
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
They read as a hyper-online, self-aware, emotionally intense teen who overthinks everything, which aligns most with Lisa Simpson. Like Lisa, they mix dark self-reflection with intelligence and niche interests, saying things like “having an ed feels like beating a dead horse everyday but the horse lowkey has a mean right hook and beats u back” and “i am the way i am because everything i love i leave unfinished”, showing insight and self-critique. Their political/ethical awareness and explicit stance on race — “yes i’m white, yes i support black lives matter, no i don’t say nigga, we exist.” — mirrors Lisa’s strong moral compass and willingness to be outspoken. At the same time, they have Lisa’s mix of loneliness and superiority/insecurity, joking “i have nothing going for me” while also making sharp, elaborate jokes like “bmi high grades low wallet thick call that FATSPO 🧐”. Even their media obsessions (anime, Yellowjackets, niche games) and tendency to spiral intellectually about them echo Lisa’s pattern of intense fixations and using media/ideas as an emotional outlet.

Your MBTI personality Type
They lean Extraverted: they constantly interact with mutuals, make sexual and edgy jokes, and openly narrate their life (e.g., social drama, parties, and inside jokes) instead of keeping things private, like in “inside joke with my friends about a ‘sailor moon double sided strap’ little do they know it’s from a gojo pegging fic on tumblr” and “oomfs fighting on the tl omg”. They appear Intuitive: they often speak in metaphors and big-picture comparisons rather than concrete step-by-step thinking, such as “having an ed feels like beating a dead horse everyday but the horse lowkey has a mean right hook and beats u back” and conceptual takes like “steven universe and the owl house really cursed children’s tv because now every show wants to be ‘secretly deep’”. Their tone is strongly Feeling-oriented: they show high emotional reactivity, care about social justice and friends’ feelings, and frame things in terms of hurt or affection rather than cold logic, as in “yes i’m white, yes i support black lives matter, no i don’t say nigga, we exist.” and “oomfs watching me threaten to make out with other oomfs on the tl after i talked them off them ledge”. Finally, they read as Perceiving: they are chaotic, impulsive, and constantly changing plans—setting goals but not rigidly following them, joking about unfinished things and spontaneous binges/purges, as seen in “i am the way i am because everything i love i leave unfinished” and the loose, hopeful-but-not-structured plan in “goals for feb: go at least 3+ days without b/p lose to 48kg”. This combination of loud online presence, metaphor-heavy and fandom-driven thinking, emotional intensity, and disorganized spontaneity fits ENFP best.

Some pickup lines for you

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Your new Twitter bio
Film-obsessed student, ex-ballet kid, part-time fandom analyst. Once turned a hotdog mishap into an argument for vegetarianism. Opinions my own.– @nanaszns

Your signature cocktail
The Espresso shot matches their hyper, doomscrolling energy and late-night chaos, like when they’re “JUST WANT TO PACE WHY IS EBERHONE AWAKE HOLY FUCK”. Blood orange soda brings a sweet–acidic chaos that fits edtwt drama and their own self-awareness, as they joke about b/p sessions and consequences in posts like “2 days until my b/p sesh i’m so essited” and “finding out i can purge food from up to 3 hours ago might be top 10 most detrimental to my health information”. Blackcurrant liqueur is dark, fruity, and a bit goth, nodding to the mix of ed humor and recovery thoughts in “i kinda wanna recover tho” and their ‘sociopath and wife’ vibes in “the category is sociopath and wife who loves it over there”. A Sea salt rim represents the sting and rawness of their honesty about purging and sore throats, like “my throat feels raw” and “eating orange with post vomit sore throat newest member of #shedtwt”. Finally, edible glitter captures their fandom brainrot and dramatic flair, from “voices telling me to change layout the yellowjackets brain rot 🤤🤤…” to horny media takes like “i might start hanibal mads mikelson gets me painfully wet”, making the drink look as extra as their timeline feels.

Your Hogwarts House
They consistently show Slytherin-style resourcefulness and self-preservation in the way they manage their disorder, like stealing low-cal sweeteners to keep restricting while out in public: “i be stealing the stevia packets from the coffee makers in shops u rly gotta catch meee 👀👀👀👀” and calculating extreme deficits: “wait if i just eat 1400 cals and get 30k steps which burns almost 900 cals im still in a mega deficit 😳”. There’s also a blunt, strategic attitude toward relationships and image, like planning to change how they treat people after weight loss: “switching up on my day ones when i lose this weight sorry” and joking about needing more of a specific demographic for their circle: “i need more blkedtwt moots bro follow me black people”, which suggests a calculated, selective social approach. Their humor is sharp and often darkly tactical (e.g. using up the milk to shut down a binge: “drank all the milk while i binged so i couldn’t binge on cereal anymore”), which leans more toward Slytherin cunning than Hufflepuff warmth. While they do show wit and creativity (Ravenclaw traits) in lines like “king von w bulimia call that king VOM 🤮 😭✌🏾”, those serve a larger pattern of survival-driven, opportunistic thinking about their body, relationships, and online presence. Taken together, the emphasis on maximizing advantage, controlling outcomes, and using dark humor as armor fits Slytherin more strongly than any other house.

Your movie

Your song
A fitting song for them is “Bury A Friend” by Billie Eilish, because it captures the mix of dark humor, self‑destructive behavior, and detachment that runs through their timeline. They routinely joke about their own harm and disorders, like when they say “having an ed feels like beating a dead horse everyday but the horse lowkey has a mean right hook and beats u back” and “when the function includes planned binge followed by guilt and self harm:”, which echoes the song’s themes of being haunted by your own mind. The track’s unsettling, almost playful menace fits with posts such as “if i pass any disorder onto my children you’ll be hearing about a new rope tying method named after me” and “learning to purge is the worst thing i’ve ever done all i want is to binge all day”. At the same time, their flashes of wanting to get better, like “i kinda wanna recover tho” and “forced recov era coming”, mirror the song’s push‑pull between giving in to the monster and wanting it to stop. The eerie, confessional tone of Bury A Friend encapsulates how they turn very real pain into stylized, morbid commentary.

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