
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Requiem mirrors Bart Simpson’s rebellious, chaotic energy and frequent clashes with authority, specifically seen in their complaints about bus drivers and school rules. Just as Bart is often in trouble, the user captures this defiant spirit by posting, “dawg can the bus drivers get off my ass about having my feet on the seats”. They share a similar hyper-fixated and impulsive nature, moving quickly between intense hobbies like VR, web design, and gaming, much like Bart’s various short-lived schemes. Their aggressive yet colorful vocabulary, such as shouting “PICK A FUCKING LANE DIPSHIT”, perfectly encapsulates the iconic Eat My Shorts attitude of Springfield's favorite troublemaker. Ultimately, both characters navigate their teen years with a mix of snarky humor and genuine, albeit messy, loyalty to their close friends.

Your MBTI personality Type
Requiem exhibits Extraversion through constant, energetic interaction with others, frequently “messaging him every like 20 minutes” and yapping until they “pass the fuck out”. Their Intuitive nature is shown in a fixation on abstract concepts and fictive identities, such as their “Karkat fictive” status and intense interest in media like Iron Lung. They lead with Feeling, making emotionally charged posts about how “love feels like a panic attack” and expressing deep empathy or frustration. Finally, their Perceiving trait is evident in a spontaneous, disorganized lifestyle, whether it's complaining about the “swipe up to open feature” or impulsively “eating breakfast pizza” despite being lactose intolerant.

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Your new Twitter bio
Aspiring culinary student and web design enthusiast. When I’m not analyzing cinema or fixing Strawpages, I’m probably losing a battle with my screen protector.– @hermitsrequiem

Your signature cocktail
This drink captures the chaotic, high-energy vibe of a 'very disordered' Homestuck fan who is deeply in love and fueled by caffeine. The dark base represents their emo aesthetic, specifically the struggle of having to “dig through TEN FUCJING BLACK SHIRTS” to find the right look. The spicy kick mirrors their aggressive typing style, seen when they scream “PICK A FUCKING LANE DIPSHIT” at traffic. Finally, the sweet strawberry float honors their rare soft side when “momis letting mr have their leftober sushi and a strawberry milk for dinner”, while the glitter represents the Karkat fictive within their system who thinks about their “space game” all night.

Your Hogwarts House
Requiem demonstrates a strong sense of self-preservation and selectivity, explicitly filtering their social circle with a “DARKSHIP DNI” and emphasizing loyalty only to a chosen few. Their resourcefulness and ambition are channeled into niche interests like web design, as seen when they mention “making oomfs strawpage(ifucking LOVE web desifnoh my god im a fucjing nerd”. They show a cunning, protective streak toward their own peace, admitting they “Will Not develop any attachhments” to avoid vulnerability. Furthermore, their disdain for those they perceive as beneath them or outsiders, such as the “rich ass kids at my school”, aligns with the Slytherin tendency toward sharp social observations and tribalism. This combination of technical craft, self-interest, and a guarded social hierarchy makes them a perfect fit for the house of the serpent.

Your movie

Your song
Requiem embodies the chaotic, angst-ridden energy of teenage rebellion and neurodivergence, frequently posting about school struggles and social friction, such as when they complained, “dawg can the bus drivers get off my ass about having my feet on the seats”. Their obsession with emo culture and specifically My Chemical Romance is evident in their excitement over “fanart of karkat as gerard demolition lovers era”. The song's themes of feeling misunderstood and the friction between youth and authority resonate with their vent-heavy timeline, including moments where they feel like they might be “tweaking out”. Ultimately, their self-described “emo” identity and frequent mentions of being “mentally ill” align perfectly with the high-octane, theatrical angst found in this iconic track.

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hermitsrequiem
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