
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
The user's pattern of chronic negativity, self‑described mental illness, reliance on cigarettes and a job, and repeated expressions of hopelessness and misogyny align closely with Moe Szyslak, the perpetually bitter bartender of Springfield. Moe is often shown as a lonely, depressed alcoholic who expresses cynical views about women, as in the tweet "Women genuinely just need to shut the fuck up". The user’s admission "I have my hobbies, my job and cigarettes and life is good" mirrors Moe’s life centered around his bar, cigarettes, and drinking. Their suicidal language "ONE DAY UNTIL MY SUICIDE" echoes Moe’s many suicide attempts in the series. The combination of self‑deprecation "Please don’t follow me im mentally ill and retarded" and embittered worldview makes Moe the best fit.

Your MBTI personality Type
The user’s language is highly self‑focused and reflective, indicating introversion (e.g., “I’m so mentally ill that I cannot listen to music about love” and “I have my hobbies, my job and cigarettes and life is good”). Their statements are abstract and theoretical, such as “Learning about blackpill is finally leaving the cave… society is nothing but smokes and mirrors” and the generational prediction about women’s choices, showing a preference for intuition. The tone is logical and detached, using categorical judgments like “Women genuinely just need to shut the fuck up” and “If women were completely free to choose partners we would become a species of 6'4 psychopathic 70iq retards,” which aligns with Thinking. Finally, the user displays a structured, decisive outlook, planning actions and holding firm beliefs (e.g., “ONE DAY UNTIL MY SUICIDE” and the consistent incel ideology), reflecting a Judging preference.

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Your new Twitter bio
Coder, indie gamer, mulled wine & Monster fan. Once tried debugging after both—survived. Sharing tech musings and memes. #PolandBros– @MonkeHitlerite

Your signature cocktail
The drink mirrors the user’s bleak, self‑destructive vibe, mixing bitter Campari and smoked rye to echo their constant anger and resignation, as seen in tweets like "Women would rather help literal rapists and gang members escape justice than date an incel lol" and "ONE DAY UNTIL MY SUICIDE 🥳🥳🤩🤩". The splash of absinthe hints at the delusional MK‑ULTRA conspiracies they claim, quoting "I'M AN MK ULTRA VICTIM THERE'S POISON IN MY SYSTEM". The energy‑drink boost reflects their reliance on stimulants, referenced when they mention drinking "a white monster". Finally, the blackcurrant liqueur gives the cocktail a dark, "blackpill" hue, tying to their statement "Learning about blackpill is finally leaving the cave".

Your Hogwarts House
The user displays many Slytherin traits such as a self‑serving, cunning outlook and a belief in personal superiority. For example, they write, "Women genuinely just need to shut the fuck up" showing a disdain for others and a willingness to assert dominance. They also express a strategic avoidance of relationships, saying, "Whenever i think i need a girl ... I would inevitably become an oofy doofy simp ... Life gets better," which reflects a calculated self‑preservation typical of Slytherins. Their elitist view that "if women were completely free to choose their partners we would become a species of 6'4 psychopathic 70iq retards" demonstrates a belief in their own superiority and a desire to control outcomes. Combined with frequent references to blackpill ideology and personal ambition to rise above perceived societal constraints, Slytherin best fits their profile.

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The account repeatedly expresses deep despair and suicidal thoughts, as shown by the tweet "ONE DAY UNTIL MY SUICIDE 🥳🥳🤩🤩" and "I’m so mentally ill that I cannot listen to music about love". These sentiments match the lyric "I hurt myself today, to see if I still feel" from the song, which captures self‑harm and numbness. Their bitter, nihilistic view of humanity and women—e.g., "Women would rather help literal rapists and gang members escape justice than date an incel lol"—aligns with the song’s bleak reflection on personal failure and emptiness. The recurring self‑loathing in tweets like "I don’t actually hate foids I’m just extremely bitter about my predicament" and "Please don’t follow me I’m mentally ill and retarded" further reinforces the fit, as "Hurt" is a raw confession of regret and inner ruin.

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MonkeHitlerite
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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