Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Theological Literacy: He demonstrates deep knowledge of High Church Anglicanism, citing specific theologians like “Hooker, Davenant, Laud” and liturgy.
- Nuanced Urbanism: He advocates for sophisticated infrastructure solutions, such as “electrified rail” and “urban cycling” education.
- Historical Contextualization: He applies historical precedents to modern politics, referencing “Whigs” and “Roman forefathers” to critique current events.
- Cultural Appreciation: He shows a refined taste for classical music and arts, calling “Jean Yves Thibaudet” an international treasure.
- Intellectual Consistency: He maintains a principled stance on trade and economics, criticizing the “uncertain nature” of tariff strategies regardless of party.
Weaknesses:
- Gatekeeping Tendencies: He frequently dismisses others' religious or political identities, labeling a peer a “pseudo Papist”.
- Abrasive Rhetoric: He uses harsh language to describe political subcultures, calling them a “freak show” and “insufferable”.
- Generational Bias: He displays open hostility toward older cohorts, framing policy debates as “generational warfare against younger people”.
- Elitist Outlook: He suggests “college admissions” should be tied to the ability to detect satire and docks “IQ points” from those with different interests.
- Cynical Defeatism: He occasionally posts low-effort, pessimistic content such as “It’s over” without providing constructive context.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
Like Lisa, Michael is an intellectually precocious and principled individual who often feels like an outsider within his own social or political circles. He demonstrates a deep commitment to high-minded aesthetics and history, such as his “Anglican preferences” for traditional liturgy and classical music. His tweets often critique his own side for lacking intellectual depth, lamenting that “so much of the American right is already a freak show”. Furthermore, he shares Lisa’s passion for civic improvement and urbanism, advocating for “teaching more kids to bike in school” and building better transit. This combination of a refined, “Baltic German age mindset” and a sense of moral duty to correct others' logic perfectly mirrors Lisa's character.
Your MBTI personality Type
INTJ
Michael exhibits strong Introversion and Intuition through his scholarly focus on “Conceptual History and Regulatory Policy” and his tendency to seek solitude, noted when he says he “will be less active on here for Lent... please do not contact”. His Thinking trait is evident in his logical, often biting critiques of policy, such as when he argues that “if your tariff/trade strategy is unstable and not built on solid foundations, it will fail every time”. Finally, his Judging preference is shown through his structured lists of preferences and historical rankings, like his “final prediction” maps and detailed breakdown of “How I'd vote in every Republican Primary/Convention from 1904 to 1960”.
Some pickup lines for you
- I promise I’m more than just 95% substantively aligned with you—I’m also much more insufferable in person than I am on the timeline.
- Are you a Virginia Amtrak route? Because I’d love to see us get electrified and skip that eternal transition period in D.C.
- I’d never call you a 'panican traitor,' but I do think it’s a 'humiliation' that we haven't shared a glass of Sam Smith’s winter ale together yet.
- Forget the 1662 or the 1928—the only 'Prayer Book' I need tonight is the one where we both agree that mulled wine is the superior Christmas drink.
- I may not have a Gallican ecclesiology, but I’m definitely part of the 'entitled cohort' that thinks you’re a national treasure.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Virginia-based analyst of policy and High Church Anglicanism. Known for critiquing 'trad' influencers while sipping a ginger julep and advocating for better trains.– @MichaelShinkar
Your signature cocktail
The High Church Highball
This cocktail reflects Michael’s refined 'Old High Church/Laudian' aesthetic, blending a sophisticated 19th-century spirit with a punchy “Ginger as a substitute” twist. The base of gin and cider nods to his “Anglican preferences” and love for “winter ale”, while the smoky tea garnish represents his fascination with “smoke filling the nave” at St. Mary the Virgin. Despite his high-brow interests in 'Conceptual History,' the drink is grounded in a practical 'Old Vermont' sensibility, avoiding the “insufferable” complexity of the online 'dissident right.' It is a drink for someone who “lieks trains” and values “law & order for the people.”
Your Hogwarts House
Ravenclaw
Michael's profile is defined by an academic and analytical lens, as evidenced by his bio focusing on Conceptual History and Regulatory Policy. He demonstrates the Ravenclaw trait of intellectual nuance by critiquing the American right for lacking “interesting ideas about urbanism or sprawl” and providing a highly specific list of preferred “Anglican preferences,” including 17th-century theologians and liturgical minutiae. His analytical nature is further revealed through his detailed critique of “tariff/trade strategy” and his observation that college admissions should test if one can “tell this is satire.” Ultimately, his feed prioritizes historical context and intellectual consistency over the raw populism or tribalism typical of other houses.
Your movie
Your song
A Hymn to Him - Alan Jay Lerner & Frederick Loewe
Michael's profile reflects a distinctively traditionalist and Old World sensibility, deeply rooted in high-church Anglicanism and classical aesthetics. His preference for the “1928 (USA) or 1662” Book of Common Prayer and his self-identification as “Old High Church/Laudian” suggest a person who values structure, ritual, and history. This song, characterized by its witty, erudite, and somewhat elitist perspective, matches his tendency to critique modern 'slop' and his disdain for the “freak show” of current political subcultures. Much like the character of Henry Higgins, Michael displays a refined, almost anachronistic intellectualism, whether he is praising “Charles Villiers Stanford’s Magnificat in G Major” or advocating for “urban cycling” and traditional town planning.
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