
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
They line up most closely with Lisa Simpson: a smart, justice-minded nerd with very specific, slightly niche obsessions. Like Lisa, they’re intellectually inclined and principled, calling themself “your local law nerd” and staking out clear moral lines in their bio. Their mix of fandom brain and earnest art/theatre love (e.g., holding out hope for an Ace Attorney announcement while tweeting about Hadestown and Wicked, and analyzing the human condition in a TADC musical idea) mirrors Lisa’s combination of bookishness and deep emotional engagement with stories. They also have Lisa’s tendency to oscillate between intense sincerity and dark, dramatic humor, as seen in posts like “time to kill self apparently” and “okay so i should kill myself is what youre saying”, which read like hyperbolic venting from someone who feels things very deeply. Finally, their social awkwardness and self-aware experimentation with identity and appearance—such as “EXPOSURE THERAPY BY WEARING WHAT FEELS LIKE TOO MUCH MAKEUP TO WORK (its not)” and “learning how to do my makeup as an adult has been so fun actually”—recall Lisa’s journey of figuring out how to be herself while still wanting connection and validation.

Your MBTI personality Type
They seem more like an Extrovert (E) than an introvert: they constantly talk about friends, coworkers, and shared fandoms, and openly overshare personal moments, like “pooping while muted on a discord call and my two british friends are playing genshin” and chatting about a “pretty bartender called me lover and i fell in love a little bit”. Their interests and commentary are very Intuitive (N): they love hypothetical and symbolic takes, e.g. analyzing Hadestown’s meta-narrative in “there is something about the implication of the characters of Hadestown knowing theyre retelling Orpheus and Eurydice's story over and over again” and describing anxiety as “the eternal worm” in “convinced the eternal worm is going to devour me in 13 minutes”. They read as strongly Feeling (F): they lead with values (bio: “PROSHIP AND FATPHOBES DNI!!!”), react emotionally to media like “my heart just shattered into a million pieces btw”, and frame opinions around what feels hurtful or comforting rather than strict logic, as in “everyone hates on Sentimental Man a little too much, i think its a really cute song :(”. Finally, they lean Perceiving (P): they emphasize impatience and lack of structure, e.g. “im impatient as FUCKKK bro i need it NOW”, joke about being stuck in their job without a plan in “google how to come to terms with the fact you dont have any transferrable skills and are probably stuck in the amusement park industry forever”, and approach life in a spontaneous, experimental way, such as “considering dabbling in the hobby of driving drunk” (clearly hyperbolic but very P-coded). Putting this together, the blend of outgoing, fandom-driven energy, abstract/media meta-thinking, value-centric emotions, and loose, spur-of-the-moment lifestyle fits ENFP best.

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Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
21 | queer law nerd in CT who writes fic, overthinks musicals, and once chose a Bluetooth connection over basic human dignity– @obviouslesbiab

Your signature cocktail
A gin infused with rose petals nods to their Aphrodite devotion and queer romantic streak, matching the tender, yearning vibe of “propose to me with one of these (the color matters btw) and im yours forever. HIGHKEY.”. Blood orange liqueur brings a dramatic, slightly dark sweetness for lines like “time to kill self apparently” and the gleefully morbid humor of “living in connecticut and being subject to random anxiety induced paranoia episodes is so funny imo. why am i curled up on my bed in the dark convinced the eternal worm is going to devour me in 13 minutes”. Sparkling hard cider keeps the drink bubbly and approachable, echoing their chatty, fandom-heavy timeline and the casual chaos of “pooping while muted on a discord call and my two british friends are playing genshin. life has never felt more 2021”. A splash of blue curaçao references their law-nerd Ace Attorney side with courtroom-blue flair and their delight in characters like Phoenix, as in “TODAY IS PHOENIX WRIGHTS BIRTHDAY AND NO ONE TOLD ME??? IM THE FAKEST FUCKING FAN EVER”. The lemon twist and edible glitter capture their experimentation with aesthetics and makeup confidence-building in posts like “learning how to do my makeup as an adult has been so fun actually” and “EXPOSURE THERAPY BY WEARING WHAT FEELS LIKE TOO MUCH MAKEUP TO WORK (its not)”, giving the whole cocktail a dramatic, theatrical finish worthy of a musical-loving law nerd in an amusement-park world.

Your Hogwarts House
This user reads as a strongly creative, ideas-driven person who processes life through media, stories, and analysis, which aligns best with Ravenclaw. They constantly engage critically with narrative structure and themes, like unpacking Hadestown’s meta-tragedy in “there is something about the implication of the characters of Hadestown knowing theyre retelling Orpheus and Eurydice's story over and over again, but Hermes saying at the very beginning 'maybe it will turn out this time'...” and imagining a musical-episode-as-human-condition for TADC in the same tweet. Their timeline is full of thoughtful media commentary and niche observations—e.g. dissecting tonal differences in covers in “the tonal shift between Arctic Monkeys' original version of Do I Wanna Know and hozier's cover of it is something that keeps me up at night and makes me want to cry” and analyzing color/visual complaints about Wicked in “it is truly fascinating how ppl saw Wicked (both films) and said 'the coloring is too bright and an eyesore' queen do you know where we are 😭”. Their bio and tweets also show a law-nerd identity and fandom meta (Ace Attorney, fanfic, headcanons) such as crafting detailed headcanons in “dispatch headcanon: the mechaman suit ai voice is what Robert's grandma sounded like when her and Prime (grandpa Bobby) were young”, which signal a love of systems, lore, and interpretation over pure vibes or social dominance. While they have flashes of Gryffindor-ish bluntness (e.g. “PROSHIP AND FATPHOBES DNI!!! YALL WEIRD”), the dominant pattern is intellectual curiosity, niche humor, and interpretive creativity—classic Ravenclaw energy rather than the steadier loyalty of Hufflepuff or the overt ambition of Slytherin.

Your movie

Your song
A song about being messy, self-aware, and a little bit unhinged in a funny, online way fits them perfectly. They joke about dark or reckless impulses like “considering dabbling in the hobby of driving drunk” and “time to kill self apparently”, mirroring the song’s mix of angst and flippant delivery. Their timeline is a swirl of fandom obsession, thirst, and irreverent humor, from “sorry to hornypost on main but the beginning of dispatch episode 4 got me wettttttt” to “i wish i was a seahorse so i could get men pregnant”. At the same time, there’s a sensitive, reflective side in their love of musicals and narrative media, like “there is nothing more of the human condition than singing and dancing” and their attachment to shows like Hadestown and Ace Attorney. Sex, Drugs, Etc. captures that blend of chaotic humor, queerness, and underlying emotional complexity that runs through their feed.

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