notkyleforgeard
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green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Humorous: His tweet 'Watching sex scenes in movies with your parents is AWFUL worse than watching the debate' shows his knack for turning awkward moments into relatable comedy.
- Passionate: His devotion to Fairfield sports teams, as seen in 'Whenever a Stag team is ranked I become their biggest fan,' reflects his enthusiastic nature.
- Self-Aware: Kyle’s reflection on his post-grad life, like 'It really went from 10 beers and 15 house shots Thursday at the sea grape to 2 Coors Lights and some appetizers at company happy hour,' shows his ability to laugh at himself.
- Nostalgic: His longing for college days, as seen in 'Oh what I would do to be sneaking a handle of vodka and some Marlboro Reds into a freshman dorm right now,' highlights his sentimental side.
- Athletic: His pride in hitting a walk-off grand slam in softball, calling it a 'Top 2 moment of my sports life,' shows his competitive and active lifestyle.
Weaknesses:
- Overindulgent: His tweet 'Feels like a 5 vodka red bull Tuesday night at the sea grape kind of night' suggests he might sometimes go overboard with partying.
- Procrastinator: His tweet 'That time of the day at work where I will spend the rest of the day looking through college Snapchat memories' shows a tendency to get distracted.
- Overly Nostalgic: Frequent mentions of missing college, like 'Damn I miss college,' might indicate a difficulty fully embracing the present.
- Self-Critical: His tweet 'Freshman 15? More like post grad 20. I’m getting so fat' reflects a tendency to be hard on himself.
- Impulsive: His 'sprinting to my car to pretend I was a major healthcare company CEO' tweet shows a tendency to act on whims.
Your Simpsons character
Homer Simpson
Kyle mirrors Homer Simpson's mix of humor, love for beer, and occasional existential musings. His tweet 'Pooping on company time already feels awesome, but pooping on company time in your home bathroom is an unexplainable feeling' is a sentiment Homer would wholeheartedly agree with. Like Homer, Kyle balances a love for indulgence, as seen in 'Feels like a 5 vodka red bull Tuesday night,' with moments of self-reflection, such as 'I think I’m hitting my mid-life crisis.' Both are lovable, relatable, and a bit chaotic.
Your MBTI personality Type
ESFP
Kyle embodies the ESFP personality type: extroverted, sensing, feeling, and perceiving. His extroversion shines in his love for social events and Fairfield sports, like 'Post grad Santa Con.' His sensing side is evident in his focus on experiences, such as 'Uh oh blue mountains, chilled glass, and my parents left me home alone.' Feeling comes through in his humor and relatability, as seen in 'Watching sex scenes in movies with your parents is AWFUL.' Finally, his perceiving trait is clear in his spontaneous, go-with-the-flow attitude, like 'Sprinted to my car this morning to pretend I was a major healthcare company CEO.'
Some pickup lines for you
- Are you a Fairfield Stag? Because you’ve got me cheering for you like it’s game day.
- Is your name Coors Light? Because you’re as refreshing as a chilled glass on a Friday night.
- Are you the Seagrape? Because I’d set a record just to spend time with you.
- Are you a Crunch Wrap Supreme? Because I’d stand in the rain just to get a taste of you.
- Are you a softball game? Because you’re a walk-off grand slam in my life.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Post-grad life enthusiast. Stags & Friar Basketball devotee. Holder of dubious records at The Seagrape & Fairchild Wheeler Golf Course. Beer, banter, and Boston sports. Once ate a Crunch Wrap Supreme in the rain.– @notkyleforgeard
Your signature cocktail
The Stag Slammer
The 'Stag Slammer' reflects Kyle’s energetic, sports-loving, and party-ready personality. Whiskey represents his boldness, as seen in 'Feels like a 5 vodka red bull Tuesday night.' Cranberry juice ties to his New England roots, and the splash of Red Bull captures his high-energy antics like 'Sprinted to my car to pretend I was a major healthcare company CEO.' The lime wedge adds a playful twist, much like his humor in 'Watching sex scenes in movies with your parents is AWFUL.' It’s the perfect drink for a Fairfield Stag.
Your Hogwarts House
Gryffindor
Kyle fits Gryffindor with his bold, outgoing personality and love for competition. His tweet about hitting a walk-off grand slam in softball shows his courage and determination. His humorous and confident approach to life, as seen in 'Liking every girl on Hinge this morning wishing them Happy Christmas,' reflects Gryffindor's daring nature. While he has a nostalgic side, his willingness to jump into situations, like 'sprinting to my car to pretend I was a major healthcare company CEO,' highlights his adventurous streak.
Your movie
Your song
Mr. Brightside - The Killers
Kyle’s mix of humor, nostalgia, and chaotic energy pairs well with 'Mr. Brightside.' His tweet 'It really went from 10 beers and 15 house shots Thursday at the sea grape to 2 Coors Lights and some appetizers at company happy hour' reflects the song’s theme of longing and adapting to change. The upbeat yet reflective tone of the song matches Kyle’s personality, as seen in tweets like 'New year same me. Onwards!'
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