
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
This user most closely matches Lisa Simpson: smart, self-aware, a little melodramatic in a funny way, and constantly oscillating between nihilism and earnest joy. Like Lisa, they’re intellectually stubborn and proud of figuring things out themselves, as in “Never on my life will I 'comment' on a food Instagram's post in order to access a recipe. I will just figure it out on my own, because I am intelligent and resourceful”. Their deep cinephile streak and emotional masochism about movies—“Watched 'In The Mood For Love' at 8:30am this morning to put myself in the lowest possible mental state…” and “Yes, I can watch 4 movies in a day without a second thought”—fit Lisa’s obsessive, artsy side. The mix of depressive humor and finding life-meaning in small pleasures, like “every banh mi I have changes my life for the better” and “little high, getting falafel, and sitting in the grass… to look at dogs is my ssri”, echoes Lisa’s tendency to cling to tiny joys in a world that overwhelms her. Finally, their moral streak about online behavior and culture—“Living to see people get Mad Online at Pitchfork's best songs of the 90's list. Just go outside, you babies! Log off!” and “people who rush to the front and do not follow plane deboarding protocols will see their place in hell”—mirrors Lisa’s judgmental but ultimately principled sense of right and wrong.

Your MBTI personality Type
They lean Introvert: many tweets highlight solitary, low-key pleasures like watching multiple movies alone (“Yes, I can watch 4 movies in a day without a second thought. Yes, it takes me about 4 days to work up to watching a single 30 minute episode of television”) and sitting in parks people‑watching and reading (“little high, getting falafel, and sitting in the grass in 50 degree but sunny weather at rittenhouse park to look at dogs is my ssri”), with a strong undercurrent of self‑reflection rather than overt social energy. They are clearly iNtuitive: they repeatedly turn concrete situations into wry, existential or conceptual takes, like framing a delayed ferry as an oddly cinematic episode (“Convo with my sister just reminded me of being stranded in Holyhead, Wales... and I sat in the ferry lobby watching 1.5 seasons of 'Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt'...”) or joking about life meaning evaporating after losing an omakase reservation (“Life truly has had no meaning since losing my recurring omakase reservation”). Their tone suggests Feeling over Thinking: values, aesthetics, and emotional reactions dominate—such as choosing joy over health (“I will take the whatever number of years off of my lifespan rather than sub out white rice for a 'healthier' alternative”) and getting deeply moved and melodramatic about films and songs (“Watched 'In The Mood For Love' at 8:30am this morning to put myself in the lowest possible mental state...”, “ruining every first date by getting overly emotional explaining how 'One Last Kiss' by Hikaru Utada is potentially the greatest song ever created”). They skew Perceiving: there’s a sense of spontaneity and flexible, slightly chaotic life approach—planning to be in the indie theater every night instead of budgeting for Christmas gifts (“I just figured out a way to be in my local indie movie theater every single evening... so I will not be able to afford Christmas presents”), joking about submitting an exam with only 5/20 questions done (“'perfection is the enemy of progress' i say out loud as i submit an exam answering only 5 out of 20 questions”), and framing impulsive food orders as fate (“'there but for the grace of god go i', i mutter as i click 'confirm' on a $60 order of food delivery”). Taken together—introverted, imaginative, values-driven, and flexible in structure—they best fit INFP.

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Film, foster cats & banh mi in Philadelphia. Once watched 1.5 seasons of Kimmy Schmidt in a Welsh ferry terminal and decided life’s too short for bad rice swaps.– @nimznimznimz

Your signature cocktail
This is a strong but slightly off-kilter negroni riff for someone who says “Yes, I can watch 4 movies in a day without a second thought.” Vietnamese coffee–infused gin nods to their banh mi obsession and the way they mutter “Lisan Al Gaib” when the shop remembers their order, while also giving enough caffeine-jitters energy to schedule being at the indie theater “every single evening” as in this post. Black sesame orgeat and an ube milk bread crumble rim reference their baking life—from “Scallion Oil Saturday, baybeeee” to the “ube milk bread” and being in demand for “four straight days of nonstop baking.” Salted plum & lemongrass bitters bring in the travel-logged melancholy of being stranded in Holyhead watching Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (“sat in the ferry lobby watching 1.5 seasons…”) and their habit of making decisions by thinking “I'm gonna die anyway” but in a weirdly positive way. A dry vermouth spritz keeps it from turning too sweet, matching the tone of someone who both says “Microdosing craving the sweet release of death” and simultaneously declares that every banh mi and every cat foster is a reason to keep going (“every banh mi I have changes my life for the better”, “every day is in fact their birthday”).

Your Hogwarts House
This account reads clearest as Ravenclaw: their whole persona is built around taste, analysis, and slightly tortured self-awareness. They constantly frame life through art and media, like watching In the Mood for Love at 8:30am specifically to emotionally calibrate the year (“Watched 'In The Mood For Love' at 8:30am this morning to put myself in the lowest possible mental state such that the rest of my year could only go upwards from there”) and overthinking runtime vs. emotional effort in film vs. TV (“Yes, I can watch 4 movies in a day without a second thought. Yes, it takes me about 4 days to work up to watching a single 30 minute episode of television”). There’s a very Ravenclaw-ish obsession with categorization and meta-commentary, like being nauseated by a newly discovered grammar rule (“Only just learning of the grammatical rule that numbers below ten should be written out as full words and larger numbers than 10 should be digits and now I feel nauseous”) and clowning people who rate films 82/100 on Letterboxd as over-precise (“People who assign scores out of 100 on letterboxd are insane. Exactly how is a movie an 82/100?”). Their humor is very much about intellectualized taste and niche references—Hikaru Utada, Melt-Banana, Pavement, Sofia Coppola, Hamaguchi—paired with self-aware melodrama (“Getting the urge to either burn my life down or to compulsively post my way through said urge So here I am”). They are loyal and kind (fostering cats, baking for family, enduring weddings), but the through-line is a brain that’s always observing, curating, and quipping from the balcony rather than diving in headfirst like a Gryffindor or single-mindedly scheming like a Slytherin, which puts them firmly in Ravenclaw.

Your movie

Your song
Carly Rae Jepsen is already central to their personal lore: they literally built a wedding fantasy around “Cut To The Feeling” and then decided they’d rather stay single than repeat it, saying they’d “rather die alone than be unoriginal” about entering a reception to that song “Have come to the conclusion that I cannot get married because a friend of mine entered the reception with his new wife to 'Cut To The Feeling' by Carly Rae Jepsen, which I was planning on doing, and I'd rather die alone than be unoriginal”. The song’s maximalist, euphoric pop energy fits someone who treats small pleasures as life-saving—like how every banh mi becomes a reason to keep going “Ate both banh mi and onigiri in the park while switching between watching dogs and reading today. Something something never kill yourself” and “Seeing 'Pride & Prejudice' (2005) on the big screen may have made me want to die, but I got a banh mi right afterwards and it made me want to continue living”. Their whole vibe is intense, romantic about art, and slightly melodramatic in a self-aware way—watching In the Mood for Love at 8:30am just to start the year at emotional rock bottom “Watched 'In The Mood For Love' at 8:30am this morning to put myself in the lowest possible mental state such that the rest of my year could only go upwards from there”. “Cut To The Feeling” is about wanting to skip the small talk and plunge directly into overwhelming feeling, which matches their tendency to go straight to maximal experience—four movies in a day, compulsive baking, or hijacking the aux with Japanese noise rock “Yes, I can watch 4 movies in a day without a second thought” and “gonna hijack the aux at the pre wedding Sangeet tonight and only play BLEACH to educate the bride and grooms' families on the power of Japanese noise rock”. The song encapsulates their mix of pop nerdiness, big feelings, and a slightly chaotic, life-affirming hunger for joy.

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