
postmortemist
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Moe Szyslak is the most fitting parallel because he is a chronic pessimist, often suicidal, and socially isolated, traits echoed in the user's repeated self‑destruction and nihilistic statements. The user writes, "Happy is he who swallows a cyanide pill and shoots himself in the head," and "I am anticipating my suspension and my suicide every day," mirroring Moe’s frequent expressions of hopelessness and his bar‑room suicide attempts. Their self‑loathing is evident in tweets like "I am by far the most terrible human being there has ever been" and "I am miserable and disgusting," which align with Moe’s own self‑critical view of being a worthless bartender. Additionally, the user's contempt for others—"You people boast about having 'media literacy' and end up having the same views..."—reflects Moe’s misanthropic attitude toward the town’s residents. Overall, the combination of depressive ideation, misanthropy, and a desire to be removed from social interaction matches Moe’s character.

Your MBTI personality Type
The user shows a strong focus on inner feelings, e.g., "I am miserable and disgusting..." and "I am by far the most terrible human being." Their content is dominated by abstract, philosophical references such as "Morality is metaphysical syphilis" and "Cioran" indicating an intuitive (N) style. Decision making is driven by personal values and emotional tone, seen in statements like "Happy is he who swallows a cyanide pill and shoots himself in the head" and "I love the ocean and shota, irreligiousness and godlessness," reflecting feeling (F). The tweet style is chaotic and spontaneous, with lines like "Fuck... I need to make a new acc" and "I am anticipating my suspension and my suicide every day," suggesting a perceiving (P) orientation.

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Your new Twitter bio
Philosophy nerd, gaming fan, dark-humor writer. Once ranked Nietzsche’s works as if they were video-game tiers. Searching for meaning in chaos.– @postmortemist

Your signature cocktail
The "Abyssal Nihilist" is a murky, bitter concoction that mirrors the user's self‑destructive worldview. Dark absinthe and black vodka give it an inky depth, while activated charcoal and a splash of lime cut through the gloom like their occasional sharp sarcasm. A drizzle of grenadine adds a fleeting hint of blood, echoing lines such as “Happy is he who swallows a cyanide pill and shoots himself in the head.” The drink’s bitter finish reflects tweets like “I am miserable and disgusting…not to god, ofc, since he's too retarded.” Finally, the smoky licorice garnish nods to the chaotic, nihilistic vibe of “Fear & loathing” in their bio.

Your Hogwarts House
The user repeatedly cites philosophers such as Nietzsche, Wittgenstein, and Cioran, e.g., "If I were to rank Nietzsche's works, I would put Genealogy of Morality on the S tier…" which shows a focus on intellectual analysis. They also use philosophical reflections to critique morality, as in "Morality makes stupid. Nietzsche". Their self‑descriptive statements are framed in a detached, analytical tone, like "To resign oneself or to blow out one’s brains, that is the choice one faces at certain moments. Cioran". This pattern of valuing knowledge, critical thought, and literary reference aligns most closely with Ravenclaw’s emphasis on wisdom and learning.

Your movie

Your song
The account’s constant self‑destruction, nihilism, and yearning for oblivion align with the bleak tone of “Hurt”. The lyric “I hurt myself today / To see if I still feel” mirrors tweets like “I am miserable and disgusting…that’s why I flagellate myself.” Repeated expressions such as “I am by far the most terrible human being there has ever been” and “Happy is he who swallows a cyanide pill and shoots himself in the head” echo the song’s refrain “What have I become?”. References to nihilist philosophers (Nietzsche, Cioran) and the feeling of being a “broken man” match the song’s introspective despair. Overall, the song captures the user’s self‑loathing, emptiness, and yearning for an end, making it the most fitting choice.

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