Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Creative artist: Maia frequently shares her own illustrations and mentions her "condition called can’t stop drawing liam".
- Community engaged: She hosts a podcast with friends and regularly interacts with followers on her "strawpage".
- Witty humor: She displays sharp comedic timing, such as her joke about "catchy a flight" to solicit safe flight wishes.
- Unapologetically passionate: Her dedication to Oasis is immense, having attended multiple Live 25 nights and "grovelling under Liam’s tweets".
- Technologically nostalgic: She appreciates vintage aesthetics, using a "cheap ass 90s point and shoot" to capture concerts.
Weaknesses:
- Poor planning: She ended up "making the 1.5hr bus journey" hungover in extreme heat because she forgot her car at a party.
- Obsessive fixation: She admits to hyper-fixating on strange details like "Liam Gallagher’s dental amalgam fillings".
- Impulsive spender: She readily admits that "sometimes things that are more expensive.. are better" when justifying luxury skincare over basics.
- Hyperbolic negativity: She uses extreme language for minor inconveniences, such as wanting to "kill herself" over musical comparisons.
- Shallow judgment: She confessed to "stopped seeing someone because their hairline was this bad", acknowledging her own vanity.
Your Simpsons character
Otto Mann
Maia embodies the high-energy, music-obsessed, and slightly chaotic spirit of Springfield's favorite rocker, Otto Mann. Much like Otto, her life revolves around live gigs and a deep devotion to rock legends, frequently documenting her wild nights like when she got “absolutely munted at a party” or spent her time “grovelling under Liam’s tweets.” Her specialized knowledge of band members, such as “gem archer’s moe feathers”, mirrors Otto's niche passion for heavy metal and guitarists. Ultimately, her enthusiastic and unfiltered commentary on the touring lifestyle, including her lament that “sometimes things that are more expensive.. are better”, aligns perfectly with Otto's lovable, burnout-adjacent persona.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
Maia exhibits Extroversion (E) through her high-energy, social presence, hosting a spontaneous podcast and “absolutely mucking it at a party” before embarking on long hungover journeys. Her Intuitive (N) side is shown in her creative life as an artist and her tendency to use hyperbolic, metaphorical language, such as calling Liam Gallagher a “poor little meow meow” or finding deeper meaning in his dental work. She is a clear Feeler (F), as her tweets are driven by intense emotional reactions, noting that a specific song makes her “heart sink and i wanna cry”. Finally, her Perceiving (P) trait is evident in her self-admitted lack of organization, stating her podcast is “always very spontaneous because we’re in different time zones/have jobs” and frequently posting about chaotic, unplanned situations.
Some pickup lines for you
- Are you a 53mm round brush? Because I’m ready to let you be my vice and give me a little lift.
- I promise I’ll never sneakily slip off my wedding ring at an Irish pub, but I’d definitely let you catch a 1.5-hour bus ride just to pick me up.
- Is your name Liam? Because I’ve got a terminal condition where I can’t stop drawing you into my life.
- Forget the Laneige—I think you’re the only thing that’s actually better than my usual routine.
- I won’t offer you a light show with too many lasers, but I’d definitely do the Poznan for you at Live 27.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Melbourne-based artist and digital creator. Passionate about music history and live performance. Once mistook a stranger for Gem Archer at a local Irish pub.– @pulpwhore
Your signature cocktail
The Champagne Supernova Hangover
This drink captures Maia’s chaotic energy, from getting “absolutely munted at a party” to her refined taste in skincare. The smoky base reflects her obsession with the Gallagher brothers' vices, while the bright blue hue mimics the “fucking HELL cool it with the lasers” intensity of a Liam concert. It’s a bittersweet mix that feels like the emotional comedown of “listening to champagne supernova after live 25”, serving both high-end luxury and 'point and shoot' 90s nostalgia. Best served while “playing the bass poorly” or grovelling in Liam’s replies.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Maia exhibits the Slytherin traits of ambition and resourcefulness through her active personal branding, managing a “podcast” and consistently “grovelling under Liam’s tweets” in a calculated pursuit of a reply. She possesses a sharp, biting wit and a penchant for “being shallow” based on aesthetics, showing a classic Slytherin preference for status and appearance. Her self-preservation and unapologetic honesty are evident when she admits that “sometimes things that are more expensive.. are better”. Furthermore, her intense, almost possessive loyalty to her specific 'inner circle' of idols and friends, paired with a “lascivious” and observational eye, cements her place in the house of the silver and green.
Your movie
Your song
Cigarettes & Alcohol - Oasis
Maia’s online presence is a chaotic, high-energy tribute to the rock 'n' roll lifestyle, making this Oasis anthem her perfect match. She frequently documents her late-night antics, such as being “absolutely munted at a party last night” and drunkenly begging “liam come to the irish club”. Her life mirrors the song's themes of hedonism and escapism, whether she's “playing the bass poorly” or obsessing over Liam Gallagher’s vices like “cigarettes, booze, blow, and a 53mm round brush”. Ultimately, her unfiltered dedication to the Live 25 era and her self-proclaimed “terminal” obsession with the band embody the raw, rebellious spirit of the track.
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