
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
The user most closely matches Bart Simpson: loud, chaotic, and constantly cracking horny or irreverent jokes while still being oddly lovable. Their timeline is full of over-the-top, boundary-pushing humor like “not even the power of the 7 seas combined could stop the trip to pound town i’m about to take Wuyang on” and “VAMPIRE RENATOOOOO I VANT TO SUCK UR COCK I MEAN BLOOD”, which fits Bart’s mischievous, immature energy. Like Bart, they thrive on attention and shock value, openly debating engagement tactics with tweets such as “i’m not getting likes on my tweets anymore should i tweet my boobs again” and “i need to start streaming again how do i get people to tune in do i start posting my boobs again”. At the same time, they show a sincere love for their hobbies and community—obsessing over games and characters, celebrating events, and excitedly announcing streams like “SPOOKY SEASON FINALLY COMING IM GONNA LOCK IN AND START STREAMING AGAIN SOON IM SO EXCITED”. The mix of juvenile humor, chaotic sexuality, pop‑culture obsession, and performative drama lines up far more with Bart than with more grounded characters like Marge, Lisa, or even Homer.

Your MBTI personality Type
They lean Extrovert because they clearly enjoy interaction, attention, and performance: they talk about streaming and inviting people in (“LIVE ON TWITCH FOR A BIT COME SAY HI IF U R BORED💙”, “IM LIVE ON TWITCH FOR A BIT COME SAY HI IF YOU WANT 💙”) and openly joke about tweeting their body for engagement (“i’m not getting likes on my tweets anymore should i tweet my boobs again”, “do i start posting my boobs again”). Their humor is imaginative and exaggerated, suggesting Intuition: they constantly speak in hyperbolic, fantastical scenarios (“i could easily solo vecna this is why the entity hasn’t taken me yet”, “i’d cause a 9.9 earthquake with the force of how fast i’d be thrusting back and forth”). They show a strong Feeling orientation, leading with emotional reactions, attachment to characters, and relational language rather than analytical breakdowns (“i am a leon kennedy fan before i am a person”, “coming back to dbd for my queen joyce just PLEASE don’t fuck up her face”). Finally, their lifestyle appears flexible and spontaneous, suggesting Perceiving: they repeatedly “forget” planned streams or playtime (“i lowkey forgot i was supposed to start streaming again”, “i keep forgetting to play dbd”) and talk about instinctively opening games out of boredom rather than following a schedule (“got off dbd only to be like ‘damn i’m bored’ and instinctively opened dbd again…”). These patterns together best fit ENFP: expressive, social, hyperbolic, emotionally driven, and loosely structured.

Some pickup lines for you

Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
24 • he/him • Horror + Dead by Daylight goblin, part-time Twitch streamer. Once tried to quit DBD and opened it again 5 minutes later.– @JakeNotPark

Your signature cocktail
This drink hits like a cracked solo queue survivor who swears “i could easily solo vecna”, so it starts with spiced dark rum for that confident, slightly unhinged strength. Black cherry liqueur brings the juicy, horny melodrama of someone who casually tweets “i’m so horny” and “idgaf which leon is in front of me he is getting some inches added to him”. Blood orange juice adds a horror-flavored tang for the DbD/Yellowjackets/Stranger Things fan who says “dbd yellowjackets chapter where they give us Natalie as the survivor and i p100 her and never play another character ever again” and still rants that the “stranger things finale was shit from an ass”. A splash of tonic water keeps it sharp and chaotic, like trying to stream while asking “do i start posting my boobs again” and realizing “i need to actually post gaming clips and stop horny posting about leon soon”. The smoked salt rim is for all the salty yet self-aware gay posting—see “something something i’m a f^g” and the legendary “VAMPIRE RENATOOOOO I VANT TO SUCK UR COCK I MEAN BLOOD”—leaving a lingering, addictive bite that makes you queue up ‘just one more match.’

Your Hogwarts House
Jake reads strongest as a chaotic, bold Gryffindor with a big-performer energy. He’s openly reckless and fearless in tone, constantly posturing as the main character or hero, like when he jokes about being too strong for the game’s god-entity in Dead by Daylight: “i could easily solo vecna this is why the entity hasn’t taken me yet bc she doesn’t know how to nerf me”, which is classic Gryffindor bravado and hero-complex humor. He leans into daring, often hypersexual jokes with zero shame, e.g. “call me dracula the way i’m about to drain this man of everything he’s got” and “not even the power of the 7 seas combined could stop the trip to pound town i’m about to take Wuyang on”, reflecting impulsiveness and a willingness to say the outrageous thing out loud. His relationship with streaming is also performance-driven rather than purely grind-driven: he talks about coming back to Twitch with an excited, showman vibe in “SPOOKY SEASON FINALLY COMING IM GONNA LOCK IN AND START STREAMING AGAIN SOON IM SO EXCITED” and hypes going live with “COME SAY HI” energy in “IM LIVE ON TWITCH FOR A BIT COME SAY HI IF YOU WANT 💙”, which fits a courageous, attention-facing Gryffindor temperament more than a reserved Ravenclaw or calculating Slytherin. While there are hints of loyalty (long-term attachment to favorite characters like Leon and Gabriel) and humor, the dominant throughline is loud, fearless, impulsive bravado—textbook Gryffindor chaos rather than the steadiness of Hufflepuff, intellectualism of Ravenclaw, or strategic self-preservation of Slytherin.

Your movie

Your song
A fitting song for Jake is Sex, Drugs, Etc. by Beach Weather, which balances horny, chaotic humor with a lonely, late-night gamer vibe. They constantly lean into overt sexual jokes and thirst, like when they say “idgaf which leon is in front of me he is getting some inches added to him” and “not even the power of the 7 seas combined could stop the trip to pound town i’m about to take Wuyang on”, matching the song’s indulgent, hedonistic energy. At the same time, their life clearly revolves around late-night gaming, streaming, and online obsession—posts like “got off dbd only to be like ‘damn i’m bored’ and instinctively opened dbd again…” and “i need to start streaming again how do i get people to tune in do i start posting my boobs again” echo the song’s restless, can’t-log-off insomnia. Their dramatic, hyper-online gay persona—seen in “something something i’m a f^g” and “my tweets about having say gex with dbd characters always get attention i’ve built the gayest audience ever”—aligns with the song’s mix of swagger and vulnerability. Overall, the track captures someone who jokes about sex nonstop, lives in their vices and fandoms, and stays terminally online, which suits Jake’s Dead by Daylight, horror, and thirst-post-filled timeline perfectly.

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JakeNotPark
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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