Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Academic ambition: Maintains a high workload by “go to trade school work take ap courses” despite mental health struggles.
- Protective empathy: Advocates against “shaming her for trying to make a change” regarding an obese woman's fitness journey.
- Loyal partner: Frequently expresses deep affection, stating “I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND” and calling him an angel.
- Vocal honesty: Openly shares their experiences with “schizoeffective” disorder to find community.
- Artistic appreciation: Shows strong passion for media like South Park and music, noting “ph my godd she can sing”.
Weaknesses:
- Self-harm tendencies: Repeatedly posts about the “urge to make mt banner a pgoto of my scars” and active cutting.
- Severe insecurity: Struggles with a fear of abandonment, asking “if he hates me after he has told me a million times” otherwise.
- Disordered eating: Engages in harmful behaviors like “fatspo” and asking about the effects of purging.
- Hostile rhetoric: Uses aggressive language, such as telling others to “get hit by a bus or two”.
- Impulsive reactivity: Threatens self-harm to get a corporate response, tweeting “relapse records respond to my email or im goijgnto hurt myseld”.
Your Simpsons character
Milhouse Van Houten
Much like Milhouse, Dean exhibits an intense, often desperate reliance on his social bonds and a profound fear of being alone, frequently tweeting things like “im so terrified im goijgnto be alone again”. He shares Milhouse’s tendency toward extreme emotional volatility and a self-deprecating nature, notably when he describes himself as “fat and ugly and a chud larp fakecel”. His fixation on niche interests like South Park and his struggle to fit in—evidenced by the claim “o have to tey so hard to make and keep friends”—mirrors Milhouse’s status as a perpetual outsider. Ultimately, his mix of intense devotion to his partner and his frequent existential crises aligns with the tragicomic, needy energy of Springfield's most famous sidekick.
Your MBTI personality Type
INFP
Dean demonstrates a strong Introverted (I) and Perceiving (P) nature through his focus on solitary coping mechanisms and chaotic daily life, such as “how it feels so smoke weed and cut myself and watch south park for 22 hours of out the day” and “i dont want to be freinds with anyone talking to people is so tiring”. His Intuitive (N) side is reflected in his deep immersion in fandom subcultures and symbolic identification with fictional characters, seen when he mentions “how it feels to be schizoeffective and kin tweek”. Finally, his Feeling (F) preference is dominant, as his tweets are almost entirely driven by intense emotional shifts, seeking reassurance, and a preoccupation with his personal relationships, exemplified by “i want to ask for reasurrance rhat hebsrill loves me but its so fucking embarrassing”.
Some pickup lines for you
- Are you the South Park fandom in 2021? Because I never want to DTTM (Don't Talk To Me) when I'm with you.
- I promise I’m way more 'metal' than a nu metal fan—I'd never let Relapse Records send you a broken album.
- Are we in a trade school classroom? Because I’m ready to ignore all my AP courses just to inject some discourse into your brain.
- I’m not a cat, but I’d gladly be two CDs long if it meant I could be the angel you post about on Twitter.
- Forget the 10-piece McDonald's nuggets—you’re the only thing on my mind that’s a perfect 10.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Memphis-based trade school student and AP scholar. Passionate about early 2010s scrapbooking aesthetics and South Park lore. Ask me about my 10,000-song playlist!– @humancentiipede
Your signature cocktail
The South Park Styro-Spritz
This cocktail is an experimental, bitter mess that mirrors Dean’s chaotic digital footprint. The Absinthe base captures the energy of someone who kins Tweek and claims to “be schizoeffective”, while the aggressive red hue reflects a feed obsessed with “sh photos” and “cutting myself”. The drink is unapologetically harsh, much like his stance that “christians and right wingers r possibly the most retard people in existence”. It serves as a liquid tribute to his niche interests, specifically his desire to be an “androgynous boygirl gogo dancer”, finished with a sharp edge that matches his “favorite razors”.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Dean exhibits the Slytherin traits of self-preservation and a fiercely selective loyalty to his own 'niche,' often viewing outsiders with disdain as seen when he tweets, “im just gonna stop interactinf with people outside of my niche on twt cus youre all stupid”. His ambition is channeled through a heavy focus on personal identity and status within subcultures, exemplified by his claim of being “on a level” others are not. He demonstrates resourcefulness and a drive for efficiency in his personal life, balancing being a “functional member of society” who takes AP courses while maintaining a sharp, often exclusionary wit. Ultimately, his protective nature over his 'found family' and his boyfriend, combined with a blunt rejection of those he deems inferior, aligns him with the house of ambition and exclusivity.
Your movie
Your song
People II: The Reckoning - AJJ
This song perfectly captures the user’s volatile mix of self-loathing, dependence on others, and obsession with their own mental health struggles. The lyrics mirror the user's feelings of isolation and fear of abandonment, seen when they post “im so terrified im goijgnto be alone again” and “i hate ymself”. The track's cynical view of society and focus on internal chaos aligns with their blunt social commentary, such as when they claim “christians and right wingers r possibly the most retard people in existence”. Ultimately, the song’s themes of finding brief comfort in small things amidst a 'mental breakdown' resonate with a user who oscillates between “i want 2 cut sooooo bad” and “i love my boyfrjend he is genuienyl an angel sent from heaven”.
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