Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Witty observer: Uses sharp, funny commentary about culture and people-watching, like British accents and UK slang in “next time i’m alone with a british person i’m going to say ‘it’s okay. it’s just us. you don’t have to do the voice anymore.’” and “british people throw nonce around too freely.”
- Musically literate: Shows deep music knowledge across genres and eras, from Leonard Cohen and Joy Division to UK garage, Cocteau Twins, and obscure britpop, as in “i wouldn’t call him a christlike figure per se but i would say that leonard cohen occupies a role in my life that jesus christ seems to occupy for many others” and “not enough love for britpop khias on britpoptwt.”
- Politically engaged: Expresses clear leftist politics and actively participates, like critiquing Trump’s Haiti policy in “trump has always spoken of the haitian people derogatorily…” and describing writing counter-letters to MPs in “spite has been becoming a huge motivator in my political action lately…”
- Self-aware humor: Openly makes herself the joke in a reflective way, e.g. “cut my bangs way too short and girls i cross paths with keep complimenting my bangs… because they can tell i need to hear that right now” and “assigned annoying by spotify 💔”
- Empathetic values: Shows concern for dignity and others’ experiences, criticizing slurs in “i rlly detest the r word… i think it’s a profoundly ugly word that makes the speaker sound vulgar and ignorant.” and expressing pride and hurt about Haiti in “i have such pride in being haitian… & it's been so upsetting to me to see this degradation either widely accepted or shrugged off.”
Weaknesses:
- Cynical tone: Frequent focus on irritation and contempt, e.g. “i have no interest in talking to anyone who still has strong opinions on that season of love island in january” and describing Kozelek as a “negative presence” in “listening to the work of mark kozelek always feels to me like having a significantly older boyfriend that’s a negative presence in my life”
- Spite-driven: Explicitly frames political action around spite in “spite has been becoming a huge motivator in my political action lately… i write counter letters to discourage ministers from listening to them.”, which risks reacting against others rather than toward clear goals.
- Emotional volatility: Tweets oscillate between humor and intense emotion—missing someone and drinking in “wasn’t gonna drink tonight but i miss him like a motherfucker” and struggling with TikTok trends in “only skin by joanna newsom is trending on tiktok. im trying to get to a place emotionally where that sort of thing does not bother me at all.”
- Self-deprecating: Leans heavily on putting herself down, like “i am made an observably less happy and pleasant person in my daily public transit use” and “when i picture myself navigating the world from a third person pov it closely resembles stavros halkias”, which may reinforce a negative self-image.
- Conflict-prone: Frequently references drama and antagonism—Oasis Twitter feuds in “apparently things are happening on oasistwt but i have a job and am in school so”, calling someone “gay hitler” in “i will not take this kind of talk from gay hitler!!!”, and describing a dream with animosity toward Matty Healy in “matty healy was in my dream last night and there was an animosity between us”
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
This user most closely matches Lisa Simpson: hyper-verbal, politically engaged, and deeply attached to art and music while still being a bit of a hater in a principled way. They’re clearly intellectually and politically oriented, e.g. writing about Trump’s prejudice toward Haitians and TPS in tweets like “trump has always spoken of the haitian people derogatorily…”, and openly critiquing slurs in “i rlly detest the r word… i think it’s a profoundly ugly word that makes the speaker sound vulgar and ignorant.” That moral seriousness sits alongside a deep, slightly obsessive love of culture and music—Leonard Cohen as quasi-religious figure in “i wouldn’t call him a christlike figure per se but i would say that leonard cohen occupies a role in my life that jesus christ seems to occupy for many others” is extremely Lisa-coded. Like Lisa, they’re self-aware and a bit world-weary, as in “irony really is the shackles of youth” and “i am made an observably less happy and pleasant person in my daily public transit use”, but they still care enough to act, even out of spite, as in “spite has been becoming a huge motivator in my political action lately…”. The mix of bookishness, music-nerd tendencies, leftist politics, and sardonic but earnest moral sense fits Lisa far better than any of the other core Simpson family members.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
They lean Extraverted: they frequently talk about going out, being drunk, and loving their online circle, e.g. “so drunk god i love my oomfs”, and they openly narrate social mishaps like “wiped out on ice as i was getting on the bus in a manner so devastating that 3 people on the bus asked if i was okay”, which suggests comfort with public attention and shared experiences. They appear Intuitive: their feed is packed with abstract, associative takes—like comparing political labels (“i think the dirtbag left was a more charming moniker for the phenomenon than dark woke”) or describing listening to Mark Kozelek as “like having a significantly older boyfriend that’s a negative presence in my life”—rather than concrete, sensory detail. Their stance is clearly Feeling-driven: they foreground ethical and emotional reactions, e.g. rejecting slurs in “i rlly detest the r word… i think it’s a profoundly ugly word that makes the speaker sound vulgar and ignorant” and tying politics to personal identity in “i have such pride in being haitian… it’s been so upsetting to me to see this degradation either widely accepted or shrugged off”. Finally, they read as Perceiving: they present themselves as spontaneous and reactive—getting unexpectedly drunk, impulsively changing plans, or joking about being assigned traits by Spotify in “assigned annoying by spotify 💔”—and they embrace open-ended discourse and shifting interests rather than structured, planned routines. Overall, their playful, emotionally expressive, politically engaged, and idea-jumping style aligns best with ENFP.
Some pickup lines for you
- If Only Skin is trending on TikTok, I volunteer to help you cope by listening to the whole Joanna Newsom discography with you and pretending we’re better than everyone about it together.
- You cheering for the Seahawks just because you fw Frasier convinces me we’d thrive in a relationship based entirely on obscure, slightly unhinged cultural justifications.
- You said Leonard Cohen occupies the role in your life that Jesus does for others—can I at least be, like, the vaguely problematic saint you light a candle for when you miss him ‘like a motherfucker’?
- As a fellow Canada enjoyer, I promise if three Canadian bands tour North America with one Canadian date, I’ll take you to it—Ottawa romance arc, Carleton Advantage, canadassance and all.
- You cutting your bangs too short and girls hyping you up out of sheer spiritual duty… I’d like to apply to be your full‑time ‘they actually look incredible’ specialist, with benefits that include listening to Happy Mondays and arguing about Britpop khias.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
20 • she/her • Canadian, Haitian, & chronically on the bus. Writes about britpop, politics, and public transit-induced character development.– @MISERABLEN0W
Your signature cocktail
The Canadassance Hangover
This cocktail starts with Canadian rye whisky for the proudly Canada-down, musictwt girlie who tweets “so affirming to be canadian on here during the canadassance” and “yall know i’m canada down”. A bitter hit of Aperol/Campari reflects her sharp political takes and disdain for reactionary media, like “i subscribed to emails from The Free Press... i’ve been trying to unsubscribe ever since” and “spite has been becoming a huge motivator in my political action lately”. Sour cherry liqueur captures her romantic melancholia and music-fuelled yearning in posts like “wasn’t gonna drink tonight but i miss him like a motherfucker” and “only skin by joanna newsom is trending on tiktok. im trying to get to a place emotionally where that sort of thing does not bother me at all.”. The dry prosecco topper represents her fizzy, funny, outwardly sociable energy when she’s “so drunk god i love my oomfs” or declaring a song “cunty as hell idgaf” with a Spotify link to soundtrack the night (link tweet). Finally, a dash of saline nods to the humility and minor disasters of daily life—like “wiped out on ice as i was getting on the bus... every day’s a lesson in humility.”—a little salt that makes all the sweetness, bitterness, and chaos make sense together.
Your Hogwarts House
Ravenclaw
Gabby reads as a classic Ravenclaw: sharply observant, analytical, and very invested in language, media, and ideas. She explicitly frames herself as someone who thinks about words and discourse, e.g. reflecting on the slur discourse in “i rlly detest the r word… i think it’s a profoundly ugly word that makes the speaker sound vulgar and ignorant.” and joking that listening to Happy Mondays makes her feel like a “linguistic anthropologist” in “ryder’s pronunciation captivates me.”. There’s clear intellectual curiosity and love of learning: she’s writing letters to MPs out of spite but also political engagement in “spite has been becoming a huge motivator in my political action lately…”, and casually drops film/lit references like La Haine in “thank u kassovitz 🙏🙏”. Her humour is very cerebral and referential, like imagining social experiments on Brits in “next time i’m alone with a british person i’m going to say ‘it’s okay. it’s just us. you don’t have to do the voice anymore.’” and breaking down song narratives critically in “imagine dating ben folds as a teenaged girl… and then he drops a song calling you a brick…”. While she clearly has strong values and loyalties (to Haiti, to Canadian identity, to certain artists), the dominant throughline is sharp, witty analysis and meta-commentary on culture and language, which fits Ravenclaw more than any other house.
Your movie
Your song
Everything Is Embarrassing - Sky Ferreira
Sky Ferreira’s Everything Is Embarrassing fits them best because they explicitly connect with it, saying “sky ferreira’s everything is embarrassing is so genius like that’s exactly how it feels”, which shows the song’s emotional tone mirrors their inner life. The track’s blend of romantic frustration and self-consciousness aligns with tweets like “wasn’t gonna drink tonight but i miss him like a motherfucker” and “i miss him”, where longing and regret coexist. Its cool, slightly detached pop sheen also matches their musictwt identity and taste for indie and alt-pop, seen in posts about Leonard Cohen, Joy Division, Lana Del Rey, and Britpop. The title itself, Everything Is Embarrassing, captures their self-aware, wry humiliation-at-life vibe, like when they say “wiped out on ice as i was getting on the bus… every day’s a lesson in humility.” and “assigned annoying by spotify 💔”. Overall, the song’s mix of melodrama, irony, and genuine feeling reflects their timeline more closely than any single artist-obsession track would.
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