Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Emotionally expressive: Openly shares joy, fear and frustration, like celebrating finding an expensive bag at home in “viado eu tenho uma bolsa de 4 mil reais em casa e nem sabia pqp hoje é o melhor dia da minha vida” and stressing about exam results in “meu futuro literalmente depende de hoje se eu nao passar na ufam eu vou la pro raio que o parta”.
- Humorous: Uses jokes and absurdity, like calling lychee a shaved rambutan in “lichia parece um rabutan depilado” and imagining a mall photo captioned “liberdade ou solidão” in “fui o primeiro a chegar to sentado sozinho na praça de alimentação jaja vao tirar foto minha falando liberdade ou solidão”.
- Goal‑oriented: Focused on university entry and course options, constantly checking positions and strategies in “dia da posição no sisu maluca” and “pensando se coloco jornalismo em parintins ou letras em manaus na segunda opção do sisu”.
- Self‑aware: Recognizes personal strengths and weaknesses, such as grades in humanities vs sciences in “minha pior media em humanas/letras… e em naturezas/exatas foi 5” and questioning the lie that they liked math in “a maior mentira… foi que eu me entusiasmava com matemática”.
- Affectionate: Shows care for people and things, like loving their bag in “eu te amo bolsa da louis vitton que minha irmã me deu quando eu era criança” and expressing attachment to boyfriend and friends in “ser forçado a abandonar meu namorado, meus amigos e lembranças de manaus”.
Weaknesses:
- Harsh language: Frequently uses aggressive insults and curses, especially toward others, like the grader in “tomara que seja estraçalhado por um onibus esse gigolor do caralho”.
- Catastrophic thinking: Treats setbacks as end‑of‑the‑world scenarios, such as linking not passing UFAM to having to abandon everything in “meu futuro literalmente depende de hoje se eu nao passar na ufam eu vou la pro raio que o parta”.
- Morbid joking: Uses death and self‑harm as casual punchlines, like needing people to die to get a spot in “preciso que 12 pessoas do brasil morram ate dia 23” and “preciso que 12 pessoas morram ou desistam de jornalismo”.
- Anxiety‑driven: Shows intense worry and FOMO, like fearing Instagram will trigger self‑destructive thoughts in “se eu abrir o instagram agora acho que é papo de se matar” and stressing over Nintendo Switch FOMO in “to com a fomo do nintendo switch”.
- Volatile reactions: Reacts to results with extreme swings between hope and despair, from “vou desistir de tudo” in “vou desistir de tudo” to all‑caps rage at institutions in “VAI SE FUDER ESTACIO COMO CARALHOS VOCE TEM MEU NUMERO”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
Lisa Simpson fits best because this user is introspective, academically driven, and very emotionally intense about school and the future. They obsess over university admissions and performance, just like Lisa with her grades and future, in tweets like “sera que eu passo no sisu💔”, “minha pior media em humanas/letras em todo ensino medio foi 7,6 e em naturezas/exatas foi 5 imagine se eu tivesse preferidos”, and “meu futuro literalmente depende de hoje se eu nao passar na ufam eu vou la pro raio que o parta ser forçado a abandonar meu namorado, meus amigos e lembranças de manaus”. They show strong humanities/arts leanings and a desire to study journalism or letters, echoing Lisa’s intellectual, literature-loving side, as in “nao ironicamente os unicos cursos que eu passo direto na ufam é biblioteconomia, serviço social, ciencias sociais e antropologia” and “eu passaria em historia, ciencias sociais e LITERATURA”. At the same time, their dramatic humor, existential dread, and flair for melodrama—like “desista dos seus sonhos e morra” and “todos os dias parecem um eterno domingo”—mirror Lisa’s frequent bouts of teen angst and feeling misunderstood. Even their love of niche media and pop culture references, from Game of Thrones to Mitski and Adventure Time, as in “assistindo got pela primeira vez pqp aja incesto” and “a verdade é que eu teria tudo de hora de aventura”, fits Lisa’s artsy, slightly outsider vibe.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
They lean Extraverted: they frequently post about social outings and shared experiences, like going to a floating party spot and chatting about the Uber driver, e.g. “peguei um uber tao gente boa acho que hoje o dia vai ser bom, no more hate no more lies” and “indo pro flutuante ta tocando chappell roan aqui no carro”, and openly share emotional highs/lows with their followers. They appear Intuitive: they often move quickly from concrete facts to broader possibilities or dramatic hypotheticals, like turning college entrance numbers into big life narratives in “meu futuro literalmente depende de hoje se eu nao passar na ufam eu vou la pro raio que o parta ser forçado a abandonar meu namorado, meus amigos e lembranças de manaus”, and expressing big-picture wishes in “queria assistir todos os filmes do mundo”. Their style is Feeling over Thinking: reactions are emotionally charged and value‑driven rather than analytical, such as the explosive frustration in “viado eu to em lista de espera VSFD QUEM FOI O FILJA DE UMA PUTA QUE CORRIGIU A MINHA REDACAO…” and anxious, heart‑on‑sleeve posts like “sera que eu passo no sisu💔”. Finally, they seem more Perceiving than Judging: they juggle options and improvise rather than presenting firm plans, as in “pensando se coloco jornalismo em parintins ou letras em manaus na segunda opção do sisu” and “to pensando em entrar na lista de espera de letras no sisu que ta menor enquanto espero a segunda chamada do psc e do sis”, showing flexibility and last‑minute adaptation. Combined — expressive social energy, dramatic big‑picture thinking, emotional intensity, and spontaneous decision‑making — this profile fits ENFP best.
Some pickup lines for you
- If your ENEM essay was 820, I’m scared to know the score I’d get if they graded how hard I’m falling for the person who wrote “desista dos seus sonhos e morra” and still kept studying anyway.
- You worrying about 80 people for 9 journalism spots is cute, but statistically speaking the real miracle is me finding someone who loves Adventure Time, Stremio, and dramatic Twitter threads about UFAM as much as I already love you.
- Your grandma spreading fake news that you got into Letras at UFAM is wild, because I only need one confirmation: can I officially enroll as your boyfriend/girlfriend and stop living in this emotional waiting list?
- You found a 4k Louis Vuitton bag at home and called it the best day of your life, but imagine the day you find me next to you, carrying your R$7 water and your future college bag like it’s my most prized accessory.
- You saying every day feels like an eternal Sunday hit hard, but I have a proposal: we watch random movies on Stremio, complain about Sisu together, and I personally guarantee your Sundays start feeling a lot more like New Year’s Eve on the flutuante.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Future UFAM journalist (I hope). Once forgot I owned a 4k Louis Vuitton bag. Obsessed with films, Enem scores, and escaping overpriced water.– @loreipsum_69
Your signature cocktail
Hora de Aventura na UFAM Highball
This cocktail starts with cachaça infused with green grapes to honor how they romanticize small joys like fruit and little luxuries, as in “eu amo uva thompson” and that absurdly expensive water rant in “vsfd 7 reais uma agua isso nao existe”. Açaí syrup represents Manaus, Amazon vibes, and their constant tug-of-war with UFAM, from “as cartas falaram que eu vou ficar na ufam de manaus tomara” to the anxiety in “sera que eu passo no sisu💔”. Sparkling water with a pinch of sea salt captures the fluctuation between drama and resilience, like begging destiny in “please please please let me get what i want” while still going out to flutuante in “indo pro flutuante ta tocando chappell roan aqui no carro”. Lime juice brings brightness and academic sharpness, nodding to their strong humanities side in “minha pior media em humanas/letras em todo ensino medio foi 7,6” and their 820 score flex in “820 na redação”. Finally, a dash of chili tincture mirrors their chaotic, cursed-tweet humor and over-the-top curses at fate, especially the unhinged rage in “viado eu to em lista de espera VSFD QUEM FOI O FILJA DE UMA PUTA QUE CORRIGIU A MINHA REDACAO…” and the dark jokes in “preciso que 12 pessoas do brasil morram ate dia 23”. This is a strong but playful, slightly sweet, slightly salty, emotionally carbonated drink—perfect for someone whose life is half SISU results, half Hora de Aventura cosplay, as hinted in “percebi agora que meu outfit ta todo hora de aventura coded”.
Your Hogwarts House
Ravenclaw
This user shows a strong humanities/academia orientation and pride in their intellectual strengths, especially in language-related fields. They talk repeatedly about passing in or choosing courses like journalism, literature, and letters, and even mention that their lowest grades were much higher in humanities than in sciences, as in “minha pior media em humanas/letras em todo ensino medio foi 7,6 e em naturezas/exatas foi 5 imagine se eu tivesse preferidos”, which reflects a self-aware, analytical focus on academic performance. They are clearly motivated by study and university pathways, agonizing over Sisu choices and cutoffs in multiple tweets, like “pensando se coloco jornalismo em parintins ou letras em manaus na segunda opção do sisu” and “nao ironicamente os unicos cursos que eu passo direto na ufam é biblioteconomia, serviço social, ciencias sociais e antropologia”, which shows careful, rational weighing of options. There is also a clear love of media and stories—wanting to watch everything, as in “queria assistir todos os filmes do mundo”—and playful, slightly nerdy interests such as a Adventure Time tarot deck in “queria um taro de hora de aventura”. While they have emotional, dramatic outbursts about exam results, these are grounded in an underlying drive for intellectual achievement and a reflective, often witty way of talking about their situation, all of which align most closely with Ravenclaw’s love of learning, self-knowledge, and cerebral focus.
Your movie
Your song
Motion Sickness - Phoebe Bridgers
A song that best suits them is Motion Sickness by Phoebe Bridgers, because it mixes humor, bitterness, and vulnerability in a way that mirrors their timeline. They’re constantly swinging between hope and frustration about college and the future, like when they say their future depends on getting into UFAM and fear having to leave Manaus: “meu futuro literalmente depende de hoje se eu nao passar na ufam eu vou la pro raio que o parta ser forçado a abandonar meu namorado, meus amigos e lembranças de manaus”. They cope with that anxiety using dark, dramatic humor, as in “desista dos seus sonhos e morra” and the repeated jokes about needing people to die or give up spots in journalism: “preciso que 12 pessoas do brasil morram ate dia 23”. At the same time, there’s a very tender, almost romantic attachment to little things—bags, tarot, TV, and music—like “as cartas falaram que eu vou ficar na ufam de manaus tomara” and “eu te amo stremio”, which fits the song’s mix of affection and resentment. Their love of slightly melancholic, dramatic pop/indie aesthetics (Mitski excitement, complaining that every day feels like Sunday in “todos os dias parecem um eterno domingo”) is very in line with the emotional landscape of Motion Sickness. Overall, the song’s blend of wit, self-deprecation, and emotional chaos captures their online persona almost perfectly.
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