Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Passionate fan: Shows strong emotional investment in football and local teams, e.g. long rants about Morelia being moved and sold in “Hijos de su puta madre, me quitaron a mi equipo…” and “Vayan y chinguen a su puta madre neta, el Morelia llevaba 30 años en primera…”.
- Cultural enthusiast: Engages deeply with music, comics, and literature, praising Oasis, Cage the Elephant, Alan Moore, and Don Quixote in tweets like “Oasis es la mejor banda del universo”, “Telescope de Cage the elephant…”, and “Jugó la selección? Ni me enteré, estuve todo el día leyendo el Quijote”.
- Humorous voice: Uses absurd or exaggerated jokes to comment on situations, like “Ese balón lo saco diosito porque no aprueba el incesto” and comparing a sandwich to Mordecai and Rigby fighting a Lovecraftian entity in “Es el tipo de sandwich por el que Mordecai y Rigby arriesgarian sus vidas…”.
- Social awareness: Shows concern about social issues and violence, e.g. condemning fan violence in “Vi el perfil de la señora que murió en Torreón… váyanse a chingar a su madre todos” and criticizing xenophobia in California in “Que cagadero se está haciendo en California pq los gringos no quieren mexicanos…”.
- Literary interest: Shows curiosity about books and authors, referencing Kafka and José Emilio Pacheco in “‘Cuando Gregor Samsa descubrió que se había convertido en un insecto…’” and “Muchos de los libros de José Emilio Pacheco tienen alguna relación de ese estilo”.
Weaknesses:
- Insult-heavy language: Frequently uses direct insults and profanity toward others, e.g. “Pendejos”, “Puta vieja estúpida”, and “Trejo y Sancho son un par de pendejos”.
- Aggressive hostility: Sometimes escalates to extreme or violent rhetoric, such as “Bombardeen estados unidos” and repeated calls like “Ya duermanlos como a los perritos” directed at teams or groups.
- Sexist tone: Uses derogatory terms about women, e.g. “Pinche vieja arrastrada y huele pedos” and “Puta vieja estúpida”.
- Religious disrespect: Expresses hostility toward religious symbols in a way that can alienate believers, e.g. “Cuando fui al catecismo nunca me dijeron que a la virgencita le mamaba abandonar animales y tirar cuetes”.
- Impulsive reactions: Often tweets in-the-moment rage about sports and politics, like “Que internet tan CULERO tiene @Telecable_Mich” and “Nombre y comentario de pendejo, cromale la riata al presidente…”, which can overshadow more thoughtful points.
Your Simpsons character
Bart Simpson
The user most closely matches Bart Simpson: irreverent, impulsive, and always ready to insult or troll. Their timeline is full of gleefully aggressive one-liners like “Pendejos”, “Pinche vieja arrastrada y huele pedos”, and “Nombre y comentario de pendejo, cromale la riata al presidente tantito más…”, which fit Bart’s troublemaker energy. Like Bart, he’s obsessed with sports and uses them as a vehicle for jokes and rage, constantly talking about soccer and Morelia, e.g. “Por dios, que experiencia tan sidosa es ver jugar al Morelia.” and “Vayan y chinguen a su puta madre neta, el Morelia llevaba 30 años en primera y nos lo quitaron para esto?”. There’s also that adolescent vibe of wanting to be edgy and funny online, seen in lines like “Bombardeen estados unidos” and “Quitenle a los gringos el derecho a opinar”. At the same time, his bio “Twittero promedio Escritor en potencia estudiante mediocre” hints at a self-aware, slightly underachieving teen very much in Bart’s spirit.
Your MBTI personality Type
INTP
They lean introvert over extrovert: they talk about solitary activities like reading “Jugó la selección? Ni me enteré, estuve todo el día leyendo el Quijote” and consuming media, and their bio 'Twittero promedio Escritor en potencia estudiante mediocre' suggests self-reflection more than a need for social spotlight. Their interests and comments show an Intuitive style: they enjoy literature and meta-ideas about stories and comics, e.g. “Un detalle que todos pasan por alto en watchmen es por qué Dave Gibbons dibujo a mis papás peleando en la máscara de Rorschach” and “Alan Moore es lo mejor que le pasó a los cómics”, as well as broader cultural observations like “Que cagadero se está haciendo en California pq los gringos no quieren mexicanos en la ciudad de LOS ANGELES...”. Their tone is strongly Thinking: they are blunt, often insulting or sarcastic instead of diplomatic, as in “Pinche argumento todo estúpido”, “Puta vieja estúpida”, and “Vayan y chinguen a su puta madre neta...”, focusing on criticism and perceived logic rather than harmony. The Perceiving side shows in their spontaneity and lack of structured, planned persona: they jump topics (football, WWE, politics, music, literature) impulsively, make off-the-cuff commitments like “Me comprometo desde este instante a si se cumple irme a encuerar a las tarascas...”, and embrace a chaotic, reactive style of tweeting such as “AHORITA ESTOY PA VERGUEARME GENTE”. Overall, their introspective media-nerd vibe, focus on concepts and commentary, sharp critical humor, and improvisational approach to life and Twitter align best with an INTP profile.
Some pickup lines for you
- You say Oasis is the best band in the universe and that they’re the best thing that’s happened in your ‘fokin’ life… so if I buy you a beer and we put on ‘Telescope’ after, does that at least earn me a spot in your top 5?
- You went to catechism and still ended up worshipping Alan Moore, Watchmen and Spider‑Man Blue—clearly you have taste. Want to come over and debate if Moore really *is* the best thing to happen to comics, or should we just skip to the part where we kiss like a tragic Spidey romance?
- You complain about Morelia, the bebote being ‘salado’, and that watching your team is ‘sidoso’… let me be the first match of your life you don’t end up disappointed with. I promise more goals than your club and less drama than your timeline.
- You said you skipped the national team because you were reading Don Quixote—since you already like tilting at windmills, how about we try the most impossible quest of all: two mediocre students in Morelia going on a surprisingly great first date?
- You call yourself a ‘promedio twittero, escritor en potencia y estudiante mediocre’ but your rants about Oasis, WWE, and Monarcas have more narrative arc than half the biopics you can’t get into at 17—can I be your plot twist and co‑star in the movie where you finally get that happy ending?
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
From Morelia, caught between Oasis lyrics, Monarcas heartbreak and wrestling hot takes. Once missed a movie for being 17; still overanalyzing comics.– @HectorMadrig4l
Your signature cocktail
Oasis & Outrage Highball
This drink starts with mezcal joven, because it has to hit as hard and unfiltered as his language and football rants, like when he goes off at TV providers and owners: “Que internet tan CULERO tiene @Telecable_Mich” and “Vayan y chinguen a su puta madre neta, el Morelia llevaba 30 años en primera y nos lo quitaron para esto?”. Tamarind syrup with chili brings that sweet-sour melancholy and emotional punch of music and books he loves, from Oasis and Cage the Elephant to Ed Maverick, as in “Oasis es lo mejor que me ha pasado en toda mi fokin vida” and “Telescope de Cage the elephant probablemente sea una de las canciones más hermosas que he escuchado”. Fresh lime juice keeps it sharp and acidic, like his constant, cutting commentary on fútbol and life, e.g. “Por dios, que experiencia tan sidosa es ver jugar al Morelia.”. A splash of dark beer nods to his nights of wrestling, fútbol and cinema obsession, grounding the drink in something bitter and grown-up while he still tweets about getting blocked from an 18+ movie: “Fui al cine a ver el biopic de Robbie Williams... y no pude entrar porque tengo 17.”. Finally, the sea salt and crushed chili rim represents the constant edge and insult-laced humor he coats everything with, from telling people to shut up to full-blown rants like “Cállate a la verga” and “Puta vieja estúpida”. Strong, spicy, a bit bitter, but addictively honest—this highball is basically his timeline in a glass.
Your Hogwarts House
Gryffindor
The dominant traits in these tweets are blunt courage, moral outrage, and a tendency to charge straight at conflict, which are classic Gryffindor qualities. He openly calls out what he sees as injustice or stupidity, even aggressively, like when he rants against the owners who moved his football club: “Vayan y chinguen a su puta madre neta, el Morelia llevaba 30 años en primera y nos lo quitaron para esto?” and “Hijos de su puta madre, me quitaron a mi equipo nomás para que el proyecto sea un fracaso…”. That same instinct to stand up for what he feels is right appears in broader contexts too, like his anger over xenophobia in California: “Que cagadero se está haciendo en California pq los gringos no quieren mexicanos en la ciudad de LOS ANGELES…” and his reaction to violence in football: “le cambiaron la vida en una semana solamente por un equipo de fútbol y nadie hará nada, váyanse a chingar a su madre todos”. He’s impulsive and performatively bold, promising wild acts for his team: “Me comprometo desde este instante a si se cumple irme a encuerar a las tarascas con el escudo pintado en el pecho”, which shows the reckless bravado typical of Gryffindor more than calculating Slytherin ambition. While he clearly enjoys books and music, his tone is more fiery than cerebral; the defining pattern is confronting others head‑on and loudly defending what he cares about, aligning him most strongly with Gryffindor.
Your movie
Your song
Cigarettes & Alcohol - Oasis
The best fit is “Cigarettes & Alcohol” because it matches both their Oasis obsession and their cynical, sharp-edged humor. They repeatedly declare their love for the band, saying “Oasis is the best band in the universe” and “Oasis is the best thing that has ever happened in my whole fookin life”, and even joke about “post-Oasis depression”. The song’s themes of frustration, boredom, and looking for escape line up with their constant rants about football, like calling watching Morelia a “shitty experience” and raging that their team was sold off (“they took my team just so the project could be a failure”). Lyrically, the track’s mix of disillusionment and swagger fits someone who quotes literature (“I spent all day reading Don Quixote”) but tweets with unapologetic aggression like “go fuck yourselves seriously” and “bomb the United States”. Their whole persona is very Oasis-core: sarcastic, combative, football-obsessed, and clinging to music as a lifeline, which is exactly the energy of Cigarettes & Alcohol.
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