
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
This user most closely matches Bart Simpson: irreverent, chaotic, funny, and constantly oscillating between genuine angst and joking about it. Like Bart, he vents about school and authority with over-the-top frustration, e.g. complaining that a prof is ruining his life in “this maronite prof is genuinely ruining my life man” and mocking the corporate optimism of his uni career fair in “i need to drop out ASAP”. His humor is juvenile and provocative in a very Bart way, with posts like “fuck my engineer life” and the dark joke “7 dollars #suicidewatch”. He mixes real emotional turbulence and family drama—“im boiling with rage i hate my family”—with goofing around, such as his phone and music obsessions in “music haptics is such a cool feature dude the phone is vibrating to the beat” and “the weekly report is funnier every week man”. Overall, he feels like an older, extremely online Bart: a smart underachiever, constantly in trouble, using edgy jokes and pop culture (Evangelion, Bladee, Sematary) to cope with the chaos around him.

Your MBTI personality Type
They read as more introverted (I) than extroverted: most posts revolve around their inner world, media, and niche interests rather than big social scenes, e.g. obsessing over Evangelion and music (“episode 22 of eva is my favorite episode of anything ever”, “parents gave me their old tv i cant wait for the next evangelion rewatch”), and they vent about life and family rather than seeking broad social validation (“im boiling with rage i hate my family”). Their focus on patterns, symbolism, and niche aesthetics points to intuition (N): they continuously frame experiences through media and abstract vibes, like identifying with Asuka and joking about it meta-textually (“the wokest people in my life called me a fagggot when i declared that i was asuka”) or calling a picture "lowkey beautiful" for its feel rather than its concrete content (“this picture is lowkey beautiful”). Their tone is very blunt, analytical, and often cutting, suggesting thinking (T) over feeling: they mock institutions and people with detached cynicism (“went to my unis career fair and saw a sign that said 'Employers, You aren't just hiring students — You're hiring potential.' i need to drop out ASAP”) and make harsh jokes about groups and politics rather than prioritizing harmony (“this shit is frying me brah we need to turn the uae into a crater”). Their life seems chaotic and reactive, not structured, which fits perceiving (P): they complain about academic collapse and sleep irregularity (“week and half since ive drank a monster and my academic downfall has started this is so fucked”, “slept >5 hours for the first time in a month and im so happy”) and joke about procrastination and drifting through uni rather than following a strict plan (“ultra uneployed cs students will genuinely get mad at me for not going to the mall with them during midterm season”). Overall, the combination of inward focus, abstract/niche interests, cutting logical humor, and unstructured lifestyle most closely matches INTP.

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19 • Egyptian CS student surviving career fairs, haunted mound playlists & Eva rewatches. Once slept >5 hours and called it a renaissance.– @perfectviolaton

Your signature cocktail
This drink hits like a midterm you didn’t study for—loud, messy, and kind of beautiful—because they literally said “fuck my engineer life” and still keep going. The overproof rum is for the unhinged, sleep-deprived grind and late-night chaos of things like “slept >5 hours for the first time in a month and im so happy bro i love my friends so much”. The bitter aperitivo stands in for their boiling resentment and family/uni rage, from “im boiling with rage i hate my family” to “this maronite prof is genuinely ruining my life man”. The sour tamarind-lime mix mirrors that sharp, self-deprecating humor and suicidal ideation lurking under punchlines like “7 dollars #suicidewatch” and “fast life race against time it will outrun you”. The pomegranate syrup brings a deep red sweetness for the affection and attachment to music and characters—Evangelion, Bladee, Haunted Mound—from “episode 22 of eva is my favorite episode of anything ever” and “ive literally never missed anyone (alive) ever but i really miss bladee and yung lean”. Finally, smoked salt bitters echo the Arab diaspora identity and dark, scorched geopolitical jokes like “this shit is frying me brah we need to turn the uae into a crater”, giving the whole thing a nostalgic, burnt-edge finish—complicated, a little cursed, but undeniably memorable.

Your Hogwarts House
This user shows a very Ravenclaw mix of obsessive curiosity, niche interests, and self-aware humor. They clearly love digging deep into music and media, looping songs endlessly and analyzing tiny details, like when they say “the shaky autotune voice thing ghost did on this song is genuinely insane man wtfffff” and “i cant explain it but the way he says 'i know he hates me' is so fucking beautiful and works so well with the guitar”. Their fixation on Evangelion and character identity, e.g. “episode 22 of eva is my favorite episode of anything ever” and “the wokest people in my life called me a fagggot when i declared that i was asuka”, shows a reflective, interpretive mind that likes connecting fiction to self-concept. They also display a very analytical, somewhat overthinking student brain in tweets like “HES JUST MAKING US DO SHIT FUCK YOU MEAN HOW MANY 2 DIGIT PRIME NUMBERS BRUH” and the complaint about a career fair slogan in “i need to drop out ASAP”, which reads as intellectual cynicism rather than pure rebellion. Even their humor tends to be meta and referential, for instance calling something “some real autistic shit you wouldnt understand”, implying an in-group of people who get the niche references and details. While they have flashes of anger and self-preservation, the dominant through-line is a cerebral, media-obsessed, hyper-observant personality, which fits Ravenclaw more than the other houses.

Your movie

Your song
A well-fitting song for them is Ghost Mountain by Sematary, because their entire persona revolves around Witch House / Haunted Mound–style internet music and emotionally charged humor. They constantly reference Sematary and Haunted Mound, like when they wrote “sematarys songs are all so replayable dude this is genuinely insane” and “EVERYTHING IS NEW WHEN YOU SEE ME BOY SALUTE 🫡”, echoing the aggressive confidence and cultish fan energy of the song. Their darker, suicidal humor and frustration with life, as in “7 dollars #suicidewatch” and “fuck my engineer life”, matches the bleak, haunted tone of Ghost Mountain. At the same time, they show deep attachment to niche music scenes, posting things like “true peak music real shit i love music so beautiful” and “this has been on loop since the second it dropped its so fucking good man”, which fits the obsessive fandom and emotional intensity baked into Sematary’s sound. The mix of rage, humor, and internet-poisoned sentiment across their timeline makes Ghost Mountain feel like their natural soundtrack.

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