Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Expressive: Openly shares emotions about crying, partying, love, and frustration, e.g. “crying all day” and “all i wanna do is listen to music and dance”.
- Humorous: Uses self-deprecating and situational humor, like “yes i’m an addict… but at the end of the day my ass is still fat so it’s okay” and the vibrator/Wendy’s story “maybe she does love me”.
- Music‑passionate: Shows deep enthusiasm for artists and tracks, e.g. “no matter how much music i listen to bladee will always be my fave” and “drain gang is everything to me”.
- Community‑oriented: Enjoys feeling included and connected, like “i love it when men dap me up i feel so included” and posting about turning up crowds “i turn up any function i turn up any crowd!”.
- Self‑aware: Recognizes personal patterns, e.g. “yes i’m an addict, yes i’m an avoidant attachment, yes i can’t stop playing league of legends” and talking about therapy and medication “potentially getting medicated today pray for me”.
Weaknesses:
- Self‑destructive: Frequently glorifies heavy substance use, e.g. “hit the plug for the drugs ain’t tryna live a long life” and “i can’t wait to lay in bed and get so high i can’t move”.
- Emotional‑instability: Describes extreme feelings and BPD identity, like “me im his bpd girlfriend”, “crying all day”, and references to psych ward advice “my therapist told me i should check myself into the psych ward lol”.
- Therapy‑avoidant: Openly ghosts and dismisses therapy, e.g. “my therapist is so useless ghosted her for like 6 months… im never seeing her again lol”.
- Volatile‑attachments: Acknowledges avoidant attachment and threatening disappearance, e.g. “yes i’m an avoidant attachment” and “if u try to help/stop me ill either just disappear on u or yell at u”.
- Risky‑sexuality: Frequently posts explicit sexual content and innuendo, e.g. “my 🐱taste like rice”, “i can’t play with my pussy one time??”, and “lol i need that foot long i’m ngl”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
The best match is Lisa Simpson, but if she’d grown up extremely online, overstimulated, and deep in music/scene culture. Like Lisa, she’s self-aware, emotionally intense, and often struggling with her mental health, as seen when she says “today my therapist told me i should check myself into the psych ward lol” and calls herself out with “yes i’m an addict, yes i’m an avoidant attachment… but at the end of the day my ass is still fat so it’s okay”. Lisa’s whole thing is feeling too much and being a bit alienated from her environment, which fits tweets like “i fucking hate living in the middle of nowhere canada… maybe one day ill get to see the rest of my fave artists” and “this is where i’ve been at for so long now, and the guilt jsut gets worse and worse with everyday”. The user’s obsessive love for niche music and specific artists (“drain gang is everything to me”, “no matter how much music i listen to bladee will always be my fave”) mirrors Lisa’s intense passions (jazz, causes, books). Finally, the mix of horny, chaotic humor with genuine vulnerability (“i can’t play with my pussy one time??”, “i think abt this all the time a big sister would have saved me”) feels like an edgier, grown-up Lisa who never stopped feeling too much and turned it into highly online performance instead of sax solos.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
They lean Extrovert: they constantly talk about parties, functions, and crowds, e.g. “party in natalie city” and “i turn up any function i turn up any crowd!”, and openly seek social feedback like “i finished my shift! any praise or something … ?”. Their interests and language are highly Intuitive, centered on vibes, fantasy, and imaginative aesthetics rather than concrete facts, such as “this is what my world looks like” and “walking on icee blood moon tonight who’s gonna die…”. They are clearly Feeling-oriented, making emotionally charged, value-based judgments about music, people, and generations (“this new generation is like that, they just latch onto stuff they have no clue about”; “i fucking hate living in the middle of nowhere canada”), and openly expressing vulnerability about mental health and attachment (“yes i’m an addict, yes i’m an avoidant attachment…”). Their lifestyle reads as spontaneous and flexible, fitting Perceiving: they emphasize drugs, impulsive choices, and lack of structure, such as “gonna eat too many edibles n rub my shit crazy style see u guys later” and “hit the plug for the drugs ain’t tryna live a long life”, and they describe chaotic gaming/therapy habits rather than organized planning (“my therapist is so useless… ghosted her for like 6 months”). Overall, the energetic social presence, emotional intensity, imaginative aesthetic focus, and free-form lifestyle align most strongly with ENFP.
Some pickup lines for you
- You said “yes I’m an addict… yes i can’t stop playing league of legends. but at the end of the day my ass is still fat so it’s okay” — if we duo queue, can I be the support who keeps you alive while you hard-carry and look good doing it?
- You’re out here hating on nine victims listeners and threatening to disown anyone playing blackwinterwells, but still worshipping Bladee, Drain Gang, and Kurtains… I’m just trying to figure out what playlist I need to make to qualify as ‘boyfriend’ and not ‘lose my number.’
- You said your therapist told you to check into the psych ward and another one ghosted you — clearly professionals can’t handle you, so can I apply to be your emotionally available, weed-sharing, rotisserie-chicken-eating unpaid intern instead?
- You’re 23, Filipino, living in the middle of nowhere Canada, high off edibles, listening to Bladee, trying to get thick, and grinding League/TFT… statistically speaking, the only thing missing from that build is a delusional guy who thinks you’re the main character of every Protect and Kurtains song. I volunteer.
- You finished your shift asking for ‘any praise or something…?’ — here’s a deal: you keep turning up every function and every crowd, I’ll keep clapping like you just got Diamond border, free Subway footlong, and ninajirachi guest list all in one night.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
23 • she/her • Canadian in the middle of nowhere, surviving off Bladee, League queues & rotisserie chicken. Therapist said psych ward, I said queue dodge.– @natalieecity
Your signature cocktail
Party in Natalie City (Love Pill Highball)
The Party in Natalie City (Love Pill Highball) is a strong, glittery, slightly dangerous drink for the girl who’s “drinking henny like it’s waterr” (“drinking henny like it’s waterr”) and still turning up every function: “i turn up any function i turn up any crowd!” (“i turn up any function i turn up any crowd!”). Hennessy is the base because she’s loud about it and unashamed, while the sweet lychee liqueur is her soft, romantic love pill core, the girl who “genuinely lay in my bed and pretend kurtains is singing about me” (“i genuinely lay in my bed and pretend kurtains is singing about me”). Sour apple liqueur adds that sharp, bratty bite that says “lose my number if ur listening to that blackwinterwells song” (“lose my number if ur listening to that blackwinterwells song”) and “no one’s listening to ur album whatsapp ricky” (“no one’s listening to ur album whatsapp ricky”). Sparkling yuzu soda keeps it bright, fizzy, and hyper, like “all i wanna do is listen to music and dance” (“all i wanna do is listen to music and dance”) and her League/TFT grind arcs. The edible glitter and popping candy rim are for the chaotic, horny, oversharing timeline princess whose life is “the way i live my life is crazy” (“the way i live my life is crazy”) and who proudly declares “yes i’m an addict, yes i’m an avoidant attachment, yes i can’t stop playing league of legends. but at the end of the day my ass is still fat so it’s okay” (“yes i’m an addict, yes i’m an avoidant attachment, yes i can’t stop playing league of legends. but at the end of the day my ass is still fat so it’s okay”).
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Their tweets emphasize self-preservation, ego, and a sharp, sometimes cutting stance toward others that fits Slytherin more than any other house. They openly embrace being "crazy" and difficult to handle, saying others must accept it or be pushed away: “or u just have to be okay with me being crazy cus if u try to help/stop me ill either just disappear on u or yell at u”, which shows a self-protective, defensive posture and willingness to manipulate distance. There is clear ambition and pride in image and status: “yes i’m an addict, yes i’m an avoidant attachment, yes i can’t stop playing league of legends. but at the end of the day my ass is still fat so it’s okay” and “i wanna get hot for the summer i do my cardioo” both highlight a ruthless focus on personal appeal as compensatory power. They also frame relationships in transactional or power-tinged ways, like “how r women losers when men r the ones paying” and joking about people funding her life: “wait this is lit u guys should pay for my life too”, which suggests a strategic, opportunistic mindset. Even their love of turning up and dominating spaces—“i turn up any function i turn up any crowd!” and “i promise u do not wanna get in our way”—reads as wanting to command the room rather than blend in. Altogether, the mix of image-consciousness, emotional volatility weaponized for self-preservation, and an unapologetically opportunistic edge points most strongly to Slytherin.
Your movie
Your song
Porcelain - Bladee
A well-fitting song for them is Porcelain by Bladee, because their whole vibe and interests are deeply tied to Drain Gang and emotional, druggy cloud-rap aesthetics. They explicitly say “no matter how much music i listen to bladee will always be my fave” and “drain gang is everything to me” in “drain gang is everything to me”, so it makes sense to choose a Bladee track rather than something more generic. Lyrically, Porcelain is about fragility, self-destruction, and numbing yourself, which lines up with tweets like “hit the plug for the drugs ain’t tryna live a long life” and “today my therapist told me i should check myself into the psych ward lol”. There’s also a mix of playful horniness and self-awareness in their posts, like “yes i’m an addict, yes i’m an avoidant attachment, yes i can’t stop playing league of legends. but at the end of the day my ass is still fat so it’s okay”, which fits Bladee’s blend of melancholy and flexing. Overall, Porcelain captures their combination of emotional volatility, internet-poisoned humor, and devotion to the Drain aesthetic better than a more mainstream song would.
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