Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Humorous: Uses self‑deprecating and situational jokes, like joking about drinking: “To bebado desde o ano passado. Isso é lindo” and texting “Sim” to “Gosta de beber oq?” “Gosta de beber oq?… Sim”.
- Affectionate: Shows warmth toward people and things he likes, e.g. “Eu amo essa insuportavelmente” about someone and “Acho lindo o carinho com que frieren ta sendo adaptado”.
- Curious: Enjoys learning/logic, calling SQL fun because it feels like set theory: “Gosto SQL pq parece sempre que to fazendo exercício de teoria dos conjuntos”, and bio “do maths” suggests intellectual interest.
- Resilient: Deals with health and life issues on his own: “As vezes é doido ser basicamente funcional e resolver os b.o de saúde sozinho” and keeps joking even when frustrated by exams, bureaucracy, or delays.
- Supportive: Engages positively with friends and creators, like making João like ITZY: “Fazendo João amar ITZY” and being “fã” in a quoted tweet: “sou fã”.
Weaknesses:
- Profanity‑heavy: Frequently uses strong language and insults, for example “VAI TOMAR NO CU SAMUEL LINO” and “LIXO PODRES HORRÍVEIS VAI SE FODER”.
- Impulsive‑reactive: Posts intense reactions in the moment, like raging at players and matches: “É mt cara burro. Pqp” and “caralho que ep chato”.
- Cynical: Shows a jaded outlook, e.g. describing Twitter as an “experience”: “Twitter certamente é uma experiencia” and wishing for lovebombing again: “So queria viver um lovebombing dnv”.
- Heavy‑drinking: Repeatedly references alcohol in an intense way, like being drunk since last year: “To bebado desde o ano passado. Isso é lindo” and joking that he likes to drink “Sim”: “Gosta de beber oq?… Sim”.
- Self‑neglecting: Hints at pushing himself too hard or not caring for health, like staying awake “121872718 horas” before going to the beach: “me chamando pra praia msm eu estando ha 121872718 horas acordado” and nearly taking stimulants for a game: “Quase tomando rebite pra terminar minha viagem no eurotruck”.
Your Simpsons character
Homer Simpson
The mix of self-deprecating chaos, impulsive decisions, and unexpectedly sincere moments lines up most closely with Homer Simpson. Like Homer constantly bouncing between work stress, family drama, and goofy hobbies, this user swings from football meltdowns like “VAI TOMAR NO CU SAMUEL LINO” to nerdy enthusiasm such as “Gosto SQL pq parece sempre que to fazendo exercício de teoria dos conjuntos”. There’s a very Homer-esque relationship with booze and bad decisions in posts like “To bebado desde o ano passado. Isso é lindo” and “Cabei de beber a pior cerveja ja produzida. Se bobear tem metanol nessa merda”. The dramatic sports reactions and over-the-top frustration, for example “LIXO PODRES HORRÍVEIS VAI SE FODER”, mirror Homer yelling at the TV during games. At the same time, there are glimpses of warmth and competence—caring about work, study, and life logistics—in tweets like “O legal é que vo começar 2026 empregado :)” and “As vezes é doido ser basicamente funcional e resolver os b.o de saúde sozinho”, which fits Homer’s often-overlooked responsible side beneath the chaos.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENTP
They lean Extraverted (E): they constantly narrate social life, parties and public experiences, like joking about being drunk for days in “To bebado desde o ano passado. Isso é lindo”, complaining about students on the bus in “Mt foda quando entra estudante no ônibus fedendo a vodka com energético”, and hyping events like IEM Rio in “E ano que vem que vou a IEM Rio”, suggesting energy from interaction rather than withdrawal. Their bio “do maths” and tweets like “Gosto SQL pq parece sempre que to fazendo exercício de teoria dos conjuntos” show comfort with abstractions, patterns and theory, indicating Intuition (N) over concrete detail. The tone is blunt, analytical and often mocking, prioritizing evaluation over harmony, such as in “é impossível reprovar no exame teorico do detran”, “Inicio de fairy tail é ruim dms pqp”, and “É mt cara burro. Pqp”, which aligns with Thinking (T). Their lifestyle reads as spontaneous and flexible rather than structured: they talk about staying awake for ages before going to the beach in “o @ojribeiro__ me chamando pra praia msm eu estando ha 121872718 horas acordado”, joking about handling health issues alone in “As vezes é doido ser basicamente funcional e resolver os b.o de saúde sozinho”, and impulsively tearing down and rebuilding a PC in “tirei todas as peças e coloquei denovo. ele voltou a ligar normalmente”, all typical of a Perceiving (P) preference. Combining this socially expressive, abstract, sharp‑tongued, improvisational style points most strongly to ENTP.
Some pickup lines for you
- You said SQL feels like doing set theory — how about we test if {Dan} ∩ {me} = {perfect match} over a beer, since your answer to “gosta de beber oq?” is just “sim” anyway?
- You’re out here calling Grand Blue “one of the animes ever” and still almost dropping shows over one annoying character… if you can be that patient with anime, maybe you can tank my entire filler-arc personality too.
- You beat Hollow Knight, are going to IEM Rio, play Euro Truck at absurd hours, and still survived a Detran theoretical exam you swear is impossible to fail — statistically speaking, I think you can carry one more side quest: going out with me.
- If watching Frieren lovingly adapted already makes you happy, imagine a slice-of-life where 2026 starts employed, your Mercado Livre delivery arrives on time, Vasco never plays, and I’m next to you complaining about Samuel Lino missing sitters.
- You live in ℝ³ × (0, +∞), but every time you tweet about starting 2026 employed, killing the Radiância Absoluta, and being drunk since last year, it feels like your happiness function has a global maximum exactly when I slide into your DMs.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Math grad who games too much, survives DETRAN exams, and still can’t believe my mom once forgot my age. Anime, football, SQL, and late-night coffee.– @nielhtml
Your signature cocktail
The Cronicamente Online Negroni
This cocktail is strong and slightly chaotic, like someone who says they’ve been “drunk since last year” while tweeting “To bebado desde o ano passado. Isso é lindo”. The base is coffee-infused cachaça, a nod to Brazilian roots and to surviving days like “to ha 2 dias sem tomar café e acho que to passando mal de abstinencia. pqp”. A bitter orange aperitivo represents the salty football rage of “VAI TOMAR NO CU SAMUEL LINO” and “Imagina torcer pro vasco KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK”, balancing sweetness with suffering. The energy drink reduction captures the cracked gamer/anime grind of “Namoral eu não canso nunca de jogar hollow knight” and “que experiencia é assistir pain x fluxo”. A dash of sea salt solution is for the one-ritual-a-year beach trips in “Indo realizar o ritual de primeira e única vez indo a praia no ano” and the permanently slightly salty mood. Finally, the lime peel twist adds a sharp, bright finish for the mathematically-minded shitposter who can say “Gosto SQL pq parece sempre que to fazendo exercício de teoria dos conjuntos” right after complaining “ser cronicamente online é foda”.
Your Hogwarts House
Ravenclaw
Dan’s bio literally says “do maths” and his location is written as “R³ X (0, +∞)”, which is a very Ravenclaw way to flex comfort with abstract math and notation. He repeatedly shows enjoyment of intellectual/analytical activities, like when he connects SQL to set theory in “Gosto SQL pq parece sempre que to fazendo exercício de teoria dos conjuntos”, and when he talks about research in “Vo ter que largar a pesquisa”. There’s also a nerdy enthusiasm for complex games/anime that reward analysis and persistence, e.g. Hollow Knight in “Namoral eu não canso nunca de jogar hollow knight” and trying hard challenges like “É hoje que mato a radiancia absoluta”, which fits Ravenclaw’s love of mastering difficult systems. Even his offhand comment about being “basicamente funcional e resolver os b.o de saúde sozinho” in “As vezes é doido ser basicamente funcional e resolver os b.o de saúde sozinho” shows a self-reliant, problem-solving mindset characteristic of Ravenclaws more than the showy bravado of Gryffindor or the cutthroat ambition of Slytherin. Overall, the strongest throughline is curiosity, analytical thinking, and enjoyment of learning/complexity rather than loyalty-first Hufflepuff vibes or pure competitiveness, making Ravenclaw the best fit.
Your movie
Your song
Céu Azul - Charlie Brown Jr.
A song that fits Dan is Céu Azul by Charlie Brown Jr., because it mixes irony, frustration with life, and a kind of stubborn hope, just like his timeline. He swings between joking about overdrinking and chaos, like “To bebado desde o ano passado. Isso é lindo” and “[1/24, 23:27]: Gosta de beber oq? [1/24, 23:28] Daniel Lourenço: Sim”, and moments of quiet vulnerability, like “As vezes é doido ser basicamente funcional e resolver os b.o de saúde sozinho”. The song’s theme of navigating a messy life while still looking for some kind of balance fits tweets where he complains about adulting and bureaucracy, like “Cara, vtnc. Custa quase 300 reais pra tirar passaporte” and joking about work and future, such as “O legal é que vo começar 2026 empregado :)”. At the same time, he clearly finds joy in small things—anime, games, football, music—as in “Namoral eu não canso nunca de jogar hollow knight” and “Acho lindo o carinho com que frieren ta sendo adaptado”, echoing the song’s bittersweet but hopeful tone. Céu Azul captures that blend of sarcasm, emotional weariness, and a desire to keep going that runs through his tweets.
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