reformedjessica
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In a relationship:
Politically:
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Expressive: Frequently shares feelings, e.g., "cant stop crying n shaking f" and "i feel like im no longer reformed help".
- Socially Engaged: Participates in gaming community, mentions duos on the Rift and streaming, e.g., "most sane duo on the rift fr".
- Resilient: Continues job hunting and personal goals despite struggles, e.g., "im manifesting, i did a great job on interview".
- Creative: Uses humor and unique phrasing, e.g., "puttin cocaine in my lipgloss so when he kisses me he thinks im god".
- Goal Oriented: Plans purchases and events, e.g., "i quit my job so i could have a day off on 16th to get the ariana tickets".
Weaknesses:
- Impulsivity: Posts reckless self‑harm content, e.g., "imma eat my pills like tic tacs tonight".
- Emotional Instability: Shows rapid mood swings and suicidal thoughts, e.g., "i for sure am fine :)" then "cant stop crying n shaking f".
- Attention Seeking: Posts provocative offers for validation, e.g., "pay for my pedicure n i will send u those feet pics".
- Boundary Issues: Shares overly personal details and requests, e.g., "i need support me so i can get my nails done".
- Inconsistent Communication: Contradicts statements and changes stance frequently, e.g., "i am fine :)" followed by "i feel like im no longer reformed".
Your Simpsons character
Moe Szyslak
The user's tweets reveal chronic self‑destructive behavior, frequent references to drug use, suicidal ideation, and a desperate need for emotional support, similar to Moe's well‑known depression and alcoholism. For example, they write "i’m 3 inconveniences away from trying heroin" and "my mom whos supposed to give me my daily dosage of pills ,so i dont overdose again ,just put all of em in my room bc she is pissed im moody", echoing Moe’s reliance on alcohol and his attempts to self‑medicate. Their feelings of being "too ugly to stream with webcam" and constant pleas for validation ("i want girlfriends ,why is every egirl so fake") match Moe’s social awkwardness and loneliness at his bar. The recurring theme of being "reformed" then "not any longer" ("i feel like im no longer reformed help") mirrors Moe’s repeated attempts at sobriety that always collapse. Overall, the combination of desperation, self‑harm, and a façade of coping while secretly spiraling aligns most closely with the character of Moe Szyslak.
Your MBTI personality Type
ESFP
The user’s communication is highly outward‑focused and seeks attention, as seen in posts like “my mom whos supposed to give me my daily dosage of pills …” and “i need someone support me so i can get my nails done to my first day of work.” They describe concrete, sensory experiences (“im alive btw just making money for that new ahri skin”, “puttin cocaine in my lipgloss so when he kisses me he thinks im god”) indicating a Sensing preference. Their decisions are driven by strong emotions (“i cant stop crying n shaking”, “i feel like im no longer reformed help”), showing a Feeling orientation. The frequent impulsive, spontaneous behavior (“i’ll drink so much that my liver fails,” “i’m 3 inconveniences away from trying heroin”) reflects a Perceiving lifestyle. Together these clues point to an ESFP type.
Some pickup lines for you
- Hey support main, want to duo‑queue through life? I’ll keep your heart alive while we chase that Ahri skin together.
- I heard you’re saving up for a $100 Ahri skin—how about I be your lucky charm and we celebrate with a date night when you finally snag it?
- You’re hunting Ariana tickets? Let me be your backstage pass—I'll hype you up and we can sing every chorus together.
- I’m not Kofola, but I can give you that fizzy Slovak spark after a long Rift session—let’s grab a drink and talk strategy.
- Need a pedicure before your first day? Let me be the one who paints your nails and your smile, and maybe a little extra polish on our future.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Support‑role gamer 🎮, coffee enthusiast ☕, meme curator. Once tried to trade ketchup for a skin. Proud mental‑health advocate.– @reformedjessica
Your signature cocktail
Broken Mirror Martini
The Broken Mirror Martini captures @reformedjessica’s chaotic mix of self‑destruction and fleeting optimism, echoing their claim "i for sure am fine :) [picture]". A base of clear vodka mirrors the “fine” façade while the electric blue Curaçao reflects the “Xanax everyday” vibe from "but imagine sabotaging me bc ur high on xanax everyday [picture]". The splash of grenadine adds a bitter‑sweet sting, reminiscent of the raw confession "i’m 3 inconveniences away from trying heroin [picture]". An energy‑drink boost (Red Bull) channels the frantic energy of "im gonna drink so much that my liver fails in the middle of the night and i dont wake up next morning [picture]". Finally, a dash of hot sauce gives a fiery kick, nodding to the reckless line "puttin cocaine in my lipgloss so when he kisses me he thinks im god [picture]".
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Jessica's tweets repeatedly show a drive for personal advantage, manipulation, and strategic planning, which are core Slytherin traits. For instance, she asks "how to be a good seller, recommend me some books, im trynna nail my first month at work" and declares "i quit my job so i could have a day off on 16th to get the ariana tickets np," highlighting ambition and resourcefulness. She also boasts about using substances for control, as in "puttin cocaine in my lipgloss so when he kisses me he thinks im god," a clear example of cunning self‑preservation. While occasional mentions of loyalty appear, the dominant pattern is self‑serving ambition, making Slytherin the best fit.
Your movie
Your song
Hurt - Nine Inch Nails (popularized by Johnny Cash)
The raw confession of self‑destruction in "Hurt" mirrors Jessica’s frequent mentions of self‑harm, such as "imma eat my pills like tic tacs tonight" and "i’m 3 inconveniences away from trying heroin." The lyric "I hurt myself today to see if I still feel" directly reflects her tweet about feeling broken: "i feel like im no longer reformed help." Her low self‑esteem is evident in "cant join streamersclash bc im too ugly to stream with webcam," echoing the song’s line "the needle tears a hole" that symbolizes both physical and emotional pain. The sense of alienation and loss in the chorus—"What have I become?"—parallels her repeated pleas for support and feeling abandoned, like in "my mom whos supposed to give me my daily dosage of pills" and "my bmi is 16,1 am i fked???". Overall, the song’s bleak, introspective mood captures the chaotic, depressive, and self‑critical tone of her timeline.
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