Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Humorous: Uses humor to cope with stress and bad days, like joking about having an objectively horrible day but being in a great mood for no reason in “eu to achando hilário que tô tendo um dia objetivamente horrível mas eu tô muito de bom humor”.
- Self-aware: Shows insight into own patterns and limits, e.g. recognizing academic struggles and TDHA/autism factors in “eu quando conto um pouquinho demais com o autismo e o ahsd pra ir bem numa prova” and discussing therapy topics like “amanhã minha psicóloga vai OUVIR”.
- Resilient: Keeps going despite setbacks in transport, health, and studies, such as enduring bad commutes and bureaucracy in “meu ônibus 15 minutos atrasado… pego um ônibus que vai dar rolé no aeroporto do Galeão” and still juggling work and college in “essa vida de trabalhar e estudar no noturno”.
- Affectionate: Expresses warmth toward friends, partner, and family, like planning to see Michi at Quinta da Boa Vista in “ver me tacar gente pro alto” and praising parents in “sou abençoado pq a minha família é a família que is what it's supposed to be like meus pais são muito divos”.
- Socially-conscious: Engages with issues like transphobia and social justice, such as criticizing repeated shallow takes on autistic girls in “eu não AGUENTO MAIS ver as pessoas repetindo essa grande reflexão inovadora de que meninas autistas 'não se comportam' da mesma forma que meninos autistas” and noting frequent transphobia on their timeline in “4 são transfobia velada ou escancarada”.
Weaknesses:
- Overcommitted: Frequently takes on too many tasks (work, college, cheer, extra projects) and complains of no time, e.g. “não tenho tempo pra peidar esse ano e acabaram de divulgar edital de movimento de educação popular” and being fully packed across days in “minha sexta sábado domingo estão totalmente empacotados de demandas”.
- Procrastination: Often postpones studying or tasks, then suffers later, as seen in “me passei muito esse final de semana... que o júpiter de ontem e hoje deixou pra depois” and not sitting to study chemistry in “adivinha quem mais um domingo não sentou pra estudar química ?”.
- Academic-disorganized: Struggles with planning for classes and exams, like pulling a difficult subject and regretting it in “quem foi que me deixou puxar química 2” and feeling like a bigger academic disaster this semester in “acho que eu nunca fui um desastre acadêmico tão grande quanto nesse semestre”.
- Emotionally-reactive: Responds strongly and explosively to stressors, especially transport and bureaucracy, using intense language like “empresa desgraçada maldita… que EXPLODAM” and getting furious with Detran and cartório errors in “o departamento estadual de trânsito do rio de janeiro conseguiu me tirar do sério ao ponto de eu ser passivo agressivo”.
- Self-neglecting: Tends to push health limits and ignore rest, like wanting to train despite being sick in “minha psicóloga... vc n vai no treino, né, vc vai descansar..? e eu 🙂↔️” and repeatedly complaining about many medications and ongoing illness in “não aguento mais tomar remédio nunca tomei tanto remédio na minha vida”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
They read as a very Lisa Simpson type: smart, overworked, politically and socially aware, and constantly juggling school, work, and causes. Like Lisa, they complain about academic stress but clearly care a lot, e.g. talking about being a 'disaster' this semester and a brutal chemistry class: “acho que eu nunca fui um desastre acadêmico tão grande quanto nesse semestre” and “morra química 2 MORRAAAA”. They’re involved with education and popular movements, even while exhausted, which is very Lisa-core activism: “acabaram de divulgar edital de movimento de educação popular no grupo de bio e eu fui ler com o dedo coçando”. The user is also socially conscious and critical about issues like gender, autism, and transphobia, echoing Lisa’s tendency to overthink and speak up: “eu não AGUENTO MAIS ver as pessoas repetindo essa grande reflexão inovadora de que meninas autistas 'não se comportam' da mesma forma que meninos autistas” and “de 5 tweets na minha tl 4 são transfobia velada ou escancarada”. At the same time, they balance their brainy, principled side with chaotic humor and self-deprecation — getting mad at buses and bureaucracy, yet making jokes about it — which fits Lisa’s mix of earnestness and snark: “caralho namoral acabou de dar 7h e eu já tomei no cu duas vezes” and “me passei muito esse final de semana pobre coitado do júpiter de segunda terça e quarta”.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENTP
They read as more Extraverted (E) than introverted: they constantly narrate social life (cheer practices, public transport, work, family, therapy) and seem energized by interaction and chaos, e.g. joking about being coerced into using Google Docs because of college culture in “fui coagido a começar a usar docs quando entrei na faculdade pq as pessoas só usam essa bosta aí acabei me acostumando. mas o word é meu queridinho” and gleefully recounting being approached by a non-binary person at Casas Pedro in “ganhei um prêmio de NB performático na minha cabeça”. Their humor and interests suggest iNtuition (N): they enjoy patterns and underlying ideas (like realizing multiple favorite anime share a studio in “meia noite eu conto pra vcs oq quase todos eles tem em comum”) and riffing on abstract reflections such as autism presentations in “eu não AGUENTO MAIS ver as pessoas repetindo essa grande reflexão inovadora de que meninas autistas 'não se comportam' da mesma forma que meninos autistas”. They lean Thinking (T) over Feeling: their complaints and opinions are blunt, analytical, and often critical (e.g. dissecting bad bus logistics in “meu ônibus 15 minutos atrasado… consigo fazer a burrada de pegar um ônibus que vai dar rolé no aeroporto do Galeão.” or evaluating professors’ grading logic in “o professor é brincalhão e tem o hábito de zerar a questão toda se vc responde algo errado”). The strong spontaneity and self‑described disorganization indicate Perceiving (P): they frequently procrastinate, improvise, or change plans last-minute, as in “me passei muito esse final de semana pobre coitado do júpiter de segunda terça e quarta que vai ter que fazer tudo que o júpiter de ontem e hoje deixou pra depois” and “adivinha quem mais um domingo não sentou pra estudar química ?”. The overall profile is a fast‑talking, humorous, argumentative, idea‑driven person who thrives in social environments but resists rigid structure, which best fits ENTP.
Some pickup lines for you
- If you can survive Stranger Things with your mom commenting every two seconds and still finish the season, I’m pretty sure you can survive a date with me complaining about Rio buses. We can bond over every 324 that ghosts us.
- You said you felt too hot to be stressing over that seminar because you’re ‘gostoso demais’—I fully agree. As a scientist, I’d like to run further experiments on this hypothesis over hibiscus cold brew sometime.
- You juggling cheer practice at Atlantis, uni, work, and CAPES not paying you yet, and STILL being ‘so stubbornly alive’ is frankly Olympic-level. I don’t want your time, I just want the honor of being squeezed into your already overbooked schedule for one coffee.
- Since antibiotics are a pyramid scheme and the BRT Transbrasil is a toxic relationship you hate to love, may I suggest a more sustainable alternative? One (1) low-side-effect companion, who will, unlike the 232, actually stop for you.
- You: accidentally grabbed book 3 instead of book 2 and went feral in the street. Me: volunteering as tribute to be the correctly numbered sequel in your life—chronologically coherent, mildly chaotic, and absolutely impossible to put down.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Cheer athlete, commuter warrior & biology student in Rio. Once grabbed the wrong book in the street and still made it to practice on time.– @jupterodactilo
Your signature cocktail
So Beautiful, So Stubbornly Alive Highball
The cachaça with hibiscus and sea salt is Rio in a glass: everyday BRTs, ônibus infernais and the oceanic nerd who knows about deep sea brine pools, echoing their mix of chaos and science from “meu ônibus 15 minutos atrasado...” and “existem sim piscinas e rios de água (extremamente salgada)...”. Dry tonic water keeps things sharp and a little bitter, like someone who complains about everything from IFCS bandejão to bus companies yet keeps going, as in “minha vida seria tão mais fácil se a comida do bandejão do IFCS não fosse tão ruim” and “empresa desgraçada maldita meu deus do céu esses filhas da puta diminuem frota de ônibus”. Lime juice with bitters is that punchy, overworked academic edge who will still drag themself to treino and therapy, captured in “não tenho tempo pra peidar esse ano...” and “amanhã minha psicóloga vai OUVIR”. Ginger syrup brings heat and resilience, like cheer practice, open gyms they’re dying to go to, and the stubborn refusal to stop even when sick, from “meu problema é que eu sou mt teimoso (não vou parar” and “o ciclo de eu falar pra minha psicóloga que tô doente e ela virar e perguntar então vc n vai no treino, né”. The frozen cheesecake garnish is an inside joke: dessert-as-almoço energy and the ability to find joy in scraps of sweetness, as seen in “às vezes cheesecake e torta de chocolate congelados da ceia de Natal é almoço” and the chaotic optimism of “eu to achando hilário que tô tendo um dia objetivamente horrível mas eu tô muito de bom humor”. This cocktail is strong but playful, a little bitter, a little sweet, and very NB-performático—just like someone who starts the year on loratadina and nimesulida yet still calls themself “so beautiful and so stubbornly alive.”
Your Hogwarts House
Hufflepuff
They consistently show a very Hufflepuff mix of loyalty, work ethic, and everyday kindness. They juggle work, night classes and demanding courses, while still cooking for themself and trying to do things 'right', as in “eu acho que mereço parabéns por ter levantado e ido fazer janta de verdade ao invés de comer miojo” and “essa vida de trabalhar e estudar no noturno tem me feito cometer atos criminosos com muita frequência (entrar no mercado faltando 10 minutos pra fechar ODEIO fazer isso”. Their loyalty to people and communities shows up everywhere: they complain that a friend’s thesis defense is blocking the truly important thing, going to cheer them on at practice in “que saco a defesa do mestrado está atrapalhando Michi a fazer as coisas que verdadeiramente importam (ir pra quinta da boa vista sábado de manhã me ver tacar gente pro alto”, and they’re genuinely proud that their cheer team is committed to being “the most homosexual team in Rio” in “gosto muito da gestão da atlantis pq estamos nos comprometemos em ser o time de cheer mais homossexual do rio de janeiro”, which reflects a strong sense of belonging and team spirit. They also show a quiet, grounded decency toward strangers: worrying about a confused elderly woman at a bus stop in “a pobre coitada da senhorinha no ponto da saída 9 da linha amarela [...] ainda tive que abandonar ela antes de ajudar a descobrir qual ônibus ela podia pegar pq meu ônibus chegou........”, and being thrown off by how badly other men treat their families compared to their own dad’s care in “não é como se eu não soubesse que homem é uma desgraça, mas a quantidade de absurdos que eu tô lendo [...] pq cresci com meu pai comendo por último fazendo questão de saber que os filhos e a esposa estavam satisfeitos”. While they have some Gryffindor-esque stubbornness and Ravenclaw curiosity (they geek out about oceanography in “tô me divertindo com isso aqui pq o vídeo é fake mas não ironicamente existem sim piscinas e rios de água (extremamente salgada) que não se mistura com o resto da água no fundo dos oceanos”), the throughline is a down‑to‑earth, hardworking, loyal, and fair-minded temperament that aligns most strongly with Hufflepuff.
Your movie
Your song
Tubthumping - Chumbawamba
A song about getting knocked down and getting back up again fits them almost perfectly. They constantly complain about buses, illness, and bureaucracy, yet keep going with humor and stubbornness, like when they say they had an objectively horrible day but were still in a great mood for no clear reason: “eu to achando hilário que tô tendo um dia objetivamente horrível mas eu tô muito de bom humor por algum motivo não identificável”. Their bio, “so beautiful and so stubbornly alive,” directly echoes the song’s central theme of resilience. Even overwhelmed with work, health, and studies, they push through and keep joking, as in “não tenho tempo pra peidar esse ano...” and “acho que eu nunca fui um desastre acadêmico tão grande quanto nesse semestre”. The track’s chaotic, defiant energy also matches their caps-lock rants about public transport and bureaucracy, like “CAPES ME PAGAAAAAAA” and “caralho namoral acabou de dar 7h e eu já tomei no cu duas vezes”. Overall, the messy, loud perseverance of Tubthumping aligns with their mix of exhaustion, humor, and refusal to stay down.
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