
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Max shares the desperate, yearning energy and niche interests typical of Springfield's most prominent 'beta' character. Much like Milhouse’s obsessive nature, Max expresses a frantic devotion to his interests, notably pleading “extremely attracted to kylar from dol. please stalk me. please. please. PLEASE? PLEEAAASSE”. He exhibits a classic 'lovable loser' insecurity regarding his social circle, admitting “every time I see a person unfollows me I do a head count to make sure the oomfs I never interact with are still there”. Furthermore, his melodramatic reaction to a lack of content—“no new brief art they want me to kms”—perfectly mirrors Milhouse’s tendency to fall into deep despair over minor inconveniences or perceived slights.

Your MBTI personality Type
Max exhibits clear Introversion (I) through his reliance on online parasocial bonds and checking 'head counts' on “oomfs I never interact with” rather than outward social engagement. His Intuition (N) is seen in his deep immersion in fictional narratives and fan theories, such as his emotional attachment to “Kylar from DoL” and abstract, hyperbolic expressions of identity. He is a Feeling (F) type, making decisions based on intense personal values and emotional resonance, often using dramatic language like “he needs his wife to breathe” or expressing vulnerability. Finally, his Perceiving (P) nature is evident in his spontaneous, reaction-based posting style and his requests for immediate content injections like “send me every single trans man bl IMMEDIATELY”, suggesting a flexible and impulse-driven approach to his interests.

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Your new Twitter bio
Passionate about niche media, from the Lychee Light Club musical to manul conservation. Once sold my soul for merch; now I just advocate for trans-inclusive BL.– @pallazcatz

Your signature cocktail
This cocktail is a chaotic blend reflecting a user who is “extremely attracted to kylar from dol” and has a deep love for niche fandoms. The base of “apple juice” is spiked with sophisticated lychee to celebrate “kaneda's gay little dance” in the Light Club musical. It’s a strong, experimental drink for someone who admits they’ve been “feeling tired and miserable in pe” due to fasting but still finds time to hunt for a “ginger twink spotted 🔥”. The smoky finish honors the loss of “zelenogorsk, a legend upon manulkind”, making it the perfect beverage for a #manultwt regular.

Your Hogwarts House
Max displays the quintessential Hufflepuff trait of deep, quiet loyalty toward his community, admitting that “every time I see a person unfollows me I do a head count to make sure the oomfs I never interact with are still there”. His dedication to his niche interests, such as #manultwt and the Lychee Light Club musical, shows a hardworking fan who values finding joy in specific 'found families' or groups. He prioritizes fairness and inclusivity within his hobbies, as seen when he calls out fandom gatekeeping by noting that almost everyone is “either queer, poc, or supportive”. Furthermore, his mourning of the Pallas's cat Zelenogorsk, calling him “a legend upon manulkind”, highlights a soft-hearted nature and a capacity for kindness toward all living creatures.

Your movie

Your song
The song Teen Idle perfectly captures Max’s blend of self-deprecating humor and dark, adolescent angst found throughout his timeline. He frequently uses hyperbole regarding his mental state, such as when he claims he is “one step closer to slitting my throat and being happy in death” or when a lack of fanart makes him feel like “they want me to kms”. The track’s themes of body image and restrictive behavior also mirror his admission of “feeling tired and miserable in pe but it's lwk my fault bc I've been doing OMAD for 3 weeks”. Max embodies the specific brand of 'internet-core' melancholy that defines the song, oscillating between intense fandom obsession and profound personal isolation.

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