
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
They most closely match Lisa Simpson: introspective, anxious, sharp-tongued, and strongly opinionated. Like Lisa, they’re politically and socially aware, calling out racism and hypocrisy in culture, e.g. “COMO SE A COREIA NAO FOSSE RACISTA” and criticizing religious and paranormal charlatanism in “os warrens merecendo é prisao perpetua eu odeio tanto o quanto a midia conseguiu idolatrar esses asquerosos charlatões pedofilos de merda”. They’re also artistic and fandom-oriented like Lisa with her music and books, shown by their fixation on bands and media such as “NOVA MUSICA DA MITSKI TA BANGER PRA CARALHO” and references to Interview with the Vampire and Hannibal (“when fui ver o filme de entrevista com o vampiro”, “will e hannibal”). Their self-critical, depressed tone and frustration with shallow positivity echo Lisa’s melancholic side, like when they write “acabei de sair na terapia porra eu nao aguento mais me falarem pra parar de ser negativo como se ser positivo fosse ajudar em alguma merda” and darker posts such as “quero morrer”. Finally, they show care and attachment beneath the cynicism—especially about their cat literally saving their life in “nn ironicamente mei gato me impediu de me matar”—which fits Lisa’s blend of vulnerability, moral intensity, and deep emotional bonds.

Your MBTI personality Type
They lean Introvert (I): despite wanting friends for events like “ninguém…. ninguem pra ir comigo no baoboas….”, they often describe solitary inner experiences, like intense anxiety about social media “por algum motivo tenho uma ansiedade ABSMAL de usar o instagram” and long, introspective rants about therapy “eu nao aguento mais me falarem pra parar de ser negativo”. Their focus on meanings, possibilities, and hypothetical scenarios suggests Intuition (N), such as musing about vampires and gender “se vc eh vampiro e se descobre trans nao da pra fazer cirurgia nenhuma” and commenting on media tropes or fandom dynamics rather than concrete facts, like “consequência direta do yuri verde”. They are highly values-driven and emotionally expressive, pointing to Feeling (F): they react strongly to injustice “os warrens merecendo é prisao perpetua… charlatões pedofilos de merda”, feel deeply about music and shows “parem de falar do show do mcr eu fico real mal vontade de chorar muito”, and openly discuss pain and suicidality “talvez eu precise me matar”. Their life appears unstructured and reactive rather than planned, pointing to Perceiving (P): they talk about maybe quitting Twitter later “provavelmente mes q vem eu vou largar o twitter por um tempinho”, impulse changes like “pensando em alisar essa merda dnv”, and more spontaneous commentary than organized goals. Overall, the combination of introspection, emotional intensity, idealistic values, and loose lifestyle organization best fits INFP.

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Your new Twitter bio
Transmasc goblin with loud opinions, old-Twitter colors, and a cat that once stopped a very bad day. Horror, MCR, and overthinking for a living.– @rafminsk

Your signature cocktail
This drink starts with cachaça infused with black coffee for the chaotic, sleep-deprived transmasc emo energy that tweets about Mitski and MCR while doomscrolling, like when they said “NOVА MUSICA DA MITSKI TA BANGER PRA CARALHO” and begged people to stop talking about the MCR show because it makes them want to cry, “parem de falar do show do mcr eu fico real mal vontade de chorar muito”. Blood orange bitters bring a dramatic, sharp bite that matches their violent humor and flair for hyperbole in lines like “tenho vontade de cometer um crime de odio” and “morra snoopy ia” in “morra snoopy ia”. A Guaraná reduction syrup nods to their very Brazilian, broke-but-fun vibe and food takes, especially when they complain about pizza prices and mention Guaraná: “eu sempre compro de no maximo estralando 45 com guarana original”. The activated charcoal ice cube is the goth, suicidal humor core—heavy but contained—echoing tweets like “talvez eu precise me matar” and “nn ironicamente mei gato me impediu de me matar”, turning the darkness into an aesthetic instead of a conclusion. Finally, a dash of salt captures their messy tenderness and body/image angst, from bitching about their uterus in “estou MORRENDO de dor vai se fuder utero” to wearing a binder because of what their mom said about their chest, “minha mae me convenceu que meus peitos sao feios agr so ando de binder 💗”, making the cocktail strong, slightly bitter, oddly sweet, and deeply, aggressively personal.

Your Hogwarts House
They show a strong instinct for self‑preservation and defensiveness, often lashing out sharply when hurt or threatened. For example, their furious call‑out of a privileged white guy — “vc se acha inteligente pra caralho mas na real eh so um branquelo de merda burro e arrogante que usa dos próprios privilégios pra tentar se sentir melhor consigo mesmo pq sabe q eh um bosta ><” — shows a readiness to attack rather than simply endure unfairness. Their fixation on things that make them feel excluded or inferior, like repeatedly feeling awful about missing the MCR show — “provavelmente mes q vem eu vou largar o twitter por um tempinho pq vou ficar genuinamente mal por conta do show do mcr” — hints at the Slytherin sensitivity to status and belonging. There’s also a dark, cutting humor and comfort with taboo topics, like joking about crime and violent impulses — “ai gnt eu deixava morrer” and “tenho vontade de cometer um crime de odio” — that fits Slytherin’s edgier side more than the other houses. While they do show intelligence and wit, their primary vibe is guarded, combative, and survival‑oriented, which aligns most closely with Slytherin.

Your movie

Your song
They explicitly love Mitski and call her new release a “banger”, showing strong emotional alignment with her music: “NOVA MUSICA DA MITSKI TA BANGER PRA CARALHO”. First Love / Late Spring fits their blend of vulnerability, self‑loathing, and intensity, matching tweets like “talvez eu precise me matar” and “quero morrer”. The song’s themes of anxiety and emotional overwhelm mirror how they describe themselves, for example “pqp eu nunca fui tao paranoico doido assim na minha vida antes” and “por algum motivo tenho uma ansiedade ABSMAL de usar o instagram”. Mitski’s introspective, slightly dramatic tone also matches their mix of dark humor and earnestness, like “nn ironicamente mei gato me impediu de me matar”, making this song a strong emotional soundtrack for their online persona.

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