LieutenantRusty
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
The Sea Captain is the best Simpsons parallel: salty, nautical, loud, full of sea stories and salty aphorisms—just like Rusty’s stream of naval references ('Former USN Surface Warfare Officer', 'Tomcat Tuesday') and his love of whole‑hearted, seafaring imagery. Both are gruff, prone to bluster, and quick with a nautical quip; both also have a nostalgic, old‑school view of the world and delight in telling ridiculous, over‑the‑top seafaring tales. If you cross a machinist, a veteran and a movie buff, you get a modern Captain McCallister.

Your MBTI personality Type
ESTJ fits Rusty: extraverted in public engagement and social leadership (frequent replies, group showings: 'Showing a work buddy Alien and Aliens for the first time tonight'), sensing and detail‑oriented (machine parameters: '400,000 rpm, 24 ipm...'), thinking and blunt in decision‑making ('I don’t give a fuck if you think cows are holy. I think cows are tasty.'), and judging with a preference for order, tradition and decisive stances (military background: 'Former USN Surface Warfare Officer', nostalgic anchors like the '’04 ALCS' memory). Together, these tweets show someone pragmatic, organized, and comfortable enforcing rules or conventions rather than exploring endless hypotheticals.

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Your new Twitter bio
Mech Engineer • Former USN Surface Warfare Officer • Maker, machinist & gamer • Proudly blunt (self-described 'Certified Professional Irritable Jerk') • Wood‑chipper fan • Red Sox lifer • #fuckcancer — I fix things, tell it like it is, and bring the coffee.– @LieutenantRusty

Your signature cocktail
This drink pairs Rusty’s coffee and machinist leanings with a blunt, slightly smoky personality: coffee liqueur nods to his TSA coffee rant ('Had a 2lb bag of coffee... they ripped the bag'), bourbon supplies the gruff backbone of a 'Certified Professional Irritable Jerk', smoked salt evokes workshop grit and wood‑chipper enthusiasm, and a Captain’s Wafer garnish winks at the pricey snack gripe ('$2.16 / each for the Captain’s Wafers'). Precise ratios mirror his love of specific machining numbers ('400,000 rpm...'), so the cocktail is equal parts exacting and unapologetic.

Your Hogwarts House
Gryffindor fits Rusty because his tweets show a take‑charge, blunt bravery more than secretive cunning or detached intellectualism: he’s a 'Former USN Surface Warfare Officer' who loudly defends opinions and traditions and celebrates direct victories like the '’04 ALCS' memory. He routinely mocks opponents and is unafraid of confrontation ('Tankies remain coping and seething'), which reads as Gryffindor boldness. His DIY, get‑it‑done attitude (machining posts like '400,000 rpm...') is the practical courage of someone who’d rather act than theorize. He prizes honor and visible loyalty—hallmarks of Gryffindor—over subtle scheming.

Your movie

Your song
Joan Jett’s 'Bad Reputation' matches Rusty’s unapologetic, brash persona: he proudly calls himself an 'Irritable Jerk' and relishes being blunt ('I don’t give a fuck if you think cows are holy. I think cows are tasty.'), much like the song’s defiant refusal to follow social rules. The high‑energy, no‑care attitude pairs with his salty one‑liners and love of standing his ground in public discourse.

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