
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
The overall mix of irreverence, trolling, and surprisingly sharp observation fits Bart Simpson best. The user is constantly needling others and stirring the pot, like when they mock Twitter moralizing in politics and culture, e.g. “Vira e mexe nessa rede social as pessoas forçam uma interação mentirosa pra seguirem uma cartilha que acham conveniente” and “Twitter deve ser o único lugar do mundo que você fala 'Um nativo de um país tem mais conhecimento sobre aquele país que twitteiro médio' e vai ter gente pra te CONTRARIAR”. There’s a juvenile, sometimes cruel edge to the humor — like “Eu sou favorável que prostitutas não devem ter direito a opinião Devia ter um jeito de bloquear essa gente da internet” or the gleeful football banter in “Palmeiras estragando a resenha da rapaziada” — that mirrors Bart’s tendency to go too far with pranks and insults. At the same time, he occasionally shows thoughtfulness about politics, economics, and society, such as in “Estabilidade econômica é oq mantém o 'nazismo' afastado” or the urban planning comment “Planejamento urbano de qualidade… Automóvel é legal e tals mas nunca deveria ser a primeira opção”, similar to the moments when Bart reveals he’s smarter and more reflective than he lets on. His mix of sports fandom, gaming/anime obsession, and chaotic humor, seen in tweets like “Gostaria de atualizar minha opinião sobre Blue Lock… finge que é battle shounen e que as partidas são lutas, o troço até que fica legal”, completes the picture of an edgy, mischievous, but occasionally insightful Bart-like personality.

Your MBTI personality Type
They read as more introverted (I) than extroverted: most posts revolve around solitary interests like manga, anime, gym, and running, e.g. detailing long visual novel hours in “simply to exemplify how brutal visual novels are… 10 hours in Tsuki…” and solo training like “1h de treino + 20 mim de caminhada Exercitem se, senhores. É relaxante, muito bom.”, with little emphasis on large social circles or needing others’ attention. Their thinking is strongly intuitive (N): they often generalize from specific events to broader patterns or systems, such as connecting economic conditions to extremism in “Estabilidade econômica é oq mantém o 'nazismo' afastado… Se você quer que sua população não seja radicalizada, primeiro dê poder de compra.” and analyzing urbanism in “Planejamento urbano de qualidade… metrô de fácil acesso conectando a cidade inteira, o que evita a necessidade de carros.”. The tone is clearly thinking (T) over feeling: they argue in a blunt, logical way even when it’s harsh, like “Vocês nem escondem mais que querem defender a elite burguesa brasileira… Não é sobre oq é melhor pra quem é pobre.” and “Comunidade gamer só dá leigo, é impressionante.”, prioritizing critique over harmony. They also show a structured, judgment-heavy way of viewing the world, consistent with judging (J): they like clear evaluations and firm stances about politics, football management cycles, and media, as in “E voltamos a estaca 0 >Treinador começa bem >Cai de rendimento >Terrível no Estadual >Pedem a cabeça dele” and systematic lists like “Obras lidas/assistidas/jogadas que eu gostei em 2025 Em ordem, aos (talvez) interessados Favoritos: 1 Yona/Breaking Bad…”. The combination of introverted media/gym focus, abstract systemic analysis, logical bluntness, and structured judgments about society, sports, and art fits best with INTJ.

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Your new Twitter bio
São Paulo FC sufferer, manga binge-reader & gym enjoyer. Once ran 7km a day, now I just try not to miss leg day or a Blue Lock chapter.– @heysatirohere

Your signature cocktail
This cocktail swaps the classic gin for cachaça infused with espresso, a nod to his Brazilian roots and grind mindset, from running and lifting — “Exercitem se, senhores. É relaxante, muito bom.” and “Teve um período desse ano que eu corria pelo menos 5km por dia”. The Campari bitterness represents his unapologetically acid takes on politics, football and society, like “Favela é uma merda. Fato.” and “Eu sou favorável que prostitutas não devem ter direito a opinião”. Sweet vermouth brings a subtle sweetness under the bite, echoing his quieter, reflective side in tweets about anime/mangá and flow, such as “Gosto que Blue Lock trata o estado de 'flow' como atributo major das partidas”. A dash of smoky peated whisky symbolizes the constant chaos, drama and ‘resenha’ around São Paulo FC and Brazilian football — “Resenha máxima a corja administrativa do São Paulo cair” and “Resenha acabou. É isso, valeu”. Finally, the orange twist adds a sharp aromatic top note, like his ironic punchlines and meme energy in posts such as “Fortvrines lol lel kek sosia wtf” and the self‑deprecating “O mundo gira agora q eu literalmente me pareço com isso”. Strong, bitter, stylish and a bit experimental, this is a drink that, like his bio, says: you did your worst, you tried your best — now it's time to rest.

Your Hogwarts House
Their timeline shows strong ambition, competitiveness, and a hard-edged, survivalist worldview typical of Slytherin. They repeatedly talk about self‑improvement in a results‑oriented way, like wanting to bulk up and hit a specific goal weight in “60kg > 70kg colocar mais 10kg na carcaça e eu acho que tá bom” and describing intense training habits in “Teve um período desse ano que eu corria pelo menos 5km por dia… Depois comecei a vagabundear, parei de correr e relaxei. Tentarei voltar logo mais, mas por enquanto vou continuar focado na musculação mesmo”. Their political takes are blunt, power‑centric, and often ruthless, for instance saying a dictator “preferencialmente podia até ser morto” in “Maduro ser preso (preferencialmente podia até ser morto) é uma vitória para os Venezuelanos e para América Latina como um todo” and mocking the overuse of the term fascism while openly wishing for a much harsher Mussolini in “Academia é fascismo. Eu torço fortemente que a Itália produza um Mussolini 50x pior que o original”. They show a strong appreciation for hierarchy, order, and civilizational strength, crediting strict social control as a reason some countries are "sociedades civilizadas" in “O motivo (e mt +) que a Europa e China/JP etc se desenvolveram como sociedades civilizadas é q eles passaram 90% da própria história castrando até os menores atos anti civilizatório possíveis”. Even in hobbies like Blue Lock they gravitate to themes of ego, talent, and winning, praising how it frames the "estado de 'flow'" as a key attribute in high‑level competition in “Gosto que Blue Lock trata o estado de 'flow' como atributo major das partidas… faz parte de qualquer atividade esportiva de alto nível”. This mix of ambition, admiration for strength and order, and a sharp, often ruthless way of talking about people and politics aligns much more closely with Slytherin than with the other houses.

Your movie

Your song
A fitting song for them is Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day because it mixes cynicism with perseverance, much like their timeline. Their bio, “You did your worst, you tried your best. Now it's time to rest”, has the same exhausted but self-aware tone as the song’s narrator walking alone after giving their all. They frequently show disillusionment with politics and society, like when they say “SOBERANIA é oficialmente a palavra que eu mais odeio… É soberanamente DISFUNCIONAL esse país, isso sim” and “São mais de 40 mil homicídios por ano… Um dos piores poder de compra da américa latina”, echoing the song’s atmosphere of walking through a ruined landscape. At the same time, they keep pushing through life with gym, running and self-improvement — e.g. “60kg > 70kg colocar mais 10kg na carcaça e eu acho que tá bom” and “Bom dia pós natal 1h de treino + 20 mim de caminhada Exercitem se, senhores” — which matches the song’s stubborn forward motion despite everything. There’s also a strong sense of individualism and walking their own path in opinions on anime, football, politics and culture, like when they state “Vocês se fazem de burros pra defenderem um ponto imbecil” and “Twitter deve ser o único lugar do mundo que você fala 'Um nativo de um país tem mais conhecimento sobre aquele país que twitteiro médio' e vai ter gente pra te CONTRARIAR”, which fits perfectly with the chorus line "I walk a lonely road". Overall, the blend of bitterness, humor, isolation and resilience in their tweets mirrors the emotional core of this song.

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