('Glad Nationaldag!') show his appreciation for local culture.
  • Strategic Thinker: His approach to gaming in Hearts of Iron IV ('My tanks design? Realistic! My expansion? Logical!') showcases his analytical mindset.
  • Politically Aware: Comments like 'Sweden and Norway should take up the mantle as the new 'great melting pot'' highlight his interest in societal and political issues.
  • Resourceful: His ability to secure a tenant and manage homeownership using unemployment benefits ('Managed to complete the house and get a tenant...') demonstrates resourcefulness.

Weaknesses:

  • Procrastination: His lament about obligations ('Why does life gotta have obligations and distractions?') suggests a tendency to avoid responsibilities.
  • Sarcasm Overload: His heavily sarcastic tone ('abolish the distinction between town and country by eliminating towns') might alienate more straightforward individuals.
  • Indecisiveness: His tweet about not wanting to drive for a burger ('Really wanna go get a burger... but I don't wanna drive...') reflects indecisiveness.
  • Overcritical: His critique of modern tech ('I don't want my car doing any of these things') shows a tendency to overly scrutinize innovations.
  • Isolationist: His complaint about spending midsummer with family ('Att man måste hänga med familjen på midsommar asså') suggests a preference for solitude.
Illustration image - Your 5 Emojis

Your 5 Emojis

  • 🎮

    His frequent mentions of gaming, like War Thunder and Hearts of Iron IV, make this emoji a perfect fit.

  • 🇸🇪

    His love for Swedish culture and traditions, such as National Day, aligns with this emoji.

  • 🍔

    Tweets about burgers ('I think I am going to get a burger before work') highlight his fondness for food.

  • 💻

    His interest in tech and gaming, as seen in his critiques of modern innovations, matches this emoji.

  • 🤣

    His sarcastic and absurd humor, like 'Being a horse at a party...', makes this emoji a great representation.

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Illustration image - Your new Twitter bio

Your new Twitter bio

22 | Regimepilled & sarcastic gamer | Aspiring bureaucrat with long hair 🇸🇪 | Swedish quirks, political jabs, and absurd humor | War Thunder, HOI4, and Nationaldag vibes | DM for snus recommendations!– @Hatrcantread
Illustration image - Your signature cocktail

Your signature cocktail

Regimepilled Mixer

Vodka
Trocadero
Lime Juice
Swedish Snus Garnish

The 'Regimepilled Mixer' captures Kalashnikovkamraten's Swedish quirks and sarcastic humor. Vodka represents his love for celebrating ('Glad Nationaldag!'), while Trocadero adds a local touch. Lime juice gives it a zesty kick, matching his sharp wit ('abolish the distinction between town and country'). The snus garnish ties it to his cultural identity, as seen in tweets like 'Shoutout to Poland for electing its first snusing president.' It's a bold and uniquely Swedish concoction.

Illustration image - Your Hogwarts House

Your Hogwarts House

Slytherin

Kalashnikovkamraten fits Slytherin with his resourcefulness and cunning, as seen in his tweet about securing a tenant and managing homeownership creatively ('Managed to complete the house...'). His sarcastic humor ('abolish the distinction between town and country by eliminating towns') reflects Slytherin's sharp wit. Additionally, his ambition to become a mid-level bureaucrat ('aspiring mid-level bureaucrat') aligns with Slytherin's drive for success. While he lacks Gryffindor's bravery, his strategic and self-serving tendencies make him a quintessential Slytherin.

Illustration image - Your movie

Your movie

Fight Club

Fight Club suits Kalashnikovkamraten's mix of sarcasm, rebellion, and existential musings. His tweet 'Why does life gotta have obligations and distractions?' echoes the film's critique of societal norms. His absurd humor, like 'Being a horse at a party and someone brings out Ketamine...', fits the movie's chaotic energy. Additionally, his disdain for modern tech ('I don't want my car doing any of these things') matches the anti-consumerist themes of Fight Club. He'd thrive in its anarchic, rule-breaking world.

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Illustration image - Your song

Your song

Boulevard of Broken Dreams - Green Day

This song's introspective and slightly rebellious tone fits Kalashnikovkamraten's personality. His lament about obligations ('Why does life gotta have obligations and distractions?') echoes the song's theme of walking a lonely road. His sarcastic humor, like 'abolish the distinction between town and country by eliminating towns,' matches its edgy vibe. Additionally, his preference for solitude ('Att man måste hänga med familjen på midsommar asså') aligns with the song's introspective lyrics. It's an anthem for his quirky, self-reflective nature.

Illustration image - Your time travel destination

Your time travel destination

1940s Sweden

Kalashnikovkamraten would thrive in 1940s Sweden during World War II, where neutrality and political intrigue were at their peak. His interest in Swedish history ('Sweden has a very interesting history regarding not being nationalist') aligns with this era's unique stance. He could larp his Hearts of Iron IV strategies ('My biggest bottleneck in hoi4 is that I larp too much') in real life. Additionally, his sarcastic humor would fit the cautious yet quirky national mood. He'd be a bureaucratic mastermind navigating neutrality with flair.

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Illustration image - Your video game

Your video game

Hearts of Iron IV

Kalashnikovkamraten's love for strategy games, particularly Hearts of Iron IV ('My biggest bottleneck in hoi4 is that I larp too much'), makes this game a perfect match. His focus on realism and logical expansion in gameplay mirrors the game's historical and strategic depth. His sarcastic humor, like 'abolish the distinction between town and country by eliminating towns,' aligns with the game's potential for absurd scenarios. He'd excel at crafting intricate strategies while adding his own quirky twists.

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Illustration image - Your spirit animal

Your spirit animal

Fox

Kalashnikovkamraten's spirit animal is a fox—clever, resourceful, and mischievous. His tweet about scamming an Irish lady ('Managed to complete the house and get a tenant...') demonstrates fox-like cunning. His sarcastic humor, like 'abolish the distinction between town and country by eliminating towns,' reflects their wit. Additionally, his ability to adapt, as seen in his creative approach to responsibilities, mirrors a fox's survival skills. Foxes thrive in chaos, just like Kalashnikovkamraten.

Illustration image - Some pickup lines for you

Some pickup lines for you

  • Are you a Hearts of Iron IV campaign? Because I'd larp too much just to keep you realistic and democratic!
  • Are you a Swedish midsummer tradition? Because I'd rather be with you than my family!
  • Is your name Trocadero? Because you make every Nationaldag worth celebrating!
  • Are you a War Thunder plane? Because you've reached the peak of my heart's tech tree!
  • Girl, you're like my favorite burger joint—worth the drive to Mjölby every time!
Illustration image - Your (un)funny joke

Your (un)funny joke

Why did Kalashnikovkamraten bring a map to the pizzeria? Because he wanted to ensure his burger expansion was logical and democratic!

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Illustration image - Your superpower

Your superpower

Absurdist Reality Manipulation

Kalashnikovkamraten would excel at 'Absurdist Reality Manipulation,' allowing him to reshape the world with his sarcastic and quirky ideas. His tweet 'abolish the distinction between town and country by eliminating towns' reflects his knack for absurd yet oddly logical concepts. He could create a world where obligations disappear, as he laments in 'Why does life gotta have obligations and distractions?' This power would let him turn mundane tasks into humorous adventures, like scamming an Irish lady ('Managed to complete the house and get a tenant...'). It's a perfect match for his chaotic creativity.

Illustration image - Your fictional best friend

Your fictional best friend

Deadpool

Kalashnikovkamraten and Deadpool would be the ultimate sarcastic duo. His absurd humor, like 'Being a horse at a party and someone brings out Ketamine...', matches Deadpool's chaotic wit. Both share a disdain for societal norms, evident in Kalashnikovkamraten's critique of obligations ('Why does life gotta have obligations and distractions?'). They'd bond over ridiculous antics and dark humor, creating chaos wherever they go. Their shared love for absurdity makes them a perfect pair.

Illustration image - Your dream vacation

Your dream vacation

Reykjavik, Iceland

Reykjavik's mix of quirky culture and scenic solitude suits Kalashnikovkamraten's personality. His preference for solitude ('Att man måste hänga med familjen på midsommar asså') aligns with Iceland's peaceful vibe. The city's unique traditions and humor would resonate with his sarcastic edge ('abolish the distinction between town and country by eliminating towns'). Additionally, Reykjavik's gaming cafes and creative spirit complement his love for gaming and absurd ideas. It's a perfect blend of relaxation and inspiration.

Illustration image - Your alternate career path

Your alternate career path

Satirical Columnist

Kalashnikovkamraten's sharp wit and absurd humor would shine as a satirical columnist. His tweet 'abolish the distinction between town and country by eliminating towns' showcases his knack for blending humor with critique. His observations on Swedish quirks ('Sweden has a very interesting history regarding not being nationalist') would make for hilarious yet insightful commentary. He'd excel at turning mundane topics into laugh-out-loud articles, engaging readers with his unique perspective.

Illustration image - Your celebrity match

Your celebrity match

John Oliver

Kalashnikovkamraten shares John Oliver's blend of sarcasm, humor, and political critique. His tweet 'Sweden has a very interesting history regarding not being nationalist' mirrors Oliver's ability to dissect societal norms with wit. His absurd humor, like 'Being a horse at a party and someone brings out Ketamine...', matches Oliver's knack for turning the ridiculous into comedy gold. Both have a sharp edge and a love for blending humor with insight, making them kindred spirits.

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