Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Loyal Friend: He shows genuine affection for his circle, referring to a friend as “the crazy one, how I love him”.
- Honest Critic: He provides unfiltered opinions on music, calling a new album “very mid if you are a fan of old Glosito”.
- Civic Responsibility: He condemns people who act 'street' but disrespect workers, stating “be respectful and save work for the poor employee”.
- Academic Persistence: Despite his chaotic persona, he successfully “passed everything” in his studies.
- Cultural Passion: He is deeply invested in local rap and cinema, recently discovering the film “Inglourious Basterds”.
Weaknesses:
- Aggressive Language: He uses homophobic slurs and violent imagery, such as threatening to “shoot all you faggots” at the DGT.
- Impulsive Gambler: He laments closing a bet too early, admitting he “did not gamble well” on a football match.
- Reckless Driver: He jokes about “running over an old lady” during his first parking lesson.
- Misogynistic Tendencies: He makes derogatory comments about women, claiming they are “very bad” for calling each other pretty.
- Poor Professionalism: He openly posts about doing a “speedrun of losing my job”.
Your Simpsons character
Bart Simpson
Like Bart, @lilzxxxn is a rebellious youth from the suburbs who expresses constant frustration with authority, as seen when he tweets “puta DGT, putos examinadores, putos funcionarios y puta España os voy a fusilar a todos”. He shares Bart's love for street culture, rap, and chaos, whether he is bragging about his growing tattoo collection or joking about his poor driving skills, claiming he “akabo d atropellar marcha atras a una señora” during his first parking lesson. Despite his edgy persona and interest in “la farlopa”, he maintains a mischievous, prankster spirit similar to The Simpsons’ resident underachiever. Ultimately, his mix of sports fandom, urban music obsession, and disdain for the "capitalist invention" of Valentine's Day makes him a modern, Madrid-based version of El Barto.
Your MBTI personality Type
ESTP
lilzān𖤐! exhibits a strong Extroverted (E) and Sensing (S) preference, focusing heavily on immediate physical experiences like football matches, street fashion, and getting tattoos, often expressed through blunt, unfiltered reactions to his environment. His decision-making is clearly Thinking (T)-oriented rather than feeling, characterized by a harsh, confrontational style and a lack of concern for social niceties, seen when he tweets “puta DGT, putos examinadores, putos funcionarios y puta España os voy a fusilar a todos” after a driving test. The Perceiving (P) trait is evident in his spontaneous, chaotic lifestyle, involving gambling on sports, playing Gears of War 5, and his erratic approach to learning to drive, such as joking about “atropellar marcha atras a una señora” during his first lesson. Overall, he embodies the 'Entrepreneur' archetype: bold, action-oriented, and frequently seeking the next dopamine hit through music, tattoos, or “el 0.71 de las mñnas”.
Some pickup lines for you
- Are you a tattoo artist? Because I’ve got plenty of space on my back for more than just the Game of Thrones daggers.
- I’m no Pedro Sánchez, but I’d definitely grant you a scholarship if you promised to spend it all on us instead of just new ink.
- If we ever take a trip to Madrid Sur, I promise to be more respectful than the guys Frank Cuesta finds—I'll even help you clear the C3 line.
- I promise I’m a better bet than that parlay you closed early; stick with me and we’re guaranteed to take home the full 100.
- I might not be Gloosito or Cecilio G, but I’d still put you at the top of my Tier List every single year.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Madrid-based logistics professional and tattoo enthusiast. When I'm not navigating the C3 line or the driving range, I’m curating the ultimate Spanish rap playlist.– @lilzxxxn
Your signature cocktail
The South Madrid Speedrun
This cocktail is as aggressive and unrefined as a “café... in a bar with less health safety than in Angola”, capturing lilzān’s gritty Madrid Sur energy. The high-proof absinthe represents his chaotic drive toward a “speedrun of becoming jobless” and his obsession with 'real' rap figures like Gloosito and Cecilio G. We’ve added a spicy kick because he’s got “more stabs in my back than the Game of Thrones chair,” balanced by a dark fruitiness that mirrors his pessimistic sports takes like “I see this match very black.” It’s a drink for someone who uses their “scholarship money on tattoos” rather than playing it safe, served exclusively while wearing Timbo boots.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Lilzān exhibits a clear Slytherin combination of ambition, unfiltered self-preservation, and a disregard for established authority. He explicitly rejects traditional virtues of humility, stating, “aprovecho para disculparme pa disculparme absolutamente cn nadie lambebicho nosotros somo lo mejores”, and prioritizes personal gain, admitting he “me lo gastaré todo en tatuajes” after receiving a grant. His resourcefulness is often chaotic and self-centered, such as his aggressive stance toward the state and the “puta DGT” when they block his progress toward his goals. Ultimately, his focus on social status within his niche—judging others for being “toyakada” or “marikonazos”—reinforces a classic Slytherin 'us vs. them' mentality centered on personal identity and elitism.
Your movie
Your song
Middle Child - J. Cole
The user embodies a bridge between the street-style rap culture of the past and the commercial present, frequently critiquing artists like Glosito for going “0 comercial” while remaining deeply obsessed with the underground scene. Their lifestyle revolves around tattoos, drill music, and a cynical view of society, perfectly matching a track that balances street credibility with the pressures of modern life. They often reflect on their own growth, such as their rapid collection of “5 y bien hevys” tattoos or their chaotic journey toward getting a “carromato” (car). The song's themes of navigating between two worlds resonate with someone who mocks “marikonadas de café” but also celebrates personal academic success by tweeting “aprobé todo”. Ultimately, the user's focus on maintaining authenticity in a world of “toyakada” aligns with the song's lyrical emphasis on staying true to one's roots.
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