ICBMinvestments
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Politically:
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Critical Thinker: John's tweet 'It’s fun when they do a study to confirm what anyone can tell you from living in the world' showcases his ability to question and analyze societal norms.
- Bold Humorist: His tweet 'Self-driving cars suck. Until I can fall asleep without it yelling at me, it’s not actually self-driving' reflects his sharp, humorous critique of modern technology.
- Visionary: John's bio 'A positive journalist/visionary' and tweets like 'The genocide is going to be massive...' show his focus on long-term societal impacts and foresight.
- Faith-Oriented: His tweet 'Jesus Christ rose from the dead on this day...' intertwines faith with modern commentary, reflecting a deep connection to religion.
- Self-Reliant: Changing his car oil himself, as shared in 'Changed the oil on my car,' demonstrates independence and a hands-on approach.
Weaknesses:
- Controversial Opinions: Tweets like 'Women that are super feminist are like incels that are super misogynist' can alienate some readers with their divisive tone.
- Nicotine Dependency: His tweet 'Sorry for crashing out, I’m going through nicotine withdrawals' reveals a struggle with nicotine addiction.
- Skeptical of Progress: Criticism of self-driving cars in 'Self-driving cars suck...' suggests resistance to incomplete advancements.
- Provocative Language: Statements like 'It’s okay to be a Nazi for a little bit...' can be seen as unnecessarily provocative, even in jest.
- Pessimistic Outlook: His tweet about impending genocide and societal collapse reflects a tendency toward pessimism.
Your Simpsons character
Mr. Burns
John's sharp, sometimes cynical worldview mirrors Mr. Burns' personality. His tweet 'Harvard would rather die, than end its anti-white racism. Which is why Harvard must die' reflects a ruthless critique of institutions. Like Mr. Burns, John has a knack for controversial statements, such as 'It’s okay to be a Nazi for a little bit.' Both characters have a tendency to provoke and challenge societal norms, albeit in different contexts.
Your MBTI personality Type
INTJ
John's tweets reflect INTJ traits: introverted, intuitive, thinking, and judging. His analytical nature shines in 'Math isn’t hierarchical it’s relational.' Intuition drives his visionary outlook, as seen in 'The genocide is going to be massive...' Thinking is evident in his logical critiques, like 'Harvard would rather die, than end its anti-white racism.' Judging appears in his structured opinions, such as 'Having too many liberal friends past the age of 25 means you’re making really bad decisions.'
Some pickup lines for you
- Are you Norway? Because I'd journal every moment with you.
- Do you believe in math being relational? Because I feel the equation between us is perfect.
- Are you like self-driving cars? Because I can't stop thinking about you, even when I'm asleep!
- Do you change oil as well as you change the way I see the world?
- Are you a visionary journalist? Because you've written yourself into my heart.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Journalist & cultural critic | Norway enthusiast 🇳🇴 | Exploring the intersection of faith, politics, and humor | Changing oil, challenging norms | Sarcasm is my second language.– @ICBMinvestments
Your signature cocktail
Nordic Vision
The 'Nordic Vision' reflects John's love for Norway and sharp, refreshing personality. Aquavit ties to his Norway enthusiasm, while lemon juice adds a tart edge, mirroring his biting humor in 'Self-driving cars suck.' Cloudberry syrup represents his unique and visionary ideas, as seen in 'Math isn’t hierarchical it’s relational.' Club soda brings a light, effervescent finish, capturing his occasional humorous takes, like 'Coachella is boomer coded now.'
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
John's sharp wit, ambition, and unapologetic nature align with Slytherin traits. His tweet 'Having too many liberal friends past the age of 25 means you’re making really bad decisions with your life' reflects a strategic and critical approach to relationships. His controversial opinions, such as 'Women that are super feminist are like incels that are super misogynist,' show boldness and a willingness to challenge norms, even at the risk of alienation. Like many Slytherins, he values independence, as demonstrated by 'Changed the oil on my car.'
Your movie
Your song
Sympathy for the Devil - The Rolling Stones
This song's blend of provocative lyrics and commentary on humanity suits John's controversial and analytical nature. His tweet 'It’s okay to be a Nazi for a little bit...' reflects the song's exploration of morality and societal judgment. The sarcastic tone in 'Self-driving cars suck...' aligns with the song's ironic storytelling. 'Sympathy for the Devil' captures his nuanced and unapologetic approach to complex issues.
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