
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
They most closely match Bart Simpson: irreverent, sarcastic, constantly calling out bullshit, but still oddly loyal and sensitive about friendships. Like Bart, they go from gleefully hostile jokes — calling Roblox’s CEO out in posts like “hang david bazsucki upside down” and roasting communities in “roblox slap battles community is the worst roblox community outside of forsaken…” — to more vulnerable moments such as “softblocking oomf cuz they dogged me and i cried because of it”. Their timeline is full of chaotic bit-posting and petty blocks, like “blocking you just because you appeared on my page for no reason”, which fits Bart’s impulsive, confrontational nature. At the same time, they show a moral streak and strong sense of justice by exposing predators and groomers in posts like “here's unedited, uncropped DM logs with the minor you have groomed” and “Roblox youre hosting countless groomers and predators…”, echoing Bart’s tendency to blow up hypocrisy when he sees it. Even their self-deprecating edge — for example “got a flashback to the times when i wasnt a miserable fаggot and just liked and looked up to everyone on the internet” — feels like Bart’s mix of humor and buried insecurity rather than Lisa’s earnest introspection or Homer’s obliviousness.

Your MBTI personality Type
They seem more introverted (I) than extroverted: they talk about discomfort initiating contact and ignoring DMs, e.g. “please dm me first i feel like a weirdo if i DM someone first” and the cycle of logging on just to scroll and log off out of “pure hatred” in “open twitter ignore dms scroll until i see something to reply to pure hatred log off for tonight”. Their focus on patterns in communities, hypocrisy, and systemic issues over immediate sensory details points to intuition (N), as seen in takes like “geometry dash community trying not to be miserable assholes for 0.1 quattrosecond” and critique of Roblox’s design choices in “im (not) optimistic when your platform crumbles upon itself after adding ai age verification… you should have been banning pedophiles on roblox”. They clearly lean thinking (T) over feeling: arguments are framed in blunt, evaluative terms and moral logic rather than diplomatic wording, e.g. “roblox slap battles community is the worst roblox community” and “i will never kill myself or do sh because it will put me at the same level as some groomers”, which applies a harsh internal standard. Their tone toward others is often cutting and judgment-focused rather than harmony-seeking, as in “you are playing forsaken ofc there would be those type of people you MORON”. Finally, they fit judging (J) more than perceiving: they express strong, fixed stances on people and communities, block quickly (“blocking you just because you appeared on my page for no reason”), and talk about internal standards and guilt about not acting on “problematic” people in “how i feel during the day then get pissed off at myself for doing nothing about a problematic person i have loads of shit on”. Their combination of introversion, pattern-focused commentary, harsh logic, and decisive moral judgments aligns best with INTJ.

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Your new Twitter bio
Battle Cats enjoyer, Roblox/Twitter drama archivist, occasional artist. Once softblocked someone and cried about it instead of touching grass.– @jiiiiiiiiiiiiig

Your signature cocktail
Overproof dark rum stands in for their volatile, intense side and constant blocks, like when they say "blocking you just because you appeared on my page for no reason". Cold brew coffee concentrate captures the exhausted, terminally-online vibe of "open twitter ignore dms scroll until i see something to reply to pure hatred log off for tonight". Bitter-sour grapefruit juice mirrors their disgust at certain communities and platforms, such as "roblox slap battles community is the worst roblox community" and "Roblox youre hosting countless groomers and predators". Salted caramel syrup adds a hidden sweetness that reflects their softer, affectionate moments, like "merry christmas guys i give all oomfs a big smooch on the cheek" and offering to draw followers’ OCs in "if i get 140 followers ill draw some of you guys". A dash of chili bitters gives the drink a sharp kick, representing their righteous anger when calling out predators with "here's unedited, uncropped DM logs with the minor you have groomed" and their determination in "i will never kill myself or do sh because it will put me at the same level as some groomers". All together, the Pure Hatred Highball is strong, bitter-sweet, and slightly painful—exactly like doomscrolling their timeline while laughing at their shitposts.

Your Hogwarts House
They consistently show a confrontational sense of justice and willingness to publicly call out predators and groomers, which aligns strongly with Gryffindor’s bravery and moral courage. For example, they directly expose grooming behavior and name names, sharing evidence despite inevitable backlash: “here's unedited, uncropped DM logs with the minor you have groomed just in case you pull out the 'oh hes lying' card again” and “Roblox youre hosting countless groomers and predators like souldrivenlove, 14th user and the whole dollhouse hangout community”. They’re also explicit about refusing self-harm partly out of a defiant desire not to be like the people they oppose: “i will never kill myself or do sh because it will put me at the same level as some groomers”, which reflects the dramatic, values-driven mindset typical of Gryffindors. Their impulsive and aggressive reactions—like “hang david bazsucki upside down” and “saw my ex on the tf2 server hes currently admin on i never had such urges to call him slurs”—fit the house’s hot-headed, act-first nature. While they show some loyalty and self-deprecating humor, their defining traits are outspoken moral conviction, willingness to start fights over principle, and a flair for dramatic confrontation, all of which point most strongly to Gryffindor.

Your movie

Your song
A song that fits them well is I Hate Everything About You by Three Days Grace. Their timeline is fueled by intense annoyance and resentment, like when they say they open Twitter and “pure hatred log off for tonight” or call the Roblox slap battles community “the worst” while adding people who “jork it to roblox characters”. The song’s theme of conflict and fixation parallels how they keep receipts on predators, showing “unedited, uncropped DM logs with the minor you have groomed” and reminding people that an accuser used a document made by a “pedophile who had dated minors”. At the same time, their anger is mixed with vulnerability and self-loathing, like calling themselves a “miserable fаggot” and admitting they cry over being dogged so they “softblocking oomf cuz they dogged me and i cried because of it”. This combination of bitterness, hurt, and obsessive calling-out aligns closely with the song’s emotional push-pull of hate, fixation, and unresolved pain.

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