Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Emotionally-expressive: Openly shares feelings like anxiety, annoyance and affection, e.g., “hj estou com mal pressentimento (como sempre)” and “eu vou chora”.
- Humor-oriented: Uses jokes and exaggeration to comment on life and football, such as “piada kkkkkkkkkkkkk” and the dramatic praise of Cruzeiro in “a magnitude e a grandeza que o cruzeiro esporte clube expressa…”.
- Direct-communicator: Speaks very directly about what she likes or hates, e.g., “odeio gente mal educada” and “deus me abençoe nessa prova pq so ele mesmo pra me ajudar”.
- Playfully-ironic: Uses irony and self-mockery, like “melhor mal acompanhada doq sozinha” and “eu sou é vagabundo eu gosto é de vadiar muito obrigado ✌️”.
- Passionate-fan: Shows strong loyalty and enthusiasm for her team and players, e.g., “mateus pereira te amo mas vc é fominha demais” and the long Cruzeiro praise in “não tem condição a magnitude e a grandeza que o cruzeiro esporte clube expressa…”.
Weaknesses:
- Aggressively-reactive: Often responds to frustration with strong insults, like “a vai se fuder vai tomar no seu cu morre praga te odeio” and “qro q ele va tomar no cu fodase”.
- Self-destructive: Uses language about death and self-harm when upset, e.g., “quero uma corda pra eu me enforcar” and “eu quero morrer”.
- Harshly-judgmental: Frequently calls others “burra”, “piranha” or “chatinha”, such as “nao tenho paciência pra gente BURRA” and “noooossa essa menina é chatinha einn”.
- Hostile-language: Uses offensive or demeaning terms, including toward groups, as in “e a filha da puta ama ser lanche de bandido” and “Grande bosta! KKKKKKKKK duas piranhas passivas, patéticas”.
- Low-frustration-tolerance: Gets intensely irritated by small inconveniences, like “esqueci meu fone porra merda caralho”, “não consigo colocar música no meu instagram que desgraça hein” and “nunca acordei com tanto raiva quanto hj vsf pau no cu dessa escola”.
Your Simpsons character
Bart Simpson
This user most closely matches Bart Simpson: loud, irreverent, impulsive, and constantly oscillating between chaos and dark humor. Like Bart roasting everyone around him, they’re always cursing people out and talking trash, as in “nao tenho paciência pra gente BURRA” and “a vai se fuder vai tomar no seu cu morre praga te odeio”. There’s a gleeful delight in mischief, visible in tweets like “viva a pirataria” and the proudly chaotic “eu sou é vagabundo eu gosto é de vadiar muito obrigado ✌️”. They show adolescent angst and dramatic negativity similar to Bart’s more vulnerable side with “eu quero morrer” and “sera q eu tenho mesmo q passar por essas coisas”, but it’s wrapped in sarcasm and exaggeration. The constant complaints about school and people, such as “nunca acordei com tanto raiva quanto hj vsf pau no cu dessa escola”, echo Bart’s rebellious student persona. Overall, the mix of profanity, drama, humor, and troublemaking fits Bart far better than the more responsible or earnest Simpsons characters.
Your MBTI personality Type
ESTP
They come across as strongly extroverted: they constantly comment on people around them, school, games, and social drama, e.g. “essa escola n presta pra nada paralisou terça quarta quinta e n pode emendar com a sexta” and “amo esses gays”, and they seem energized by interaction, conflict, and joking rather than withdrawn reflection. Their focus is very concrete and sensory (S), centered on immediate experiences like hair, clothes, games, and physical surroundings: “to indo menstruada e de calça branca pra escola pq quem me protege n dorme” and “sentei justo no lugar q pega internet deus esta em todas as coisas” both show attention to tangible, here-and-now details rather than abstract theory. The tone is blunt, cutting, and often insult-driven, suggesting Thinking (T) over Feeling: they say things like “nao tenho paciência pra gente BURRA” and “esse homem é feio DEMAIS chega a ser impressionante”, prioritizing direct judgments over diplomacy or harmony. Their lifestyle appears spontaneous and reactive rather than structured, consistent with Perceiving (P): they swear about forgetting headphones “esqueci meu fone porra merda caralho”, complain in the moment about school and people, and rarely talk about organized plans or long-term structure. Overall, this mix of high-energy social engagement, focus on immediate sensations, sharp-tongued logical/critical evaluations, and go-with-the-flow improvisation best fits ESTP.
Some pickup lines for you
- You said you’re going to school ‘menstruada e de calça branca’ because ‘quem me protege não dorme’… can I apply for the job of personal protector, or is that position exclusively reserved for God and Cruzeiro?
- You: ‘tenho pavor de homem’. Also you: ‘melhor mal acompanhada doq sozinha’. Me: what if we test a third option—well‑accompanied, watching Cruzeiro, you teaching me Letterboxd while we pirate a movie ‘viva a pirataria’ style?
- You get mad at that player for being ‘fominha’ and at the boy who only posts edits and heavy trap, but then derrete for the one who plays violão and watches Ice Age… good news: I play more attention than trap, more violão than edits, and I’d rather watch Ice Age with you than any final.
- For someone who keeps tweeting ‘eu quero morrer’, ‘quero uma corda pra eu me enforcar’ and ‘sera q eu tenho mesmo q passar por essas coisas’, you’re awfully committed to surviving every game of that ‘ridículo’ Cruzeiro and every ‘menino loiro’ that irritates you… let me be the plot twist that finally makes your Monday feel as good as that ‘segunda-feira já tá boa assim’.
- You hate your hair, your school, ‘gente BURRA’, ‘gente mal educada’, happy people, and half of Santa Luzia, but still find poetry in ‘o andar do liso é tristr’ and in a TV delay after a Cruzeiro goal—if your standards are that chaotic, I think there’s a beautiful chance you might accidentally fall for me too.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
BH, student & football addict. Survived white pants at school while on my period—after that, I can handle anything. Opinions, sarcasm & Cruzeiro.– @igoncalvessz
Your signature cocktail
Belo Horizonte Hot Mess Spritz
This drink starts with cachaça infused with chili to match her aggressive, zero‑filter rage like "a vai se fuder vai tomar no seu cu morre praga te odeio" and "se acha daora entao ta tudo certo prefiro nao ser depósito de porra". The blue curaçao is a nod to her Cruzeiro obsession and dramatic praise like "não tem condição a magnitude e a grandeza que o cruzeiro esporte clube expressa em todos esses continentes e planetas intergalácticos". Guaraná soda keeps the energy chaotic and teenage‑hyper, echoing her school complaints and constant annoyance such as "nunca acordei com tanto raiva quanto hj vsf pau no cu dessa escola". Fresh lime juice brings sharp acidity for her brutal honesty in tweets like "esse homem é feio DEMAIS chega a ser impressionante" and "noooossa essa menina é chatinha einn". Finally, a salt rim with crushed candy reflects her mix of bitterness and sweetness: she begs for divine help in "deus me abençoe nessa prova pq so ele mesmo pra me ajudar" and "oh meu pai me ajude", even while yelling "vamo desgraça" at life, school, and football.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
The strongest throughline in her tweets is sharp, self‑protective aggression, which fits Slytherin’s resourcefulness and focus on self‑preservation more than any other house. When she feels disrespected or crossed, she goes immediately to verbal attack, e.g. “a vai se fuder vai tomar no seu cu morre praga te odeio” and “a menina faz isso cmg todo dia e quando eu faço com ela fica reclamando vai tomar no cu piranha”, showing a reflex to hit back hard rather than endure or seek harmony. She repeatedly expresses contempt and superiority toward others, such as “nao tenho paciência pra gente BURRA” and “esse homem é feio DEMAIS chega a ser impressionante”, which is much more in line with Slytherin’s elitist streak than Hufflepuff’s kindness or Ravenclaw’s curiosity. There’s also a clear instinct for dark humor and moral flexibility, like celebrating piracy in “viva a pirataria” and making cutting jokes about others’ personal lives in “e a filha da puta ama ser lanche de bandido”. Even her misanthropy and desire to keep emotional distance — “tenho pavor de homem” and “esse povo feliz demais ta me irritando se matem” — point to a defensive, self‑focused worldview that matches Slytherin’s instinct to protect the self first. While there are flashes of passion and humor that could overlap with Gryffindor, the dominant pattern of ruthless clapbacks, contempt, and survival‑driven attitude makes Slytherin the best fit.
Your movie
Your song
bad attitude - girli
The song bad attitude by girli fits them because it channels the same chaotic, sweary, funny rage and zero-filter energy they show in tweets like "a vai se fuder vai tomar no seu cu morre praga te odeio" and "esqueci meu fone porra merda caralho". The track is about owning being messy, moody, and confrontational, which matches posts such as "nao tenho paciência pra gente BURRA" and "aii detesto gente q força amizade que chatice ein mana se enxerga". Their dark humor and dramatic flair, like "quero uma corda pra eu me enforcar" and "eu quero morrer", also line up with girli’s over-the-top emotional style. At the same time, they’re loud about what they love—football and Cruzeiro, as in "não tem condição a magnitude e a grandeza que o cruzeiro esporte clube expressa..."—which mirrors the song’s unapologetic self-expression. Overall, bad attitude captures their mix of irritation with people, self-deprecating humor, and proud, chaotic personality.
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