NicholasAnchovy
City:
Job:
In a relationship:
Best friend:
Politically:
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Resourceful Problem Solver: He takes a hands-on approach to maintenance, repairing his car's rear camera and bumper himself and advocating for using YouTube to handle home renovations instead of hiring contractors.
- Frugal Living: He is financially conscious, sourcing clothes from thrift stores and staying with his parents to build wealth, describing himself as "filthy rich" because of his savings.
- Dedicated Hobbyist: He shows long-term commitment to his interests, such as spending two and a half years building a classic clothing collection and teaching himself complex driving maneuvers like rev-matching.
- Creative Engagement: He enjoys digital arts and social gaming, frequently sharing sketches he has made of his online friends and collaborating on creative projects in Minecraft.
- Self-Awareness: He is capable of recognizing his own emotional responses, admitting that a children's movie was "really cute" and that he cried during the ending.
Weaknesses:
- Bigoted Rhetoric: He frequently uses derogatory slurs and xenophobic language, such as insulting religious groups and using racial and antisemitic tropes to describe platform features.
- Combative Online Presence: He admits to "toying with somebody" and blocking them specifically to cause a "cortisol spike," demonstrating a desire for malicious social interaction.
- Gender-Based Hostility: He uses transphobic language to dismiss the achievements of others and expresses objectifying views toward women in both gaming and real-life contexts.
- Resistance to Learning: He displays a fixed mindset regarding personal growth, explicitly stating he is not going to study anatomy or take formal steps to improve his art skills.
- Socially Abrasive Humor: His sense of humor is often aggressive or offensive, as seen in his bio's graphic imagery and his tendency to mock others' appearances and life choices.
Your Simpsons character
Comic Book Guy
This user mirrors the elitist, anti-social, and hobby-obsessed nature of Jeff Albertson, better known as Comic Book Guy. Much like the character's disdain for 'lesser' fans, this user mocks others' intelligence and appearances, such as calling someone a “short bald coper” or criticizing a “chud” for checking out of society. He shares the character’s hyper-fixation on niche interests like “classic men's clothing” and his “niche modded portable gaming console obsession,” often displaying a cynical, superior attitude. Ultimately, his combination of video game mastery, such as reaching “Grandmaster Baiter rank”, and his aggressive online gatekeeping makes him a perfect fit for the Springfield curmudgeon.
Your MBTI personality Type
ISTP
NicholasAnchovy displays ISTP traits through a strong focus on technical troubleshooting and hands-on mechanics, seen when he describes how "After 2 grueling hours I finished installing my rear camera on my opel corsa d". He exhibits a blunt, logical Thinking (T) preference, often dismissing emotional nuance in favor of harsh realism, such as when he mocks others for being a "short bald coper". His Sensing (S) and Perceiving (P) traits manifest in his practical, shortcut-oriented approach to tasks, like deciding "I'll just let them hang in there" regarding dashcam wires rather than taking apart his dashboard. Despite his abrasive online presence, he primarily engages in solitary hobbies like car maintenance and gaming, consistent with an Introverted (I) profile.
Some pickup lines for you
- Are you an Opel Corsa D? Because I’ve been looking for you for 5 months and I’m ready to commit to a lifetime of DIY repairs.
- I promise I’m more reliable than an Aliexpress CarPlay—I won't mess with your battery, but I’ll definitely give you a cortisol spike.
- Is your name Judge? Because I’ve been shipping us since I saw your Prescott posts and I think we’re the ultimate Hermit achievement.
- I’d never block you just to see the 'could not send' prompt, because my attache case is already full of all the reasons you're a 10/10.
- You must be a perfect revmatch, because meeting you is an absolutely orgasmic experience.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
A classic menswear enthusiast navigating life in Hamburg. Whether I'm mastering the Autobahn in my 2007 Opel Corsa or sketching, I’m always keeping it stylish.– @NicholasAnchovy
Your signature cocktail
The Ricer's Rev-Match
This strong, bitter drink reflects a man who claims “Classic men's clothing is not a simple choice, it's a lifestyle” while simultaneously driving a 2007 Opel Corsa with “stylish hubcaps for my steelie wheelies”. The Jägermeister honors his German roots and his dream of being “filthy rich if the german government didn't leech off my paycheck”. The cortisol syrup represents his tactical social media use, noting that “blocking them is a great way to get a cortisol spike out of them”. Finally, the sweet blueberry hint is for the surprising soft side of a guy who “cried” over Wreck-It Ralph 2.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
NicholasAnchovy displays the classic Slytherin traits of resourcefulness and self-interest, particularly in his financial and social maneuvering. He takes pride in his growing wealth by "still living with my parents" and views social interactions as a game to be won, noting that "blocking them is a great way to get a cortisol spike out of them". His ambition is focused on personal gain and status, such as his desire to be "filthy rich" and his cynical view of others as "cucks" or "safe options". Ultimately, his focus on hierarchy and his willingness to use psychological tactics for a "win" align him firmly with Slytherin.
Your movie
Your song
Politically Uncorrect - Tom MacDonald
Evilson's digital footprint aligns with the provocative and anti-establishment themes of Tom MacDonald, whom he specifically references when playing “Tom MacDonalds' 'Pray for the left'” to replace movie credits. His tweets frequently mock progressive culture, such as calling Reddit “too left wing for me” and using slurs to dismiss others as “cucks who want socialism.” He displays a cynical pride in his offensive humor, exemplified by his bio where he claims to be “shaving heads off newborn babys” and his tendency to post “scheiß auf den Islam” to intentionally stir conflict. This fusion of edgy internet culture, right-wing grievances, and a self-described “impotent rage” makes this track a fitting anthem for his persona.
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