
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Like the perennially miserable tavern owner, @heyasucks exhibits a deep sense of self-loathing and social isolation, frequently questioning his own worth. He shares Moe's dark, cynical outlook on life, often posting about feeling like a “worthless parasite on society” or a “pathetic no one”. Much like Moe's recurring holiday despair, he greeted the new year by looking for “new reasons to kill myself”. Despite this gloom, he maintains a niche interest in firearms and military tech, similar to Moe's occasional glimpses into a shady or underground past. Ultimately, his tendency to “slowly force myself to isolate from social spaces” mirrors Moe’s lonely existence in The Simpsons.

Your MBTI personality Type
@heyasucks exhibits Introversion and Perceiving through their self-imposed social isolation and lack of structured planning, admitting they are “slowly forcing myself to isolate from social spaces” and “losing my fucking marbles” under pressure. Their Intuition and Feeling are evident in their deep, identity-focused emotional distress and rejection of social norms, such as when they claim to be a “worthless parasite on society who does nothing of value”. They prioritize raw emotional expression over objective logic, frequently venting that “at this point is there any reason to continue living”. This combination suggests an INFP who is struggling with a dark “Fi-Si loop,” characterized by intense self-criticism and a withdrawal into a “shithole” environment while clinging to niche interests like gaming and military tech.

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Your new Twitter bio
California-based 3D artist and Roblox Studio developer. Passionate about military history, flight sims, and FPS titles. Here for the tech, not the algorithms.– @heyasucks

Your signature cocktail
This drink is high-octane and deeply bitter, reflecting a user who admits to “untreated mental illness” and a lifestyle of “losing my fucking marbles.” The cold brew provides the twitchy energy of a gamer waiting for “MARATHON” to drop, while the silver luster dust nods to their interest in “aluminum spaced armor plate” and military tech. It’s served strong and dark, much like their outlook on “that one shithole below canada,” and the sunken cherry represents the feeling of being a “worthless parasite on society.” It’s the perfect sip for someone who claims “new year new reasons to kill myself,” delivering a punch as heavy as a “round of 8mm lebel.”

Your Hogwarts House
Despite his intense self-deprecation, @heyasucks demonstrates a sharp, cynical resourcefulness and a preoccupation with self-preservation and status within social hierarchies. He exhibits a biting wit and a willingness to use spite as a motivator, notably claiming he is “tempted to kill myself just to spite him” regarding a critic. His focus on legacy and professional utility is evident in his desire for a system “to show off my studio work without feeding it to the evil csem creating ai”, showing a protective instinct over his intellectual property. Furthermore, his frustration with social standing is a recurring theme, as seen when he laments watching others “get hit tweets left and right while i sit here with an average of less than one view per hour”, revealing an underlying ambition for recognition. Ultimately, his protective isolationism and dark, calculated humor align him more with the ambition and self-interest of Slytherin than the other houses.

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The user’s feed is defined by deep self-loathing and a sense of alienation, mirroring the song's themes of feeling like an outsider who doesn't belong. He explicitly describes himself as a “worthless parasite on society” and a “stupid fat ugly y chromosome having ass”, capturing the same visceral insecurity found in the lyrics. His constant social isolation is evident when he claims to be “forcing myself to isolate from social spaces” because he feels unwanted. This persistent belief that he is “a pathetic no one” makes Creep an apt anthem for his current mental state and online persona.

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heyasucks
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